Last week, I was out having coffee with a friend, who asked me to do a tarot reading for her. The Lovers card and the Two of Swords both popped up. Indecision. She nodded and started to rub her back and side. She'd been having sharp pains for a few days. I did the reading, and asked her how things were going with the new guy she was dating, she said that's what the issue was with the indecision. As we continued our conversation, the more her pain seemed to intensify. I told her that was a sign. Her own anxiety about this new guy was expressing itself in physical pain. She needed to dump him. As we changed the topic, and began commenting on other things, her pains seemed to almost vanish completely. Then, she started talking about this other man she'd had one single date with few months ago, and how she was still halfway interested in him.
That other man walked into the coffee shop and surprised the hell out of both of us. There we were both, wide eyed and not sure how to handle it. He waved and said hello, but didn't stop to chat. My friend turned to me and said out loud, she wondered what the universe was getting at?
She phoned me yesterday to tell me that she had been violently ill all week. The pains got to the point she was vomiting and had to go to the hospital. The doctor's could not find any cause of it. She proceeded to tell me that she broke up with the guy she'd been dating, on Thursday. The pains stopped completely and so did the vomiting.
Here's the thing, she knew all along what she had to do. She just wanted someone else to tell her what she already knew. She'd jumped into a relationship with the wrong man, because she was afraid to be alone.
Showing posts with label Socks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Socks. Show all posts
Sunday, May 27, 2018
Tuesday, September 5, 2017
Dirty Laundry 72
A very loud bang at my window had me shaking, my phone buzzing a few seconds later with a message from my cousin Walsh. I let him in the building just as the one really hot maintenance guy was walking in. The look maintenance guy gave him was interesting to say the lest. Walsh was waiting for my aunt who was at the dentist few buildings away.
Me-:"You've got to stop doing that. Scared me, thought someone had broken the window."
Walsh-:"Sorry. You excited about your trip?"
Me-:"What trip?"
Walsh-:"I thought you were going to Las Vegas?"
Me-:"That's not till like next summer. Few of the girls from the occult store are going like in July next year. I've still haven't decided."
Walsh-:"So you're not going anywhere in October? Cause your mom was over for dinner the other night and said you were talking about going away next month?"
Me-:"Marie and one of her friends are going to some fan thingie in Minneapolis. They've been bugging for me to join, make it a girls weekend."
He started looking through the kitchen for something before grabbing the kettle and filling it.
Walsh-:"You don't want to go? Why not?"
Me-:"Remember the scene in Gremlins when they stuff the one in the microwave and it explodes?"
Walsh-:"No, but say I do."
Me-:"That would be me crossing from Canada to the states. Besides, isn't there like a civil war or something happening down there? Practically anyways?"
Walsh-:"No. I don't think it's that bad yet?"
Me-:"There is no point in going. I'm not into the event or the people doing the convention. I find sitting in a car for 6 hours dreadful. Their big plan is to stay at a casino the weekend. If I wanted to hang in a casino, I'd go across town to the one we have here. It's a boring plan. To me, it's boring."
Walsh-:"Wow, you actually sound angry." he made himself a cup of coffee before sitting at the kitchen table.
Me-:"It just sucks. I haven't been anywhere in years, and that's my only option right now. Something that I have no say in if I go. And if I don't go, then I loose out on any invites with the group later on. Just a no win situation."
Walsh-:"I'd go if I was you."
Me-:"You know how I feel about the states. Leaves a bad taste in my throat." He halfway laughed nearly choking on his coffee. "I didn't mean it that way."
Me-:"You've got to stop doing that. Scared me, thought someone had broken the window."
Walsh-:"Sorry. You excited about your trip?"
Me-:"What trip?"
Walsh-:"I thought you were going to Las Vegas?"
Me-:"That's not till like next summer. Few of the girls from the occult store are going like in July next year. I've still haven't decided."
Walsh-:"So you're not going anywhere in October? Cause your mom was over for dinner the other night and said you were talking about going away next month?"
Me-:"Marie and one of her friends are going to some fan thingie in Minneapolis. They've been bugging for me to join, make it a girls weekend."
He started looking through the kitchen for something before grabbing the kettle and filling it.
Walsh-:"You don't want to go? Why not?"
Me-:"Remember the scene in Gremlins when they stuff the one in the microwave and it explodes?"
Walsh-:"No, but say I do."
Me-:"That would be me crossing from Canada to the states. Besides, isn't there like a civil war or something happening down there? Practically anyways?"
Walsh-:"No. I don't think it's that bad yet?"
Me-:"There is no point in going. I'm not into the event or the people doing the convention. I find sitting in a car for 6 hours dreadful. Their big plan is to stay at a casino the weekend. If I wanted to hang in a casino, I'd go across town to the one we have here. It's a boring plan. To me, it's boring."
Walsh-:"Wow, you actually sound angry." he made himself a cup of coffee before sitting at the kitchen table.
Me-:"It just sucks. I haven't been anywhere in years, and that's my only option right now. Something that I have no say in if I go. And if I don't go, then I loose out on any invites with the group later on. Just a no win situation."
Walsh-:"I'd go if I was you."
Me-:"You know how I feel about the states. Leaves a bad taste in my throat." He halfway laughed nearly choking on his coffee. "I didn't mean it that way."
Friday, July 14, 2017
Dirty Laundry 71
So yesterday, I was hanging out with Marie. We had gone for coffee and she pulled up this video on twitter shoving the phone to my hear telling me to listen and tell her what I thought of it.
Me-:"Well he's drunk."
Marie-:"He doesn't drink though."
Me-:"Then he's really stoned."
Marie-:"No. He doesn't do that."
Me-:"You're telling me that that isn't an extremely drunk depressed guy?"
she played it again twice listening to it with her eyes closed.
Marie-:"You think I'm reading too much into it?"
Me-:"No. He's picked something he knows will 100% get your attention, like right after you said you weren't going to talk to him about the situation anymore. This is his reacting to it. Reacting badly, but reacting none the less." the building was starting to get really crowded so we left, walking around the parking lot a bit before going into the grocery.
Here's the thing. Few nights ago, we were hanging out at her place and she started talking about how when she was younger she'd be the bold one of her group and just randomly go up to a hot guy and ask him out or his name etc, for her friends. I didn't think anything of it, because we were talking about her situation with Mr. Tweets. Well, I should have thought something of it, because we weren't in the store more than a minute when she turned spotting the Grocery Boy pointed at him. He saw us and had this look as if cold water had been thrown on him.
Then it got weird.
He started to wander from aisle to aisle circling us. Yeah, he was following us without trying to look like he was. And we were not quiet. The more Marie noticed him, the louder she got. It was like 8th grade all over again, only not as respectable. And she kept making me laugh. Like cartoon witch cackling snorting laugh. Yeah, that bad. Every time we passed one of the standing freezers, she started to play with her hair fixing it, blushing.
At this point, I had groceries that needed to be paid for so I went and stood in line while she continued to wander around. I saw her talking to one of the other stock boys, blushing and stammering like a teenager before catching up to me with this look of pure triumph on her face.
Me-:"What did you do?"
She pointed to the one guy smiling like a goofball as we walked out of the building.
Marie-:"I asked what the name of your guy is."
Me-:"That's it? Seriously, what did you say?"
Marie-:"I just asked if he could tell me who the guy he was talking to's name was because my friend though he might be her nephew and she needed to double check..."
Me-:"What? What the hell? How is that going to...what the f***?" I nearly tripped over my own feet on that.
Marie-:"I said we thought his name was ----- and we needed to make sure. And guess what, it actually was." she shrugged at me lighting a smoke.
Me-:"Oh my god! Why did you do that? Now he's going to think we're related!"
Marie-:"Not like hot guy there is going to tell him. Besides, I was the one who asked, and I don't shop there so not like he's going to ever see me again."
Me-:"He's going to be all like 'dude, some chick was asking about you, says she's your aunt'; and buddy is going to ask what you looked like and figure it out. He's going to think we're related now and if he was crushing on me, he won't be anymore."
Marie-:"-----. His name which I just learned is -----." she actually curtsied. She honestly didn't see the issue.
I spent a few hours playing it over in my head last night, wondering if she did it on purpose because she might actually be interested in him herself, or if she really didn't think the co-worker would relay the message, or if it just didn't occur to her that by saying that she would possibly creep the dude out. It was like being back in high school all over again, or college for that matter, and those times my prettier friends snagged the guy I liked because they could.
Me-:"Well he's drunk."
Marie-:"He doesn't drink though."
Me-:"Then he's really stoned."
Marie-:"No. He doesn't do that."
Me-:"You're telling me that that isn't an extremely drunk depressed guy?"
she played it again twice listening to it with her eyes closed.
Marie-:"You think I'm reading too much into it?"
Me-:"No. He's picked something he knows will 100% get your attention, like right after you said you weren't going to talk to him about the situation anymore. This is his reacting to it. Reacting badly, but reacting none the less." the building was starting to get really crowded so we left, walking around the parking lot a bit before going into the grocery.
Here's the thing. Few nights ago, we were hanging out at her place and she started talking about how when she was younger she'd be the bold one of her group and just randomly go up to a hot guy and ask him out or his name etc, for her friends. I didn't think anything of it, because we were talking about her situation with Mr. Tweets. Well, I should have thought something of it, because we weren't in the store more than a minute when she turned spotting the Grocery Boy pointed at him. He saw us and had this look as if cold water had been thrown on him.
Then it got weird.
He started to wander from aisle to aisle circling us. Yeah, he was following us without trying to look like he was. And we were not quiet. The more Marie noticed him, the louder she got. It was like 8th grade all over again, only not as respectable. And she kept making me laugh. Like cartoon witch cackling snorting laugh. Yeah, that bad. Every time we passed one of the standing freezers, she started to play with her hair fixing it, blushing.
