Saturday, September 24, 2011


My phone rang last night with a number I didn't know.   Normally I wouldn't answer it, but I'd just bumped into Storm a few minutes before at the grocery and was hoping it was him. 

It was not.  
It was a family member I have never even met and he was informing me that he's getting married.  I was more then upset that my mother handed out my phone number and then lied to me about it, but that's another thing for another time.

Ironically, the themes on all the shows/movies I've seen this week have been weddings.  One mistake I made was watching an episode of Charmed with mother. It was about weddings and Handfastings.   My mistake was not the actual show but the comment I made without thinking about how Handfastings are older traditions then religious weddings. 

Trust me when I say it started a small riot from my mother who holds a legal church wedding as the highest form of status.

People seem to forget that before there were these big fat weddings, or even justice of the piece or anything of the like; there were unions done simply by deciding to be committed to each other.  Handfastings, being older then other social identifying "weddings" {jumping the broom is as old} may not be legal in some places, but still as binding; maybe even more so as it's seen as a spiritual commitment.

I am mentioning all this because the whole issue is still a buzz in my family tonight.  I can't seem to escape it.   And no I am not going to his wedding.

I believe in marriage, not so much on big fat weddings.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Zaniness of it Part 5

On my way home from mother's tonight, stopped in at the grocery for a few minutes.  Decided to go through Zane's check out because it's express.
Jammed to the gills with people.

He smiled really big at me when he saw me and asked how everything was. Told him fine, and noticing his hair had started to grow back in.
He replied that he wasn't sure if he was going to keep up the mohawk or not.  Then I asked where his glasses were?
He blushed telling me that he's always in a rush in the mornings and has forgotten them a bunch of times, pointing to one of the ladies who works the next tile, he then told me he can't see anyone.
My reply, "might be a good thing."

He blushed again as I told him I happened to really like the glasses {no I did not tell him I generally melt for men in glasses that would be too much for the poor boy}
He blushed again saying he liked hearing things like that.  I sort of shook my head cause I know we had a similar conversation about that awhile back when he first got them.

Zane-: "You're bleeding."  he pointed to my arm.

Me-: "Yeah, Mr. Scr... I had a bit of a scratching issue little while ago."   {right like Zane needs to know about my Mr. Scratchy} 

Zane-: "Take care of that."  he was still blushing when he handed me my bill. 

That is the most relaxed he's been around me in two years.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

When it's Right

I was watching the episode  "One" of Sex and the City {end of season five -beginning of season 6} which is the episode where Miranda tells Steve that she loves him after years of not being able to say "I love you"  to anyone.

This is one of the episodes that makes me cry every single time I see it because I've yet to be able to say "I love you" to anyone I've ever had in my life.

There was a line in the episode  where Miranda confesses to Carrie that she always thought it would be easy to say I love you to the right guy, thinking that when she knew who he was it would just pop out of her mouth.
In the end it does, but it takes a long while for it to happen.

On the weekend, {Saturday} I had posted a short few sentences on my main blog with the promise of doing a follow up the next day.  My right hand and arm were itchier then they have been in weeks.
My Mr. Scratchy was thinking about me from shortly after I posted on Saturday night, till about ten minutes after I did the follow up post on Sunday night.

Obviously he was thinking about me.  He was, it seemed; extremely interested in what I had to say in regards to those two posts.  Dare I even say the itch factor was total-non-stop during that time frame.

This indeed would seem to narrow down even farther whom my Mr. Scratchy is.

In the case of the blog posts he was waiting for, I hope I did not disappoint him. But something tells me that I just didn't say what he might have hoped I would say in those two particular posts.

Disappointing people is something no one wants to do, but many of us end up doing a lot.

This is the point where normally I would bring it back to the SATC episode and wrap it all up to make a bit of sense {Miranda disappoints the character Robert whom she had been dating and Steve disappoints the character Debbie whom he'd been dating} but I just can't on this one. 

I guess I would get a big X on this "One" SATC connection post.

Monday, September 19, 2011

Hug me

The phrase "emotional roller coaster" has been popping up everywhere today.

It's one of those days where a hug would be the perfect ending to a stressful day.  Only, there's nobody here to get that hug from.
It's been proven by science, by doctors, by therapists, by advice columnists, by kids on the playground that something as simple as a hug does the body and spirit good. 

I had planned on coming in here and posting about an episode from Sex and the City  but changed my mind {may post about it later} because my mind keeps wandering. Simple as that. 
It keeps wandering to the last time I got a hug from somebody.  And I don't mean those fake how you dos from the type of people who like to air kiss so that their make-up doesn't get ruined when they bump into you at the mall either. 
Real caring there for you hugs.  And the sad part is, I can not for the life of me remember the last time I got a hug.

