Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Dirty Laundry 70

I was hanging out last night with Marie, and the first thing out of her mouth was "how'd it go this week with grocery guy?"

Me-:"I avoided the grocery like the plague until Sunday. He doesn't work on Sundays. I was leaving my building, and as I stepped onto the sidewalk, he literally turned the corner into my path."

Marie-:"Great! Did you talk?"  she was glowing with giddiness.

Me-:"I turned and ran in the other direction through the parking lot."

Marie-:"You need to say yes to him when he asks you out."

Me-:"He's not going to ask me out."

Marie-:"Trust me, he will."

Me-:"Here's what's wrong with that statement. A, he's too young like fifteen maybe even twenty years younger too young. And B, I'm not attracted to him. If he does ask, I have to say no. Which will suck because I know way too well what it feels like to be rejected. Or I'll end up feeling so crappy that I will say yes and get stuck in a situation that is bad for everyone."

Her happy glow seemed to slip a bit and I know she was thinking then of her own relationship and how she's not happy either in her current one. Didn't stop her from trying to talk me into going to the grocery with her though before they closed.

Marie-:"You need to get back out there and start dating again."

Me-:"Aware of that." I felt like saying I didn't need everyone around me to keep drilling that information into my brains.

Marie-:"Why not do a dating site then?"

Me-:"Done those in the past and they brought nothing."

Marie-:"Well, give it another try. Can't be that bad?"

I grabbed her laptop and pulled up a dating site that lets you do a search without having to sign up for it first.

Me-:"Let's see. Woman looking for man, 33 to 40, Caucasian, never married, no kids." she was still smirking while the thing did it's search. "No matches."

Marie-:"Widen your search."

Me-:"Fine. 32 to 41"   The page then spun again and a few photos popped up. "Three. There are three men in the whole country who match. Two in Vancouver, one in Montreal."

Marie-:"Widen your search again."

Me-:"To what? That's all of Canada. And it's telling me there are only three men who match up." I was actually getting a bit pissed off at this point as we checked out their profiles. One was clearly older than he'd listed himself to be, another was dressed in hunting gear, the last one who was marginally good looking didn't have a single photo where he wasn't sitting in a bar.

Marie-:"Message this one."

Me-:"We're sorry, but you don't match their desired search qualities."  Bar guy wanted someone who was a Catholic, the older one wanted someone under thirty, and the hunter just wanted someone in their area only.

Marie-:"Widen your search then." she literally opened her arms gesturing towards the walls.

Me-:"What part of that's all of Canada are you not understanding?"

Marie-:"The Canadian part. Expand into the states."

Me-:"And the point of that would be what now? If I can't afford to travel across the province to meet a man, how would I travel out of the country itself?"
Marie-:"Well, who says you have to travel to them?"

Me-:"I'm not going to win this am I?"

Marie-:"No, widen your search."

Friday, June 9, 2017

post it note June 8th 2017

Dear Mr. Scratchy:

It's just before 12:00am EST here. I spent most of the day chatting with Marie and trying to write the next two parts of the fairy tale. Here's the thing. My heart's not in it anymore. Nor is it in doing reviews, or the video projects or much of anything.  How do you bounce back from that? 

I imagine you checking in to this tonight Herman, dressed in black track pants and an orange t-shirt and grey hoodie. I think you've got a cup of take-away coffee beside you and a plate of nachos. I also believe you are trying to get something written in script form, I'm guessing for a promo. Assuming you are doing the indie shows and have to write your own stuff.

Honestly, I don't know what pulled me in here tonight to post this?  I really want to ask if you injured your left leg? There is just something nagging in the back of my mind to ask so...asking, did you Mr. Scratchy, injure your left leg in the last week?  Okay Herman, that's it for me tonight. I need to figure out how to avoid the dude from the grocery store that Marie is determined to set me up with.

As always Mr. Scratchy, dream of me.

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Dirty Laundry 69

I went for coffee with my friend Marie. Right off I could tell something was bothering her from the way she slumped in her seat. When I asked, she showed me a message from twitter. This guy has started to follow her on there, and he's now following everyone she is. But it bummed her out a bit.

Marie-:"Just look at what he posted."  she showed me his tweet from last night. I didn't see anything wrong with it, just song lyrics. "I posted something and two minutes later he posted this." I still didn't get the bad to be honest. She continued to show me the last few weeks of posts between them. Every time she posts something, he does the same theme. She talked about the band Flock of Seagulls, he posted a cartoon of seagulls. She posted about a ring she was wanting, he talked about a piece of jewellery with the same coloured stone.

Me-:"Dude! Actions speak louder than words. He's so into you!"

Marie-:"I don't think so."

Me-:"Trust me! He is. He's making a point to get into what you're into." damn, if there was a man on this planet who wanted my attention enough to interact like that with me on instagram or youtube, I'd be listening to what his non-words were saying; not pouting over it.

While we were there, this one guy who works at the grocery store walked in. Marie turned around in her seat and started to giggle.

Marie-:"That one again."  referring to the fact this guy had been in the coffee shop three times while we were there.  And he stood in line, of which there wasn't one, just stood there in the middle of the building far enough away from the counter and too close to where we were sitting, just staring at us. "Oh he just turned away all red."

Me-:"Cause he saw you staring at him."

Marie-:"He's embarrassed he got caught staring at you." she had the biggest smirk on her face as he ordered his donut. We started to get up to leave, when the grocery store guy took the seat beside our's. "Do you want to stay for a few more minutes?" Marie sat back down giggling.

Me-:"I thought you needed to get home for the dogs?" I could feel him staring at us, and it caused me to blush. I ended up having to sit down again because Marie was not getting back up. The dude had sat so he was facing her direction.

Marie-:"Okay, I need a smoke so outside." and then she practically dragged me out of the building.  "He was looking at you the whole time. I totally think he was trying to get the guts to ask you out!"

Me-:"He sat so you were in his direct view not me."

Marie-:"But he was looking at you. Surprised he didn't break his neck the way he was twisting it. How old you think he is?"

Me-:"I don't know? In his twenties maybe? Too young for me."

Marie-:"Age is but a number. Besides, he's not your future husband. You deserve a fling." she winked at me as she started to head towards home.

Me-:"You say that like you've seen something." I turned following her. She laughed again. "You did see something. What the hell did you see?"

She just shrugged and told me to have fun before October. Yeah, sometimes being friends with a psychic can be complicated.