At this point, I had groceries that needed to be paid for so I went and stood in line while she continued to wander around. I saw her talking to one of the other stock boys, blushing and stammering like a teenager before catching up to me with this look of pure triumph on her face.
Me-:"What did you do?"
She pointed to the one guy smiling like a goofball as we walked out of the building.
Marie-:"I asked what the name of your guy is."
Me-:"That's it? Seriously, what did you say?"
Marie-:"I just asked if he could tell me who the guy he was talking to's name was because my friend though he might be her nephew and she needed to double check..."
Me-:"What? What the hell? How is that going to...what the f***?" I nearly tripped over my own feet on that.
Marie-:"I said we thought his name was ----- and we needed to make sure. And guess what, it actually was." she shrugged at me lighting a smoke.
Me-:"Oh my god! Why did you do that? Now he's going to think we're related!"
Marie-:"Not like hot guy there is going to tell him. Besides, I was the one who asked, and I don't shop there so not like he's going to ever see me again."
Me-:"He's going to be all like 'dude, some chick was asking about you, says she's your aunt'; and buddy is going to ask what you looked like and figure it out. He's going to think we're related now and if he was crushing on me, he won't be anymore."
Marie-:"-----. His name which I just learned is -----." she actually curtsied. She honestly didn't see the issue.
I spent a few hours playing it over in my head last night, wondering if she did it on purpose because she might actually be interested in him herself, or if she really didn't think the co-worker would relay the message, or if it just didn't occur to her that by saying that she would possibly creep the dude out. It was like being back in high school all over again, or college for that matter, and those times my prettier friends snagged the guy I liked because they could.
Tuesday, June 13, 2017
Dirty Laundry 70
I was hanging out last night with Marie, and the first thing out of her mouth was "how'd it go this week with grocery guy?"
Me-:"I avoided the grocery like the plague until Sunday. He doesn't work on Sundays. I was leaving my building, and as I stepped onto the sidewalk, he literally turned the corner into my path."
Marie-:"Great! Did you talk?" she was glowing with giddiness.
Me-:"I turned and ran in the other direction through the parking lot."
Marie-:"You need to say yes to him when he asks you out."
Me-:"He's not going to ask me out."
Marie-:"Trust me, he will."
Me-:"Here's what's wrong with that statement. A, he's too young like fifteen maybe even twenty years younger too young. And B, I'm not attracted to him. If he does ask, I have to say no. Which will suck because I know way too well what it feels like to be rejected. Or I'll end up feeling so crappy that I will say yes and get stuck in a situation that is bad for everyone."
Her happy glow seemed to slip a bit and I know she was thinking then of her own relationship and how she's not happy either in her current one. Didn't stop her from trying to talk me into going to the grocery with her though before they closed.
Marie-:"You need to get back out there and start dating again."
Me-:"Aware of that." I felt like saying I didn't need everyone around me to keep drilling that information into my brains.
Marie-:"Why not do a dating site then?"
Me-:"Done those in the past and they brought nothing."
Marie-:"Well, give it another try. Can't be that bad?"
I grabbed her laptop and pulled up a dating site that lets you do a search without having to sign up for it first.
Me-:"Let's see. Woman looking for man, 33 to 40, Caucasian, never married, no kids." she was still smirking while the thing did it's search. "No matches."
Marie-:"Widen your search."
Me-:"Fine. 32 to 41" The page then spun again and a few photos popped up. "Three. There are three men in the whole country who match. Two in Vancouver, one in Montreal."
Marie-:"Widen your search again."
Me-:"To what? That's all of Canada. And it's telling me there are only three men who match up." I was actually getting a bit pissed off at this point as we checked out their profiles. One was clearly older than he'd listed himself to be, another was dressed in hunting gear, the last one who was marginally good looking didn't have a single photo where he wasn't sitting in a bar.
Marie-:"Message this one."
Me-:"We're sorry, but you don't match their desired search qualities." Bar guy wanted someone who was a Catholic, the older one wanted someone under thirty, and the hunter just wanted someone in their area only.
Marie-:"Widen your search then." she literally opened her arms gesturing towards the walls.
Me-:"What part of that's all of Canada are you not understanding?"
Marie-:"The Canadian part. Expand into the states."
Me-:"And the point of that would be what now? If I can't afford to travel across the province to meet a man, how would I travel out of the country itself?"
Marie-:"Well, who says you have to travel to them?"
Me-:"I'm not going to win this am I?"
Marie-:"No, widen your search."
Me-:"I avoided the grocery like the plague until Sunday. He doesn't work on Sundays. I was leaving my building, and as I stepped onto the sidewalk, he literally turned the corner into my path."
Marie-:"Great! Did you talk?" she was glowing with giddiness.
Me-:"I turned and ran in the other direction through the parking lot."
Marie-:"You need to say yes to him when he asks you out."
Me-:"He's not going to ask me out."
Marie-:"Trust me, he will."
Me-:"Here's what's wrong with that statement. A, he's too young like fifteen maybe even twenty years younger too young. And B, I'm not attracted to him. If he does ask, I have to say no. Which will suck because I know way too well what it feels like to be rejected. Or I'll end up feeling so crappy that I will say yes and get stuck in a situation that is bad for everyone."
Her happy glow seemed to slip a bit and I know she was thinking then of her own relationship and how she's not happy either in her current one. Didn't stop her from trying to talk me into going to the grocery with her though before they closed.
Marie-:"You need to get back out there and start dating again."
Me-:"Aware of that." I felt like saying I didn't need everyone around me to keep drilling that information into my brains.
Marie-:"Why not do a dating site then?"
Me-:"Done those in the past and they brought nothing."
Marie-:"Well, give it another try. Can't be that bad?"
I grabbed her laptop and pulled up a dating site that lets you do a search without having to sign up for it first.
Me-:"Let's see. Woman looking for man, 33 to 40, Caucasian, never married, no kids." she was still smirking while the thing did it's search. "No matches."
Marie-:"Widen your search."
Me-:"Fine. 32 to 41" The page then spun again and a few photos popped up. "Three. There are three men in the whole country who match. Two in Vancouver, one in Montreal."
Marie-:"Widen your search again."
Me-:"To what? That's all of Canada. And it's telling me there are only three men who match up." I was actually getting a bit pissed off at this point as we checked out their profiles. One was clearly older than he'd listed himself to be, another was dressed in hunting gear, the last one who was marginally good looking didn't have a single photo where he wasn't sitting in a bar.
Marie-:"Message this one."
Me-:"We're sorry, but you don't match their desired search qualities." Bar guy wanted someone who was a Catholic, the older one wanted someone under thirty, and the hunter just wanted someone in their area only.
Marie-:"Widen your search then." she literally opened her arms gesturing towards the walls.
Me-:"What part of that's all of Canada are you not understanding?"
Marie-:"The Canadian part. Expand into the states."
Me-:"And the point of that would be what now? If I can't afford to travel across the province to meet a man, how would I travel out of the country itself?"
Marie-:"Well, who says you have to travel to them?"
Me-:"I'm not going to win this am I?"
Marie-:"No, widen your search."
Wednesday, June 7, 2017
Dirty Laundry 69
I went for coffee with my friend Marie. Right off I could tell something was bothering her from the way she slumped in her seat. When I asked, she showed me a message from twitter. This guy has started to follow her on there, and he's now following everyone she is. But it bummed her out a bit.
Marie-:"Just look at what he posted." she showed me his tweet from last night. I didn't see anything wrong with it, just song lyrics. "I posted something and two minutes later he posted this." I still didn't get the bad to be honest. She continued to show me the last few weeks of posts between them. Every time she posts something, he does the same theme. She talked about the band Flock of Seagulls, he posted a cartoon of seagulls. She posted about a ring she was wanting, he talked about a piece of jewellery with the same coloured stone.
Me-:"Dude! Actions speak louder than words. He's so into you!"
Marie-:"I don't think so."
Me-:"Trust me! He is. He's making a point to get into what you're into." damn, if there was a man on this planet who wanted my attention enough to interact like that with me on instagram or youtube, I'd be listening to what his non-words were saying; not pouting over it.
While we were there, this one guy who works at the grocery store walked in. Marie turned around in her seat and started to giggle.
Marie-:"That one again." referring to the fact this guy had been in the coffee shop three times while we were there. And he stood in line, of which there wasn't one, just stood there in the middle of the building far enough away from the counter and too close to where we were sitting, just staring at us. "Oh he just turned away all red."
Me-:"Cause he saw you staring at him."
Marie-:"He's embarrassed he got caught staring at you." she had the biggest smirk on her face as he ordered his donut. We started to get up to leave, when the grocery store guy took the seat beside our's. "Do you want to stay for a few more minutes?" Marie sat back down giggling.
Me-:"I thought you needed to get home for the dogs?" I could feel him staring at us, and it caused me to blush. I ended up having to sit down again because Marie was not getting back up. The dude had sat so he was facing her direction.
Marie-:"Okay, I need a smoke so outside." and then she practically dragged me out of the building. "He was looking at you the whole time. I totally think he was trying to get the guts to ask you out!"
Me-:"He sat so you were in his direct view not me."
Marie-:"But he was looking at you. Surprised he didn't break his neck the way he was twisting it. How old you think he is?"
Me-:"I don't know? In his twenties maybe? Too young for me."
Marie-:"Age is but a number. Besides, he's not your future husband. You deserve a fling." she winked at me as she started to head towards home.
Me-:"You say that like you've seen something." I turned following her. She laughed again. "You did see something. What the hell did you see?"
She just shrugged and told me to have fun before October. Yeah, sometimes being friends with a psychic can be complicated.