For some of us, as we age we find that human contact is a plentiful thing every time we turn around and for the rest of us, it's as sparse as rain in the desert. 
It's moments like this that has me wondering when there might be a rain shower to ease the suffering?

Sunday, September 18, 2011

I don't know how she does it - 2011

This weekend saw the opening of the latest Sarah Jessica Parker film,  I Don't Know How She Does It.  

Plot: Kate is a mother of two, married to a successful man in Boston, juggling a high stress career.  With the help of her best friend who is a single mom and her assistant who never takes a break for anything, Kate has been able to keep her head above water long enough to get a major pitch which would add two more months of travel time to her already  whirlwind schedule. Her marriage starts to suffer, her kids spend more time with the nanny then she ever dreamed they could, her new partner becomes a second husband and her assistant gets pregnant.

This is the woman who brought beloved Carrie Bradshaw to millions on SATC so bets are high that she'd be able to turn another book's lead into movie magic.
I've been waiting for months for this film and decided to go yesterday.  I wish I had just waited, as for some reason there were a group of 8 year old girls in the cinema.  I'll ask before I do anything else,  how does a group of 8 year olds get into a movie without a parent for starters and into a movie that is not G rated? 

The movie played a bit like a Sunday night movie of the week. The jokes were all used for the trailer and it didn't have the kind of punch I was expecting.
It does however, address the question of how far are we willing to go before we say enough.  The film deals with relationships on all levels, marriage, friendship, business, children and self.

The main "love story" in this film is between the lead and her two business partners; Jack who she spends over half her time with, and Momo her assistant who is about the only one who sees both sides of her life.  In a sense, she becomes "wife and mother" to these two co-workers without really loosing herself in the process.

And if you're wondering what this has to do with this blog other then the Sarah Jessica Parker element; it's the relationships that matter here.  With the way we interact in life right now, most of us have these emotional affairs and non-family-families that we rely on more then we might even realize. {Bridget Jones's Diary made famous the term  Urban Family to describe this}

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

If I had an Eric

It was laundry day today.  I was over at mother's, doing her laundry {and threw in a few items of my own} when this lady who moved into the building few months ago, started talking to us while we were sorting towels.

First she asked me how I was.  I told her fine.  Then she turned to my mother and told her that "you have a very pretty daughter."

This is a comment you expect from seniors who are in their 80's etc;  not from a woman who is only in her early 40's.
Nor is this the first time she's said this to my mom or similar to me. 

More than a few times when I've been coming into the building, she's been standing around the lobby just waiting and the second she sees me has come running over to where I am making strange purring sounds.  She's like a stalker in a mild sense.

Is she crazy or just a Lesbian with no straight-dar? 

It got to the point today where I had to mention a guy's name out loud in front of her; in fact butting in to inform my mother that "Eric" had decided to grow a beard.   Ironically mother caught the idea and agreed that "Eric" needs to shave. 
This seemed to do the trick and the stalker-woman stopped complimenting me for the remainder of the time we were getting the laundry. 

Now, if I can just meet a guy that easy.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Dirty Laundry part 6

My cousin Walsh was around yesterday for a few minutes, and I made the mistake of asking if he's read the blog at all lately.   He laughed nodding at me.

 Walsh-: "I knew you were going to ask that. I think you need to not talk so much about the Double Starr and the Canadian Impact Dude."

Me-:"Um why?"

Walsh-:"You're going to make him jealous. You're skunk boy. The Celebrity."

Me-: "What is it with you and your stepmom? She's forever calling him a skunk and a crackhead."

Walsh- :"Well, he does have that going on."

Me-: "No, seriously, why do you think that?"

Walsh-: " Cause I think you hurt The Other Guy's feelings before and are needing to chill out a bit and think about it. I see you're scratches are healing too."

Me-: "Yeah. That's actually not good.  Means Mr. Scratchy has stopped thinking of me like he used to. Is it weird for me to say I want him back?  Given that I don't really truly know who he even is?"

He shrugged making a weird little duckbill with his lips.

Walsh-: "Coming from anyone else yes coming from you, its understandable and dare I say normal thing to hear.  But I think it's time you either did something to make your 'Mr.Scratchy'"  {he dropped his voice smiling bright} "confess to who he is or just you know... date. You know what Grandma used to say.  A watched pot never boils."

Me-: "Yes I know I say it all the time myself."