Marie-:"Just look at what he posted." she showed me his tweet from last night. I didn't see anything wrong with it, just song lyrics. "I posted something and two minutes later he posted this." I still didn't get the bad to be honest. She continued to show me the last few weeks of posts between them. Every time she posts something, he does the same theme. She talked about the band Flock of Seagulls, he posted a cartoon of seagulls. She posted about a ring she was wanting, he talked about a piece of jewellery with the same coloured stone.
Me-:"Dude! Actions speak louder than words. He's so into you!"
Marie-:"I don't think so."
Me-:"Trust me! He is. He's making a point to get into what you're into." damn, if there was a man on this planet who wanted my attention enough to interact like that with me on instagram or youtube, I'd be listening to what his non-words were saying; not pouting over it.
While we were there, this one guy who works at the grocery store walked in. Marie turned around in her seat and started to giggle.
Marie-:"That one again." referring to the fact this guy had been in the coffee shop three times while we were there. And he stood in line, of which there wasn't one, just stood there in the middle of the building far enough away from the counter and too close to where we were sitting, just staring at us. "Oh he just turned away all red."
Me-:"Cause he saw you staring at him."
Marie-:"He's embarrassed he got caught staring at you." she had the biggest smirk on her face as he ordered his donut. We started to get up to leave, when the grocery store guy took the seat beside our's. "Do you want to stay for a few more minutes?" Marie sat back down giggling.
Me-:"I thought you needed to get home for the dogs?" I could feel him staring at us, and it caused me to blush. I ended up having to sit down again because Marie was not getting back up. The dude had sat so he was facing her direction.
Marie-:"Okay, I need a smoke so outside." and then she practically dragged me out of the building. "He was looking at you the whole time. I totally think he was trying to get the guts to ask you out!"
Me-:"He sat so you were in his direct view not me."
Marie-:"But he was looking at you. Surprised he didn't break his neck the way he was twisting it. How old you think he is?"
Me-:"I don't know? In his twenties maybe? Too young for me."
Marie-:"Age is but a number. Besides, he's not your future husband. You deserve a fling." she winked at me as she started to head towards home.
Me-:"You say that like you've seen something." I turned following her. She laughed again. "You did see something. What the hell did you see?"
She just shrugged and told me to have fun before October. Yeah, sometimes being friends with a psychic can be complicated.
Tuesday, April 11, 2017
Dirty Laundry 68
I was out for coffee with my friend Marie. She's one of the girls who works at the occult store here in town. And she's been trying to talk me into going with her to this convention in the fall in the states. I've been reluctant because, well that's just me. Anyways, Vegas was brought up again. While we were talking, she got a message via twitter from The Guy In Vegas, once again asking her to come out there. Now, she's shown me his photo before, but he was wearing sunglasses and a baseball cap. So didn't recognize him. Then she showed me the twitter message, and the video attached pointing him out.
Me-:"Oh my god! He's The Guy In Vegas?"
Marie-:"Yeah, why?"
Me-:"You never told me HE's the guy!" the guy - her guy, is infamous in the occult world and works for one of those reality tv shows. And dude, I've had a crush on this guy myself after seeing him in a documentary few years back. They met few years ago at one of these conventions. Needless to say, my mouth fell open and I think I started to drool even. "Damn! What is stopping you from flying out there right now?"
Marie-:"Flying. I hate flying." hence why she really wants someone to go with her. She needs to have someone pry her full of alcohol and keep her from jumping out of the plane to her death.
Me-:"Then take a bus. You need to go and like marry this dude. Now!"
Marie-:"I'll go if you go with me."
Me-:"You do realize the second you hook up with this guy you're going to want to stay there."
Marie-:"No I won't."
Me-:"Yes you will."
Marie-:"Yes I will." she went five shades of red in about two seconds. "So you'll go with me?"
Me-:"Maybe."
Me-:"Oh my god! He's The Guy In Vegas?"
Marie-:"Yeah, why?"
Me-:"You never told me HE's the guy!" the guy - her guy, is infamous in the occult world and works for one of those reality tv shows. And dude, I've had a crush on this guy myself after seeing him in a documentary few years back. They met few years ago at one of these conventions. Needless to say, my mouth fell open and I think I started to drool even. "Damn! What is stopping you from flying out there right now?"
Marie-:"Flying. I hate flying." hence why she really wants someone to go with her. She needs to have someone pry her full of alcohol and keep her from jumping out of the plane to her death.
Me-:"Then take a bus. You need to go and like marry this dude. Now!"
Marie-:"I'll go if you go with me."
Me-:"You do realize the second you hook up with this guy you're going to want to stay there."
Marie-:"No I won't."
Me-:"Yes you will."
Marie-:"Yes I will." she went five shades of red in about two seconds. "So you'll go with me?"
Me-:"Maybe."
Saturday, February 25, 2017
Dirty Laundry 67
I just got a message from Marie asking me if I knew who the new tarot reader at the cafe was? I didn't. Have to admit, little bit hurt to learn they hired someone new. Could be why my ears have been burning for the last 3 days, not too sure. Could also be why I feel like something has shifted last few days. At first, I thought it was just where the temperature has jumped and the pressure has dropped. But, it would seem it's something more than just that.
I just finished reading a book, one that I had read 20 years ago. Found myself crying a lot for some unknown reason while reading it this time. It's not particularly a sad story, but for whatever reason, this time around it really got to me?
And if you're wondering, no I never did hear from Yoga Guy. Then again, I wasn't putting any stock into it. Not to say it wouldn't have been nice to finally get back off the shelf, but I knew the second Pussycat told me he'd tried to play cupid that nothing would come of it. Love him to death, he's got a good heart. But really crappy taste in men.
Jane Austen once said "for a woman to find the perfect guy, she has to write him herself". Fits right in with my Frankenstein themes. Would you be shocked to know that I can't even hear myself think right now because I've got my music blasting in my ear phones? Have to, the neighbour's on the other side of my kitchen wall, are going at it like rabid dogs. Seriously, I guess someone took the blue pills instead of the red.
I just finished reading a book, one that I had read 20 years ago. Found myself crying a lot for some unknown reason while reading it this time. It's not particularly a sad story, but for whatever reason, this time around it really got to me?
And if you're wondering, no I never did hear from Yoga Guy. Then again, I wasn't putting any stock into it. Not to say it wouldn't have been nice to finally get back off the shelf, but I knew the second Pussycat told me he'd tried to play cupid that nothing would come of it. Love him to death, he's got a good heart. But really crappy taste in men.
Jane Austen once said "for a woman to find the perfect guy, she has to write him herself". Fits right in with my Frankenstein themes. Would you be shocked to know that I can't even hear myself think right now because I've got my music blasting in my ear phones? Have to, the neighbour's on the other side of my kitchen wall, are going at it like rabid dogs. Seriously, I guess someone took the blue pills instead of the red.
Wednesday, February 22, 2017
Dirty Laundry 66
Pussycat-:"Tell me how it went with Yoga Guy?"
Me-:"He never messaged."
Pussycat-:"Really? I'm sure he will still."
Me-:"Okay sure."
That's how my morning started. Smooth when you think about it. Then, Marie messaged, asking me if I've had any issues with facebook lately?
Me-:"Haven't been in there in months. Can't say."
Marie-:"Can you please? I'm having issues with messages in there. I sent one to buddy and he hasn't answered. I need to know it's working."
So I did. Everything ended up being fine, the message to her went through, her message back to me went through. Smooth right. Yeah.
Me-:"Why wouldn't he be answering? You get into a fight?"
Marie-:"No. Don't know?"
Me-:"Has he asked you yet this week about going to Vegas?" This guy lives there, and about three times a week, he tries to convince her to join him.
Marie-:"lol"
Me-:"I'll take that as a yes. Why do you keep turning him down? He's going to stop asking soon."
Marie-:"Everything in it's divine time remember."
Me-:"Yeah, well I've got no mind for being patient."
Marie-:"So tell me about your guy?"
Me-:"What guy? You been chatting with Pussycat?"
Marie-:"No. Why what's going on there?"
Me-:"Nothing. He's been playing cupid so nothing."
Marie-:"No, I mean the one I saw the other week for you. The one with the light hair and the pink and yellow."
So this was one of those random moments Marie, who is a witch/medium was referring to. I'm lucky to be accurate once out of twenty when I get those random tarot moments. But Marie, she's scoring 100% every time. This happened about two weeks ago, we were talking about her daughter in law, when she just started giggling and snorting back a laugh pointed at me and declared "there's a new guy, yellow and pink and he's got light coloured hair. Pay attention." Which, of course could mean anything. So I'm suppose to be on the watch for a guy with either light brown hair or dark blonde hair or red hair or white hair or dyed pink and yellow for all I know?
Me-:"Nothing. I'm starting to think that all the straight single men on the planet have been vacuumed up into oblivion."
Marie-:"This new guy, he's a keeper so keep an eye open."
Me-:"Eye open for a flamingo got it"
Me-:"He never messaged."
Pussycat-:"Really? I'm sure he will still."
Me-:"Okay sure."
That's how my morning started. Smooth when you think about it. Then, Marie messaged, asking me if I've had any issues with facebook lately?
Me-:"Haven't been in there in months. Can't say."
Marie-:"Can you please? I'm having issues with messages in there. I sent one to buddy and he hasn't answered. I need to know it's working."
So I did. Everything ended up being fine, the message to her went through, her message back to me went through. Smooth right. Yeah.
Me-:"Why wouldn't he be answering? You get into a fight?"
Marie-:"No. Don't know?"
Me-:"Has he asked you yet this week about going to Vegas?" This guy lives there, and about three times a week, he tries to convince her to join him.
Marie-:"lol"
Me-:"I'll take that as a yes. Why do you keep turning him down? He's going to stop asking soon."
Marie-:"Everything in it's divine time remember."
Me-:"Yeah, well I've got no mind for being patient."
Marie-:"So tell me about your guy?"
Me-:"What guy? You been chatting with Pussycat?"
Marie-:"No. Why what's going on there?"
Me-:"Nothing. He's been playing cupid so nothing."
Marie-:"No, I mean the one I saw the other week for you. The one with the light hair and the pink and yellow."
So this was one of those random moments Marie, who is a witch/medium was referring to. I'm lucky to be accurate once out of twenty when I get those random tarot moments. But Marie, she's scoring 100% every time. This happened about two weeks ago, we were talking about her daughter in law, when she just started giggling and snorting back a laugh pointed at me and declared "there's a new guy, yellow and pink and he's got light coloured hair. Pay attention." Which, of course could mean anything. So I'm suppose to be on the watch for a guy with either light brown hair or dark blonde hair or red hair or white hair or dyed pink and yellow for all I know?
Me-:"Nothing. I'm starting to think that all the straight single men on the planet have been vacuumed up into oblivion."
Marie-:"This new guy, he's a keeper so keep an eye open."
Me-:"Eye open for a flamingo got it"
Monday, February 20, 2017
Dirty Laundry 65
My phone rang. Scared the life out of me cause other than my mother, everyone else texts. So it rang, and the caller id said it was the hospital. I went to full on panic mode. Ended up being Pussycat.
Me-:"What happened?"
Pussycat-:"What. Nothing, lost my phone so stopped in here to use the phone. Oh my god, I couldn't even think where to go to find a phone anymore. They need to bring back phone booths for when stuff like this happens."
Me-:"You bastard! What do you want?"
Pussycat-:"I met a guy!"
Me-:"The guy from Valentine's?"
Pussycat-:"What? No doll, not him he's done. Done had and no repeats remember. No I mean I met a guy for you."
Me-:"I'm not interested." as much as I love Pussycat, I'm not sure I want to trust his taste in men. Which is sad, cause if he were straight, I'd be totally after him. Yeah, dude, that's messed up I know. The irony is not totally lost on me.
Pussycat-:"You know it cost 75 cents for this call? Oh my god, I remember when it was 10 cents for local calls."
Me-:"Well, like you said no one needs phone booths anymore."
Pussycat-:"Well, they should. Make it so much easier for when you loose your phone. But, you need to meet this guy, he's perfect for you. He's a bartender..."
Me-:"I'm not interested."
Pussycat-:"Shut up and listen. He's a bartender, met him in my yoga class. Girl! The ass on him was like a big slab of butter! I wanted to cry his ass was perfect! Like that guy from that superhero movie the British guy Cubberbutt or what is his name?"
Me-:"Benedict Cumberbatch."
Pussycat-:"Yeah that guy. He's hot."
Me-:"Yes he is. His butt is little on the flat side for me but...all puns intended."
Pussycat-:"Well I think it's perfect. Anyways, he's got a beard, long dark hair..."
Me-:"I'm really not interested. No seriously, I hate long hair on men. I'm not overly thrilled with beards either."
Pussycat-:"He's just gotten divorced..."
Me-:"I don't date divorced men either. Give up. Thanks for thinking of me, but everything you just listed, I've dated before. Like, broken my own rules gone against my gut instincts and massively regretted it; dated before. I'm grateful you thought of me when you saw him, but he's not my type in anyway."
Pussycat-:"Okay miss thang. Miss king shit. What then is your type?"
Me-:"For starters, short hair. And I mean short hair, like if it's at the collar it's too long. Clean shaven, thick thighs. Bit of a tummy, chest hair. Men who look like their age you know. I don't want to be with a guy wondering if I should be blowing him or burping him. That too smooth skinned waxing thing men do way too often is a turn off." when guys are like walking skeletons that's a turn off too. I've lost a lot of weight in the last year, but I have this thing about being with men who's thighs are at lest as large as my own.
Pussycat-:"The Salesman had a beard."
Me-:"Not when I first met him he didn't. And he only had the beard for like a month before he shaved it off again."
Pussycat-:"Well, pretend to be interested because I gave him your number told him to text you."
Me-:"What happened?"
Pussycat-:"What. Nothing, lost my phone so stopped in here to use the phone. Oh my god, I couldn't even think where to go to find a phone anymore. They need to bring back phone booths for when stuff like this happens."
Me-:"You bastard! What do you want?"
Pussycat-:"I met a guy!"
Me-:"The guy from Valentine's?"
Pussycat-:"What? No doll, not him he's done. Done had and no repeats remember. No I mean I met a guy for you."
Me-:"I'm not interested." as much as I love Pussycat, I'm not sure I want to trust his taste in men. Which is sad, cause if he were straight, I'd be totally after him. Yeah, dude, that's messed up I know. The irony is not totally lost on me.
Pussycat-:"You know it cost 75 cents for this call? Oh my god, I remember when it was 10 cents for local calls."
Me-:"Well, like you said no one needs phone booths anymore."
Pussycat-:"Well, they should. Make it so much easier for when you loose your phone. But, you need to meet this guy, he's perfect for you. He's a bartender..."
Me-:"I'm not interested."
Pussycat-:"Shut up and listen. He's a bartender, met him in my yoga class. Girl! The ass on him was like a big slab of butter! I wanted to cry his ass was perfect! Like that guy from that superhero movie the British guy Cubberbutt or what is his name?"
Me-:"Benedict Cumberbatch."
Pussycat-:"Yeah that guy. He's hot."
Me-:"Yes he is. His butt is little on the flat side for me but...all puns intended."
Pussycat-:"Well I think it's perfect. Anyways, he's got a beard, long dark hair..."
Me-:"I'm really not interested. No seriously, I hate long hair on men. I'm not overly thrilled with beards either."
Pussycat-:"He's just gotten divorced..."
Me-:"I don't date divorced men either. Give up. Thanks for thinking of me, but everything you just listed, I've dated before. Like, broken my own rules gone against my gut instincts and massively regretted it; dated before. I'm grateful you thought of me when you saw him, but he's not my type in anyway."
Pussycat-:"Okay miss thang. Miss king shit. What then is your type?"
Me-:"For starters, short hair. And I mean short hair, like if it's at the collar it's too long. Clean shaven, thick thighs. Bit of a tummy, chest hair. Men who look like their age you know. I don't want to be with a guy wondering if I should be blowing him or burping him. That too smooth skinned waxing thing men do way too often is a turn off." when guys are like walking skeletons that's a turn off too. I've lost a lot of weight in the last year, but I have this thing about being with men who's thighs are at lest as large as my own.
Pussycat-:"The Salesman had a beard."
Me-:"Not when I first met him he didn't. And he only had the beard for like a month before he shaved it off again."
Pussycat-:"Well, pretend to be interested because I gave him your number told him to text you."
Tuesday, February 14, 2017
Dirty Laundry 64
Pussycat was drunk when he called me. Yes, called me. Not texted, but actually phoned. That's how drunk he was.
Pussycat-:"What's your perfect man?"
Me-:"Don't you mean who?"
Pussycat-:"No. what? I'm going to find you someone tonight! Girl!"
Me-:"I'll believe that when I see it. Where are you? I thought you were on a date?"
Pussycat-:"Later, later not till he gets off work. I'm with my girls." he actually meant his drag queen friends. When he's with actual female friends he calls them by their names. "Pub crawling doll. Tell me!"
Me-:"God, I don't even know anymore."
Pussycat-:"We're going to the next one now cause, it's all good baby. I've got your instagram up dolly. I'm going to be your fairy godmother get it. Fairy. I'm your fairy god drag mother." he mumbled something I couldn't catch and ended the call.
Here's the thing about Valentine's Day. Most people don't realize it started off as a pagan fertility rite. Names would be put into a bucket or bowl or what have you, and people would randomly draw a name, then go off and have sex. So if a half dozen couples had been trying for a long time to have kids, and nothing was working, this was their chance to see who was the cause of not having kids, without cheating. Really romantic right? Some places used masks instead of the draw. Which is where part of the whole masquerade ball came from. Party goers would have these elaborate masks and without knowing who, they would hook up with someone. Good in some ways I suppose, bad in others. And lets not forget the fact, the sex rites were to make sure the crops were good for the coming year. Sex magick is still the best way to add energy to a spell.
Pussycat called back shortly after 8pm. Again, asking me what my ideal man would be. Again, mumbling something and having the call end. I think he was trying to show people photos while still trying to talk on the phone? Yeah, like I said, he's already drunk. Which is sad in itself. When I met him, he had been two years sober. Now, he's toasted a lot.
So while he's being him tonight, I'm sitting here listening to the neighbours sneak into the hallway, and talk to the people they are having affairs with, or the girlfriends they have out of town, while the other neighbours fight over what restaurant they are going to, and why they feel disappointed by the lack of attention. Etc, etc, etc.
He called again while I was typing this.
Me-:"Norman Reedus. I like guys who look like Norman Reedus." well, doesn't everyone? He wouldn't know who any of my wrestlers are so there isn't a point in telling him.
Pussycat-:"What's your perfect man?"
Me-:"Don't you mean who?"
Pussycat-:"No. what? I'm going to find you someone tonight! Girl!"
Me-:"I'll believe that when I see it. Where are you? I thought you were on a date?"
Pussycat-:"Later, later not till he gets off work. I'm with my girls." he actually meant his drag queen friends. When he's with actual female friends he calls them by their names. "Pub crawling doll. Tell me!"
Me-:"God, I don't even know anymore."
Pussycat-:"We're going to the next one now cause, it's all good baby. I've got your instagram up dolly. I'm going to be your fairy godmother get it. Fairy. I'm your fairy god drag mother." he mumbled something I couldn't catch and ended the call.