Walsh-: "Best advice you could give yourself. My advice is just relax he's a guy. 'Mr. Scratchy' " {he dropped his voice again smiling like it was a commercial}  "will tell you who he is when he's ready."

Me-: "Why do you keep doing that saying it like your selling dish soap?"

Walsh-: "I don't know, in a good mood tonight. Besides, could make a ton of money selling dish soap."

Monday, September 12, 2011

Mindless Monday Sept 12 2011

Tampons. Gotta love them.  And ever since that one episode of SATC when they put a box of tampons on the table, they have become talkable topics.
In this case, standing in line at the grocery needing to pay for them. 

Storm was talking to some short girl about god only knows what gesturing wildly to his face, the girl looking like someone just gutted her.   He spotted me and stopped talking completely rushing off back to the display of corn.
Still standing in line with the blue box of tampons, when they got an announcement over the speakers for all floor staff to customer service.  Storm walked behind me and I saw him suddenly fixing his hair, then looked back at me, smoothed out the back of his hair again. {its short and a dirty brown/sandy colour} Looked back twice more before I left. 

I think it was more then just seeing the tampon box.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Random Sunday -Sept 11-11

I started scratching my right arm as I walked into the grocery, debating on if I was going to order the pay-per-view tonight or not?
I decided not to because I have no idea who's on the card as I still have not seen this week's episode of wrestling.
I heard a noise and turned to see a very cute looking repair guy staring at me.  Then I nearly crashed into an old lady.  Smooth way to start today.
I was there for one thing, which I got and as I did, spotted Storm come out of the back room.  He spotted me and headed right back in.

What the hell?

I got into T.C. 's line, and wished that I had bothered to go through the express and Zane was working.  I haven't made up my mind on T.C. yet.  He's like a puppy.  Quick, yappy and always with his mouth open.
But he was leaning forward saying something, and I got caught looking around at where Storm should have been but wasn't.

T.C. -: "I don't know what people see in him when there are much better opitions around."  he grinned at me but before I could say anything he handed me my bill.

Why is it I keep wondering, that I can get the attention of guys that are younger then my leather jacket but can't get the attention of guys I'd like to date?

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Tidbits Thursday 9/8/2011

As I walked off the elevator today in the doctor's office, I walked right into a conversation two old ladies were having about an erotic book.
The first lady could not get over the fact there was such detail in the sex scenes and was nearly disgusted at the whole thing.

The second lady just nodded and blushed before saying that all she needed was a good "hero".  A guy who takes her and rips her outfit off and she was good to go.

As my day continued I had moments where I thought about the snip of conversation I walked in on. 

Personally, I happen to like my "heroes"  a bit more on the nerdy shy side.  But I have to admit, I've been having the same dream over and over recently where I'm "rescued"  from a very humiliating situation.

I wonder what that says about me?

Monday, September 5, 2011

He touched my turnip

Knowing that this being a long weekend, the stores would be closed today, mom planned yesterday for today's supper, sending me in search of turnip.
As I was in the infamous produce area, Mr. iPod and Storm were working on a display of grapefruit. I was in a mood and really just wanted to get out of there.

No such luck Storm spotted me and screamed out my name then asking how my day was as he hadn't seen me around for a few days.  I told him that I was having a crap time of things.   What I should have said was that I was in a rush, but I wasn't that smart.

He moved away from Mr.iPod, and sort of cornered me wanting to know what was wrong.  I told him about being stood up not once, but twice actually by the Ramsey Fan. 
Storm, suddenly became like a stringed puppet unable to stand still.  He leaned towards me, then away from me, then said he was sorry to hear that.

He then went into a speech about his kid and while he was talking, one of the new guys started to collect up the baskets a few feet away from us, and I looked.   Storm saw me looking and moved around me so that he was directly blocking my view of the new guy.


Then he complimented my shirt and necklace.  Let me point out that I was wearing a baggy old shirt with a movie logo on it and my necklace was a dark stone that was the same colour as the shirt.  He would have had to really be studying my boobs to see the necklace.

Then he literally leaned into my basket pulled out the items and started to talk to himself about the turnip. 
The new guy moved another few feet towards us and Storm sort of guided me towards the checkout.

I walked out of the store in silent disbelief.  Talk about mixed messages.   And why did he need to know what was in my shopping basket?