Here's the thing about Valentine's Day. Most people don't realize it started off as a pagan fertility rite. Names would be put into a bucket or bowl or what have you, and people would randomly draw a name, then go off and have sex. So if a half dozen couples had been trying for a long time to have kids, and nothing was working, this was their chance to see who was the cause of not having kids, without cheating. Really romantic right? Some places used masks instead of the draw. Which is where part of the whole masquerade ball came from. Party goers would have these elaborate masks and without knowing who, they would hook up with someone. Good in some ways I suppose, bad in others. And lets not forget the fact, the sex rites were to make sure the crops were good for the coming year. Sex magick is still the best way to add energy to a spell.
Pussycat called back shortly after 8pm. Again, asking me what my ideal man would be. Again, mumbling something and having the call end. I think he was trying to show people photos while still trying to talk on the phone? Yeah, like I said, he's already drunk. Which is sad in itself. When I met him, he had been two years sober. Now, he's toasted a lot.
So while he's being him tonight, I'm sitting here listening to the neighbours sneak into the hallway, and talk to the people they are having affairs with, or the girlfriends they have out of town, while the other neighbours fight over what restaurant they are going to, and why they feel disappointed by the lack of attention. Etc, etc, etc.
He called again while I was typing this.
Me-:"Norman Reedus. I like guys who look like Norman Reedus." well, doesn't everyone? He wouldn't know who any of my wrestlers are so there isn't a point in telling him.
Thursday, February 9, 2017
Dirty Laundry 63
It's been one of those days again, where I couldn't keep up with the texting. I got a message from my cousin Walsh asking me if I was okay.
Me-:"Yeah, why?"
Walsh-:"My mom said you fell. What happened?"
Me-:"For once nothing. Wasn't me it for once. It was my sister. She was walking their dog and slipped on a patch of ice. Broke her tailbone and tore up her knee."
Walsh-:"Damn eh? She needing surgery?"
Me-:"Not sure yet. The doctors told her to come back in a couple of days when some of the swelling has gone down, cause the x-rays weren't clear."
I barely managed to sit down with my coffee when I got a text from Pussycat.
Pussycat-:"The Salesman was asking about you!"
Me-:"Oh? When was this?"
Pussycat-:"This morning. I bumped into him at the fancy tea place in the mall."
Me-:"Yeah, I bumped into him last week too while I was there. What was he saying?"
Pussycat-:"Asked how often you go to the occult shop and when you might be there again. He's so still interested!"
Me-:"Have you ever actually seen him there? Cause I haven't. Like ever."
Pussycat-:"No haven't either."
When I had bumped into him last week, I commented on a necklace he was wearing, mentioning I'd seen something similar at the occult shop. The Salesman told me he hung out there all the time. But I've never seen him there. Nor has any of the staff mentioned seeing him. They are starting to play matchmaker, and last few times a new guy has come through the shop, they've messaged me. The Salesman has never been on their radar.
Pussycat-:"I told him you should be there on the weekend."
Me-:"What you do that for?"
Pussycat-:"Cause doll, he likes you"
Me-:"Then why not just ask me out the other day? Or ask for my number?"
Pussycat-:"No idea. But go find out."
I couldn't get the whole thing off my mind all day. I haven't thought about The Salesman in months, and suddenly he's popping up like weeds. I texted my cousin Walsh.
Me-:"Do you think I should bother with The Salesman again?"
Walsh-:"No."
Me-:"Okay, why?"
Walsh-:"Just a gut reaction."
Me-:"Can you explain that?"
Walsh-:"Not really."
Me-:"Big help thanks."
Walsh-:"You asked."
I have to admit, I need to know, when I walk into a room, the guy I'm there to see is happy I'm there. To actually see that look where I know the guy is having that butterfly moment, because he's near giddiness that I'm there. The Salesman doesn't do that for me.
Me-:"Yeah, why?"
Walsh-:"My mom said you fell. What happened?"
Me-:"For once nothing. Wasn't me it for once. It was my sister. She was walking their dog and slipped on a patch of ice. Broke her tailbone and tore up her knee."
Walsh-:"Damn eh? She needing surgery?"
Me-:"Not sure yet. The doctors told her to come back in a couple of days when some of the swelling has gone down, cause the x-rays weren't clear."
I barely managed to sit down with my coffee when I got a text from Pussycat.
Pussycat-:"The Salesman was asking about you!"
Me-:"Oh? When was this?"
Pussycat-:"This morning. I bumped into him at the fancy tea place in the mall."
Me-:"Yeah, I bumped into him last week too while I was there. What was he saying?"
Pussycat-:"Asked how often you go to the occult shop and when you might be there again. He's so still interested!"
Me-:"Have you ever actually seen him there? Cause I haven't. Like ever."
Pussycat-:"No haven't either."
When I had bumped into him last week, I commented on a necklace he was wearing, mentioning I'd seen something similar at the occult shop. The Salesman told me he hung out there all the time. But I've never seen him there. Nor has any of the staff mentioned seeing him. They are starting to play matchmaker, and last few times a new guy has come through the shop, they've messaged me. The Salesman has never been on their radar.
Pussycat-:"I told him you should be there on the weekend."
Me-:"What you do that for?"
Pussycat-:"Cause doll, he likes you"
Me-:"Then why not just ask me out the other day? Or ask for my number?"
Pussycat-:"No idea. But go find out."
I couldn't get the whole thing off my mind all day. I haven't thought about The Salesman in months, and suddenly he's popping up like weeds. I texted my cousin Walsh.
Me-:"Do you think I should bother with The Salesman again?"
Walsh-:"No."
Me-:"Okay, why?"
Walsh-:"Just a gut reaction."
Me-:"Can you explain that?"
Walsh-:"Not really."
Me-:"Big help thanks."
Walsh-:"You asked."
I have to admit, I need to know, when I walk into a room, the guy I'm there to see is happy I'm there. To actually see that look where I know the guy is having that butterfly moment, because he's near giddiness that I'm there. The Salesman doesn't do that for me.
Friday, January 27, 2017
Dirty Laundry 62
Just got a text from my cousin Walsh, "What did you think?"
Me-:"What am I thinking about?"
Walsh-:"The show last night."
Me-:"What show?"
Walsh-:"Company Two."
Me-:"Haven't watched it in months. Why?"
Walsh-:"New Fav was on."
Me-:"Brilliant, why'd you not tell me when the show was on?"
Walsh-:"Thought you were watching it."
Me-:"No, gave up on all of it months ago. Last wrestling I watched was New Company back like October. Was actually thinking about getting rid of my sports package cause there's no indication New Company will be back on Canadian tv."
Walsh-:"There's a replay tomorrow." he was meaning Company Two
Me-:"Thanks. At lest that will help with the fairy tale and maybe keep the writer's block away."
Walsh-:"I told you, they have a youtube." he was meaning New Company.
Me-:"Yeah, and I think I've seen the one promo of his like 30 times now. There's only so much storyline I can squeeze out of a 45 second promo."
Walsh-:"hahaha! Well there you go. He's back on Canadian tv."
Me-:"What am I thinking about?"
Walsh-:"The show last night."
Me-:"What show?"
Walsh-:"Company Two."
Me-:"Haven't watched it in months. Why?"
Walsh-:"New Fav was on."
Me-:"Brilliant, why'd you not tell me when the show was on?"
Walsh-:"Thought you were watching it."
Me-:"No, gave up on all of it months ago. Last wrestling I watched was New Company back like October. Was actually thinking about getting rid of my sports package cause there's no indication New Company will be back on Canadian tv."
Walsh-:"There's a replay tomorrow." he was meaning Company Two
Me-:"Thanks. At lest that will help with the fairy tale and maybe keep the writer's block away."
Walsh-:"I told you, they have a youtube." he was meaning New Company.
Me-:"Yeah, and I think I've seen the one promo of his like 30 times now. There's only so much storyline I can squeeze out of a 45 second promo."
Walsh-:"hahaha! Well there you go. He's back on Canadian tv."
Friday, October 7, 2016
Dirty Laundry 61
Pussycat-:"Remember, Pluto has shifted and now it's all going to be death and rebirth."
Me-:"It's gone direct. It's been retro most of the year."
Pussycat-:"That's what I said, it's gone direct. hahaha!" We were talking about the general crappiness of the last week. "But that is odd."
I had told him about running into my ex yet again, not once but twice today. The first time I was standing outside freezing to death waiting for a bus, and the second time was about four hours later when I was slugging groceries home.
Me-:"Yeah, it's been all safe since that first day the other month, like I actually thought he'd moved again. Then poof, two times today."
Pussycat-:"Did he say anything? Do anything?"
Me-:"He spotted me the first time, he was like ten feet away pulling out of the parking lot, looked right at me, adjusted his mirror and then fixed his hair. Like he was wearing a hoodie and pushed the hood down, finger combing his hair and looked at me a few times before moving on. There was no traffic for him to be needing to linger on the edge of the street. Then later on, he literally cut me off by two bloody feet when I was returning with my five hundred bags of groceries. I just don't get it? Why? After all this time, twice I see him in a matter of hours."
Pussycat-:" Oh girrrrlll! Hit that! He was making himself pretty for you! I said it before he's still thinking of you if you know what I mean."
Me-:"I don't need that in my mind. And he's like the biggest whore in town. But I've been racking my brains all day trying to figure out why the universe keeps dropping the ass in my lap like this? I think we should do a final removal spell. Just when I start getting comfortable and happy-ish; poof there he is."
Pussycat-:"Yeah that's bit on the shady side. Is it possible that he did it on purpose?"
Me-:"What move in to my building?"
Pussycat-:"hahahaha! No doll, happen to be there the second time today? Like, maybe after he saw you the first time, he just circled around all day waiting?"
I was about to say that my ex isn't that smooth, that he was never the type to lounge around after a woman, but I stopped myself. I stopped myself because I did not want to defend him in anyway.
Pussycat-:"What if the universe didn't do it to you? What if the universe keeps dropping you into his lap because he's got stuff he needs to work through? Ever think of that?"
To be honest, no I did not. I was trying not to think about anything. In fact, I had a couple of episodes of the New Company in the machine from the past month, and randomly picked one for a distraction, just as background noise.
Pussycat-:"What colour is his hair?"
Me-:"Dark brown nearly jet black natural. Why?"
Pussycat-:"What if he's the guy the tarots have been talking about? Have you thought about that? The Knight of Cups?"
Me-:"Knight of Cups is light brown to blonde hair, with blue eyes and pale skin. My ex has dark brown eyes and badly tanned skin. Practically orange at times. Not him thank god."
Looking at the tv screen, I realized I don't care for the conservative look my New Favourite has been sporting last few episodes. I liked the hairdo he had few months ago, when he was a few pounds heavier in the tummy and before he waxed everything. He's starting to look too much like every other wrestler out there.
Pussycat-:"The fact he did show up the second time just as you were coming back from being gone all day, that's not just coincidence. He was looking to have you see him doll. Feel free to love it! Love it doll, he was waiting for you to get home I'm sure of it."
I sat there staring at the tv screen, rewinding the end of the match as my New Favourite was screaming at the camera man, practically spitting everywhere, trying to read lips, as I had it muted. Refusing to let any of what Pussycat was hinting at infect my brain for the night, I made plans with him for after the weekend, cause god forbid you get between a drag queen and the weekend; made a coffee and sat down to work on the fairy tale. But instead, I ended up writing out this post. With the tv screen still on pause, wondering just how many cameras get mucked over by the wrestlers spitting when the ringside cameraman gets too close?
Me-:"It's gone direct. It's been retro most of the year."
Pussycat-:"That's what I said, it's gone direct. hahaha!" We were talking about the general crappiness of the last week. "But that is odd."
I had told him about running into my ex yet again, not once but twice today. The first time I was standing outside freezing to death waiting for a bus, and the second time was about four hours later when I was slugging groceries home.
Me-:"Yeah, it's been all safe since that first day the other month, like I actually thought he'd moved again. Then poof, two times today."
Pussycat-:"Did he say anything? Do anything?"
Me-:"He spotted me the first time, he was like ten feet away pulling out of the parking lot, looked right at me, adjusted his mirror and then fixed his hair. Like he was wearing a hoodie and pushed the hood down, finger combing his hair and looked at me a few times before moving on. There was no traffic for him to be needing to linger on the edge of the street. Then later on, he literally cut me off by two bloody feet when I was returning with my five hundred bags of groceries. I just don't get it? Why? After all this time, twice I see him in a matter of hours."
Pussycat-:" Oh girrrrlll! Hit that! He was making himself pretty for you! I said it before he's still thinking of you if you know what I mean."
Me-:"I don't need that in my mind. And he's like the biggest whore in town. But I've been racking my brains all day trying to figure out why the universe keeps dropping the ass in my lap like this? I think we should do a final removal spell. Just when I start getting comfortable and happy-ish; poof there he is."
Pussycat-:"Yeah that's bit on the shady side. Is it possible that he did it on purpose?"
Me-:"What move in to my building?"
Pussycat-:"hahahaha! No doll, happen to be there the second time today? Like, maybe after he saw you the first time, he just circled around all day waiting?"
I was about to say that my ex isn't that smooth, that he was never the type to lounge around after a woman, but I stopped myself. I stopped myself because I did not want to defend him in anyway.
Pussycat-:"What if the universe didn't do it to you? What if the universe keeps dropping you into his lap because he's got stuff he needs to work through? Ever think of that?"
To be honest, no I did not. I was trying not to think about anything. In fact, I had a couple of episodes of the New Company in the machine from the past month, and randomly picked one for a distraction, just as background noise.
Pussycat-:"What colour is his hair?"
Me-:"Dark brown nearly jet black natural. Why?"
Pussycat-:"What if he's the guy the tarots have been talking about? Have you thought about that? The Knight of Cups?"
Me-:"Knight of Cups is light brown to blonde hair, with blue eyes and pale skin. My ex has dark brown eyes and badly tanned skin. Practically orange at times. Not him thank god."
Looking at the tv screen, I realized I don't care for the conservative look my New Favourite has been sporting last few episodes. I liked the hairdo he had few months ago, when he was a few pounds heavier in the tummy and before he waxed everything. He's starting to look too much like every other wrestler out there.
Pussycat-:"The fact he did show up the second time just as you were coming back from being gone all day, that's not just coincidence. He was looking to have you see him doll. Feel free to love it! Love it doll, he was waiting for you to get home I'm sure of it."
I sat there staring at the tv screen, rewinding the end of the match as my New Favourite was screaming at the camera man, practically spitting everywhere, trying to read lips, as I had it muted. Refusing to let any of what Pussycat was hinting at infect my brain for the night, I made plans with him for after the weekend, cause god forbid you get between a drag queen and the weekend; made a coffee and sat down to work on the fairy tale. But instead, I ended up writing out this post. With the tv screen still on pause, wondering just how many cameras get mucked over by the wrestlers spitting when the ringside cameraman gets too close?
Friday, September 2, 2016
Dirty Laundry 60
I got a text from Pussycat this morning letting me know I'm booked for readings tomorrow at the cafe.
Me-:"Cool. Am I scary? I know I'm not pretty, but am I scary? I was on my way to the store and this car was chugging along beside me, plenty of room for him to get around but, when I looked, he sped off like the devil was in his pants."
Pussycat-:" No doll not scary. Maybe he was just being creepy and when you noticed he freaked?"
Me-:"He was staring...it almost looked like the Salesman. But not too sure."
Pussycat-:"I tagged you on the thing for tomorrow. Waaa? Oh nice. Did you see the post, I can't find it anymore?"
Me-:"No."
Pussycat-:"Reposted, my phone has been doing strange things."
Me-:"Mercury went retrograde."
Pussycat-:"Ahhh. That explains a lot. He was just probably freaked because you caught him looking. Maybe it was the Salesman and he was checking you out?"
Me-:"Then why not say hey?"
Pussycat-:"Maybe because he's a creeper? But doll you're not scary. You could use some more make-up once and a while but not scary. You're a wickedly wonderful witch! Not a pilgrim."
Me-:"Cool. Am I scary? I know I'm not pretty, but am I scary? I was on my way to the store and this car was chugging along beside me, plenty of room for him to get around but, when I looked, he sped off like the devil was in his pants."
Pussycat-:" No doll not scary. Maybe he was just being creepy and when you noticed he freaked?"
Me-:"He was staring...it almost looked like the Salesman. But not too sure."
Pussycat-:"I tagged you on the thing for tomorrow. Waaa? Oh nice. Did you see the post, I can't find it anymore?"
Me-:"No."
Pussycat-:"Reposted, my phone has been doing strange things."
Me-:"Mercury went retrograde."
Pussycat-:"Ahhh. That explains a lot. He was just probably freaked because you caught him looking. Maybe it was the Salesman and he was checking you out?"
Me-:"Then why not say hey?"
Pussycat-:"Maybe because he's a creeper? But doll you're not scary. You could use some more make-up once and a while but not scary. You're a wickedly wonderful witch! Not a pilgrim."
Tuesday, August 23, 2016
Dirty Laundry 59
I got a text from Pussycat-:"You friends with Chai-Chai?"
I stood there staring at the text racking my brains as to who he was talking about. Then I realized he meant one of the ones from our witchy group. "I've chatted with her on the online group why?"
Pussycat-:"She can't stop talking about you."
Me-:"Would explain why my ears have been burning today. Now who'd I piss off?"
Pussycat-:"No I mean she can't stop talking about you! You need to tell her you're straight like right now."
Oh crap! "How does she not know? I even talked about my hot East Indian neighbour who always smells like fresh mint, and sometimes helps me with my groceries."
Pussycat-:"Don't know, don't care take care of it! She thinks you two are going out next week."
Me-:"Hang on. What? The group ritual thing?"
Pussycat-:"What group ritual thing?"
Me-:"The New Moon ritual thing."
Pussycat-:"Isn't one this month. Kiki has to work can't host it. It's been cancelled."
Balls! "You remember you offered to do that spell the other week. Did you? To help get us men?"
Pussycat-:"Yeah. Worked for me I've had three sleepovers with Nathan since" he went silent for a few minutes then sent me a facebook message. "phone died. I used the candles you gave me from the gift basket, the herbs Nathan gave me and the large amethyst that Chai-Chai gave me." he went silent again. "Oooooohhhhh girl! Okay I'll fix it. My bad. love you doll."
Yeah, thanks man. Like my life isn't crappy enough as it is. Now I've got misguided cupids mucking it all up. There are seriously days when I wish I had just let my dad's uncle set me up in an arranged marriage back when I was 15 to his adopted son. But then, I wouldn't be me. I'd be some poorly treated housewife to a raging alcoholic in Rotterdam. Much better to be single and depressed then you know, dead.
I stood there staring at the text racking my brains as to who he was talking about. Then I realized he meant one of the ones from our witchy group. "I've chatted with her on the online group why?"
Pussycat-:"She can't stop talking about you."
Me-:"Would explain why my ears have been burning today. Now who'd I piss off?"
Pussycat-:"No I mean she can't stop talking about you! You need to tell her you're straight like right now."
Oh crap! "How does she not know? I even talked about my hot East Indian neighbour who always smells like fresh mint, and sometimes helps me with my groceries."