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Steam up your windows Part eight

10pm came and went and Caleb was still waiting for Estelle to get there. Their relationship was starting to drive him crazy.  He hated the way she had him by the balls like this.  Getting up for a drink, he decided that he didn't want to be in this back and forth situation any longer.  Estelle had already broken his heart more then once and he was not going to let her do it again. 
He could have any woman he wanted, he reminded himself as he poured a large glass of whiskey, leaning one strong pale arm on the counter.  So what was it about her that had him all tangled up inside? 
Caleb quickened his pace as he moved back into the living room turning off the computer then the lights.  Damn her if she couldn't keep on schedule.  He headed back down the dim hallway to his bedroom. 

It was a cool night, the curtain blowing lightly in the open window.  Someone in the neighbourhood was setting off fireworks which lit up the night sky, casting shadows on his bedroom wall.  Scratching mindlessly at his right hand, he took a large swallow of the whiskey, his eyes darting back and forth as he watched the shadows on the wall, counting to ten before the next blast went off. 

That's when he made up his mind that he was not staying in, not going to wait again for her.  The dark haired man shot across the room opening the doors to his closet asking himself where he wanted to go?

He sat at the bar, one arm lazily crossed over the other, nursing a sour tasting beer.  Cheap beer, whatever was on tap and it set the mood perfectly.  He'd chosen a pair of dark blue jeans and a black buttoned shirt. Cheap bar, cheaper still were the quality of people in the bar.  The dj hadn't even bothered to show up and the jukebox seemed to groan under its own weight; an old 70's band on constant loop. 
Caleb was just about to leave when he saw this woman walk in.  Tall, blonde, rake thin. Nothing like Estelle. Nodding to himself he made up his mind he'd settle in with one more bad beer and see what her situation was. He didn't have to wait for long before she was standing at his side trying to get his attention. 
Letting out a deep breath, he finished off his beer and sized up the situation.  The blonde flirted in the usual ways, leaned in too close letting him get more then an eyeful of her tanned body, played with her hair just an inch too much, and seemed to have decided his wrist was the perfect resting place for her hand. 
He felt dirty suddenly as he moved away from her grappling hook grip.  Excusing himself, Caleb turned and left the bar letting the night air wash over him.    He shuttered for a second thinking that this had been the worst idea he'd had in a very long time.   His shoes were nearly silent as he started the walk home, his hands deep in the pockets of his jeans. 

As he waited for the lights Caleb spotted two teenagers across the street.  They were locked in a tight embrace, kissing with the innocent hunger that he remembered being 17 could bring. Silently he let his gaze fall on them as the kids were not shy with their lustful goodnight.  A light came on from the house they were in front of, and the girl turned to look as the window opened.  Caleb crossed the street letting a smile escape him.  Suddenly all he could think of was the way Estelle's lips felt when she kissed the hollow of his neck.
Walking into his apartment he found there was a puddle of light spilling down the hallway.  Locking the door behind him he didn't have to call out.   Estelle's sneakers were by the door beside her purse. He'd forgotten she still had a key. 
Pretending he didn't see anything, he walked right past the bedroom and into the bathroom closing the door quietly.  

Part 9 soon

Friday, September 2, 2011

Lack of communication

The other night, Nura and I were chatting for awhile and mid sentence she stated that she hasn't had sex with her husband more then 13 times since Valentines Day.

It threw me for a loop. 
For some people, that's normal or above normal.  For Nura and Earnan, that's a major drought and miscommunication.   This is a couple who have no issues getting it on at the drop of a hat, in front of people even. 

I could do nothing but sit there listening as she told me about her marriage crumbling.  

I have said it before many times, other then talking; sex is the biggest part of communication.  When you stop having sex in your relationship, you have stopped over half of your communication in your relationship.

As I sit here now thinking about her situation, I have to wonder if they can repair their marriage or not?

There is an episode of Sex and the City, where Carrie and Big's sex life starts to slow down which freaks Carrie out, while Miranda has been celibate for months.  Both are feeling a lack of connection and are unable to express themselves properly.

There is always another issue underlining a lack of sexual communication. 

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Thursday Tidbits- Sept 1

I sat in the coffee shop for half an hour, the Ramsey Fan never showed.

To be honest, I'm not overly upset that the date with this guy was a bust,  just that my first date in months was.

I know I've been with the attitude that I'm not ready right now to date, but the last few days, I have to admit that I am.

I think it's got more to do with Storm's behavouir last few days then anything else.

You got Male 2

So the other night, the pushy Ramsey Fan messaged me again, and asked if I wanted to go for a coffee tonight?
I thought about it for a bit and said sure what the hell.

After the odd behavouir of the men around here this week, I'm not sure what to expect. And given the fact I haven't had a date in way too long, I'm sort of looking forward to it.