Pussycat-:"Don't know, don't care take care of it! She thinks you two are going out next week."
Me-:"Hang on. What? The group ritual thing?"
Pussycat-:"What group ritual thing?"
Me-:"The New Moon ritual thing."
Pussycat-:"Isn't one this month. Kiki has to work can't host it. It's been cancelled."
Balls! "You remember you offered to do that spell the other week. Did you? To help get us men?"
Pussycat-:"Yeah. Worked for me I've had three sleepovers with Nathan since" he went silent for a few minutes then sent me a facebook message. "phone died. I used the candles you gave me from the gift basket, the herbs Nathan gave me and the large amethyst that Chai-Chai gave me." he went silent again. "Oooooohhhhh girl! Okay I'll fix it. My bad. love you doll."
Yeah, thanks man. Like my life isn't crappy enough as it is. Now I've got misguided cupids mucking it all up. There are seriously days when I wish I had just let my dad's uncle set me up in an arranged marriage back when I was 15 to his adopted son. But then, I wouldn't be me. I'd be some poorly treated housewife to a raging alcoholic in Rotterdam. Much better to be single and depressed then you know, dead.
Monday, August 15, 2016
Dirty Laundry 58
You know how they say when it rains it pours. Okay, so my normally hermit life was uncharacteristically busy today. Started with a text from my cousin Walsh. "Did you tape the show?"
Me-:"Which show?"
Walsh-:"The one on yesterday morning."
Me-:"Dude, there were like five different wrestling shows on yesterday, which one?"
Walsh-:"The New Company. Did you tape it?"
Me-:"Yeah, why?"
Walsh-:"Do you still have it in the machine?"
Me-:"So far."
Walsh-:"Okay put on New Favourite's match...tell me something, his tights why do I think I've seen that design before?"
I got a message from Pussycat interrupting me for a few minutes. "So how did it go with The Salesman?"
Me to Pussycat-:"It didn't."
Pussycat-:"What!!!!!"
Me to Pussycat-:"It didn't."
Me to Walsh-:"Have you been to the New Company's website yet? His tights look a lot like their background design."
Pussycat-:"Tell me everything that happened blow by blow, and I mean it!"
Walsh-:"hahahahahahaha! What a dork."
Me to Walsh-:"You asked."
Me to Pussycat-:"I went there, asked him and..." another texted came in from one of the girls that works at the occult shop here in town.
Keira-:"Hey, how's your weekend? Little bird told me you had a date. How'd it go?"
Me to Keira-:"No, bird lied."
Keira-:"Oh? What happened?"
Me to Pussycat-:"Um, you've been talking to Keira today?"
Me to Keira-:"I went to see The Salesman, asked him for coffee he spent ten minutes telling me why he couldn't then turned around and said he'd love to sometime."
Keira-:"WTF?"
Me to Keira-:"I know right?"
Pussycat-:"Um maybe. So what happened?"
Me to Pussycat-:"I went to see him, he was his normal flirty self, I asked him for coffee, he got weird said no then said sure. I have no idea if that was a rejection or not?"
Pussycat-:"Or not lol. But you went for it. That's fab. Now you can stop wondering and move on. It is perfect doll."
Okay so for the past year, this one guy who works at one of my favourite stores here in town, has been overly flirty. There have even been times he's pushed his coworkers out of the way to be the one to help me. I for once, did not think on it, assuming he was flirting to sell more crap. One of the times I went there with Pussycat, he was not working so we started chatting with one of the coworkers and found out, they do not get paid on commission. It's minimum wage.There was no reason for him to be jumping over them to get to me. The next time I went in and The Salesman was working, Pussycat was with me again, and The Salesman made it a point to come over to where we were and just say hi. That was a few months ago. As I said, this has been going on for just over a year. The last few times, his coworkers have just wandered off leaving us alone in the store. We've talked about a bunch of random crap, he once even started to fix displays that didn't need to be fixed just as an excuse to continue the conversation. Pussycat convinced me it was time to ask The Salesman out. As I said, it did not go smooth.
The Salesman looked at me, took a deep breath and told me he doesn't date anymore. Then went into this ten minute speech telling me that he's been bleed dry by women, loosing everything from his house to his friends to his job to his money; all the while getting angrier as he did. Then turned his shoulder towards me telling me he'd love to hang out at the coffee shop next to the store sometime and have coffee with me.
So here I am, confused as to if I should be insulted or not and wondering why he would say no if he seems to be interested?
I got a texted then from one of the other girls who works at the occult shop, Janny, "Hey, how'd it go with the guy?"
Me to Janny-:"Well not good."
Janny-:"Keira was just telling me. I walked in when she was reading your last text. Screw him."
Me-:"Obviously that's not going to happen."
Janny-:"hahaha! Okay right. Look at it this way, you have to wonder what kind of a guy he is if he's claiming that he always attracts the same type of woman? It can't be all the woman's fault? You don't need that anyways.Look at it this way, you did him a favour."
Me-:"How?"
Janny-:"Betting he has been bottling it up and needed to tell someone. If he found you comforting enough to explode on you then you triggered something in him."
I laughed for a bit on that one.
Walsh-:"There's nothing fresh there."
I was lost for a few minutes on that, as my head was spinning from the other messages.Then I realized he was talking about the wrestling website. "Yeah, I noticed. Too bad too, would like to see some pics of the Manager."
Walsh-:"So, what's up?"
Me-:"Oh my god its like telegram, telephone, telea-drag queen. And you can read about it in a few minutes."
Walsh-:"Whatever he's told you to do, do the opposite."
Me-:"Too late. Seriously, this mess is blog worthy."
Me-:"Which show?"
Walsh-:"The one on yesterday morning."
Me-:"Dude, there were like five different wrestling shows on yesterday, which one?"
Walsh-:"The New Company. Did you tape it?"
Me-:"Yeah, why?"
Walsh-:"Do you still have it in the machine?"
Me-:"So far."
Walsh-:"Okay put on New Favourite's match...tell me something, his tights why do I think I've seen that design before?"
I got a message from Pussycat interrupting me for a few minutes. "So how did it go with The Salesman?"
Me to Pussycat-:"It didn't."
Pussycat-:"What!!!!!"
Me to Pussycat-:"It didn't."
Me to Walsh-:"Have you been to the New Company's website yet? His tights look a lot like their background design."
Pussycat-:"Tell me everything that happened blow by blow, and I mean it!"
Walsh-:"hahahahahahaha! What a dork."
Me to Walsh-:"You asked."
Me to Pussycat-:"I went there, asked him and..." another texted came in from one of the girls that works at the occult shop here in town.
Keira-:"Hey, how's your weekend? Little bird told me you had a date. How'd it go?"
Me to Keira-:"No, bird lied."
Keira-:"Oh? What happened?"
Me to Pussycat-:"Um, you've been talking to Keira today?"
Me to Keira-:"I went to see The Salesman, asked him for coffee he spent ten minutes telling me why he couldn't then turned around and said he'd love to sometime."
Keira-:"WTF?"
Me to Keira-:"I know right?"
Pussycat-:"Um maybe. So what happened?"
Me to Pussycat-:"I went to see him, he was his normal flirty self, I asked him for coffee, he got weird said no then said sure. I have no idea if that was a rejection or not?"
Pussycat-:"Or not lol. But you went for it. That's fab. Now you can stop wondering and move on. It is perfect doll."
Okay so for the past year, this one guy who works at one of my favourite stores here in town, has been overly flirty. There have even been times he's pushed his coworkers out of the way to be the one to help me. I for once, did not think on it, assuming he was flirting to sell more crap. One of the times I went there with Pussycat, he was not working so we started chatting with one of the coworkers and found out, they do not get paid on commission. It's minimum wage.There was no reason for him to be jumping over them to get to me. The next time I went in and The Salesman was working, Pussycat was with me again, and The Salesman made it a point to come over to where we were and just say hi. That was a few months ago. As I said, this has been going on for just over a year. The last few times, his coworkers have just wandered off leaving us alone in the store. We've talked about a bunch of random crap, he once even started to fix displays that didn't need to be fixed just as an excuse to continue the conversation. Pussycat convinced me it was time to ask The Salesman out. As I said, it did not go smooth.
The Salesman looked at me, took a deep breath and told me he doesn't date anymore. Then went into this ten minute speech telling me that he's been bleed dry by women, loosing everything from his house to his friends to his job to his money; all the while getting angrier as he did. Then turned his shoulder towards me telling me he'd love to hang out at the coffee shop next to the store sometime and have coffee with me.
So here I am, confused as to if I should be insulted or not and wondering why he would say no if he seems to be interested?
I got a texted then from one of the other girls who works at the occult shop, Janny, "Hey, how'd it go with the guy?"
Me to Janny-:"Well not good."
Janny-:"Keira was just telling me. I walked in when she was reading your last text. Screw him."
Me-:"Obviously that's not going to happen."
Janny-:"hahaha! Okay right. Look at it this way, you have to wonder what kind of a guy he is if he's claiming that he always attracts the same type of woman? It can't be all the woman's fault? You don't need that anyways.Look at it this way, you did him a favour."
Me-:"How?"
Janny-:"Betting he has been bottling it up and needed to tell someone. If he found you comforting enough to explode on you then you triggered something in him."
I laughed for a bit on that one.
Walsh-:"There's nothing fresh there."
I was lost for a few minutes on that, as my head was spinning from the other messages.Then I realized he was talking about the wrestling website. "Yeah, I noticed. Too bad too, would like to see some pics of the Manager."
Walsh-:"So, what's up?"
Me-:"Oh my god its like telegram, telephone, telea-drag queen. And you can read about it in a few minutes."
Walsh-:"Whatever he's told you to do, do the opposite."
Me-:"Too late. Seriously, this mess is blog worthy."
Sunday, August 7, 2016
Dirty Laundry 57
I did a reading for my friend Scarlett the other day, that went shall I say, horribly wrong. According to her, it went horribly wrong. The main relationship cards came up in the reversed positions, Two of Cups, Lovers, and Four of Wands. All bottoms up. She physically cringed and sort of pulled her hands into her sleeves when she saw them. It got worse from there, as the pregnancy cards came up, Empress, Ace of Wands, and Queen of Pentacles. She looked at me with this absolute fear in her eyes. She then admitted she's been sick off and on for the last week, thinking it was stress from the original situation she was asking about.
Okay, don't shoot the messenger, I am only telling you what I see here. I happened to notice she'd taken off her engagement ring too. Hence the desire for a reading to begin with.
While we were sitting in the cafe doing the reading, this really cute guy came in. He's a regular there and I've noticed only comes in on days when Scarlett is working. I've noticed this, Pussycat has noticed this, Scarlett has not. I left a few minutes after Cute Regular got there.
Scarlett messaged me awhile after that asking "What should I do?"
Me-:"Cute Regular. Grab him like now, while you've got the chance before you move."
She must have told Pussycat what I'd said because he texted me last night.
Pussycat-:"I agree!"
Me-:"?????"
Pussycat-:"I've been telling her for two years this guy is no good for her. She needs to dump him, and I think Cute Regular is just what she needs to do. So I agree."
Everyone has been telling her if she's doubting her relationship then she already knows what she needs to do about it.
Pussycat-:"How's it going for you?"
Me-:"Fine."
Pussycat-:"Has your ex seen you?"
Me-:"No. I've managed to avoid bumping into him again."
Pussycat-:"You need to get a new mans. New mans!!! We all need new mans."
Me-:"Preach it sister."
Pussycat-:"I'm doing a spell to bring just more love into my life. Do you want me to do one for you? Not a love spell, I don't touch those, but a spell just to make you more sexy."
Me-:"Thanks. Cool."
Pussycat-:"But...if I were to word something in there what do you want in a man besides a big penis?"
I laughed on that for a few minutes. "Um...someone with the same sense of humour as me, and someone who speaks the same language as me."
Pussycat-:"Sweetie everyone pretty much speaks English now that's not a hard one to find."
Me-:"True but I was meaning someone who really gets my weirdness."
Pussycat-:"I get your weirdness!!!! We are the weridos Mr."
Me-:"You're gay, you don't count"
Pussycat-:"I love the Craft. I have the soundtrack on right now."
Me-:"But that's what I mean. I want a man who speaks vampire movie."
Okay, don't shoot the messenger, I am only telling you what I see here. I happened to notice she'd taken off her engagement ring too. Hence the desire for a reading to begin with.
While we were sitting in the cafe doing the reading, this really cute guy came in. He's a regular there and I've noticed only comes in on days when Scarlett is working. I've noticed this, Pussycat has noticed this, Scarlett has not. I left a few minutes after Cute Regular got there.
Scarlett messaged me awhile after that asking "What should I do?"
Me-:"Cute Regular. Grab him like now, while you've got the chance before you move."
She must have told Pussycat what I'd said because he texted me last night.
Pussycat-:"I agree!"
Me-:"?????"
Pussycat-:"I've been telling her for two years this guy is no good for her. She needs to dump him, and I think Cute Regular is just what she needs to do. So I agree."
Everyone has been telling her if she's doubting her relationship then she already knows what she needs to do about it.
Pussycat-:"How's it going for you?"
Me-:"Fine."
Pussycat-:"Has your ex seen you?"
Me-:"No. I've managed to avoid bumping into him again."
Pussycat-:"You need to get a new mans. New mans!!! We all need new mans."
Me-:"Preach it sister."
Pussycat-:"I'm doing a spell to bring just more love into my life. Do you want me to do one for you? Not a love spell, I don't touch those, but a spell just to make you more sexy."
Me-:"Thanks. Cool."
Pussycat-:"But...if I were to word something in there what do you want in a man besides a big penis?"
I laughed on that for a few minutes. "Um...someone with the same sense of humour as me, and someone who speaks the same language as me."
Pussycat-:"Sweetie everyone pretty much speaks English now that's not a hard one to find."
Me-:"True but I was meaning someone who really gets my weirdness."
Pussycat-:"I get your weirdness!!!! We are the weridos Mr."
Me-:"You're gay, you don't count"
Pussycat-:"I love the Craft. I have the soundtrack on right now."
Me-:"But that's what I mean. I want a man who speaks vampire movie."
Wednesday, August 3, 2016
Dirty Laundry 56
My cousin Walsh messaged me bit ago. "So, you alive?"
Me-:"Yeah?"
Walsh-:"And? What happened the other day? You bump into him again?"
Me-:"I hid like a coward never poked my face out of the apartment door. Finally had to as trash needed to go out. Wrote lots though. Like five parts to the fairytale already posted a couple."
Walsh-:"I saw the one about the guy getting raped."
Me-:"Good, bad what?" he went silent for awhile. "What did you think of that part?"
Walsh-:"It was okay better than some of the other stuff you'd written lately. I like the new characters."
Me-:"I was inspired by that new company lately."
Walsh-:"You're New Favourite, he's going to company number two eh?"
Me-:"NOOOOO!!!!" I actually think I whined. "Don't tell me stuff like that! I stopped watching company number two like two months ago. Damn it! He's the main reason I've been interested in the new company."
Walsh-:"hahaha!"
Me-:"You're lying to me aren't you?" He sent me a link to the wiki page for company number two, and sure enough my New Favourite is listed as being on their roster. Damn it! "You do these things to make me cry don't you?"
Walsh-:"Yes. This case yes. You going to be okay?"
Me-:"Yeah, just means I have to start watching the other company again is all"
Walsh-:"I meant the real thing with ----- living upstairs. You over it yet?"
Me-:"Well I wasn't thinking about it right now till you brought it up again."
Me-:"Yeah?"
Walsh-:"And? What happened the other day? You bump into him again?"
Me-:"I hid like a coward never poked my face out of the apartment door. Finally had to as trash needed to go out. Wrote lots though. Like five parts to the fairytale already posted a couple."
Walsh-:"I saw the one about the guy getting raped."
Me-:"Good, bad what?" he went silent for awhile. "What did you think of that part?"
Walsh-:"It was okay better than some of the other stuff you'd written lately. I like the new characters."
Me-:"I was inspired by that new company lately."
Walsh-:"You're New Favourite, he's going to company number two eh?"
Me-:"NOOOOO!!!!" I actually think I whined. "Don't tell me stuff like that! I stopped watching company number two like two months ago. Damn it! He's the main reason I've been interested in the new company."
Walsh-:"hahaha!"
Me-:"You're lying to me aren't you?" He sent me a link to the wiki page for company number two, and sure enough my New Favourite is listed as being on their roster. Damn it! "You do these things to make me cry don't you?"
Walsh-:"Yes. This case yes. You going to be okay?"
Me-:"Yeah, just means I have to start watching the other company again is all"
Walsh-:"I meant the real thing with ----- living upstairs. You over it yet?"
Me-:"Well I wasn't thinking about it right now till you brought it up again."
Sunday, July 31, 2016
Dirty Laundry 55
I was typing so fast my text came out like this "ohmygodheishere"
Pussycat:-"What?
Me-" He's here! Upstairs!"
Pussycat -"Who?"
Me-"My ex!"
Pussycat-"Your ex is where?"
Me-"Upstairs!"
I really didn't understand how that sentence could be misread? I then shot the same panicked message to my cousin Walsh. He didn't reply right away.
Pussycat- "What do you mean, he's upstairs?"
Me-"I mean my ex just moved in upstairs!!!!!" the phone binged while I was typing. It was Walsh.
Walsh-:"What's going on?"
Me-:"He's here. In the building. Upstairs. Saw him as I came home from groceries."
Walsh-:"Crap!"
Pussycat-:"Tell me exactly what happened."
Walsh-:"You sure he moved in and not just visiting?"
Me to Walsh-:"Yep! I was coming across the parking lot, and he was pulling out of it, looked at me, looked down as if caught doing something he shouldn't, then ripped out of the lot like the devil after him."
Walsh-:"Again, I ask, are you sure he moved in and is not just visiting?"
Me-:"Yes! He's been back and forth with stuff making noise on the stairs."
Walsh-:"It's a huge building. He might not even be on your side of it?"
Me-:"He's in the apartment right above. I've seen him go past my window twice in the last hour."
Me to Pussycat-:"My ex, the one who shattered my self esteem, just moved in to the apartment above me. I can't breathe." I sent him the same message I had just sent my cousin.
Pussycat-:"If you made him that uncomfortable it is better than you think if he turned and walked away with his tail between his legs you have a one up."
Me to Pussycat-:"I don't see it. I just see death and destruction."
Walsh-:"Go for a walk. Calm down."
Me-:"Don't want to. Just want him to leave. I was here first!!!"
Walsh-:"Yeah, that's mature."
Me-:"Mature was never in the...hold up Pussycat is phoning."
Walsh-:"You ran and told your little drag queen?"
Me-:"Someone's jealous."
Walsh-:"Whatever he tells you do the opposite!"
Pussycat:-"What?
Me-" He's here! Upstairs!"
Pussycat -"Who?"
Me-"My ex!"
Pussycat-"Your ex is where?"
Me-"Upstairs!"
I really didn't understand how that sentence could be misread? I then shot the same panicked message to my cousin Walsh. He didn't reply right away.
Pussycat- "What do you mean, he's upstairs?"
Me-"I mean my ex just moved in upstairs!!!!!" the phone binged while I was typing. It was Walsh.
Walsh-:"What's going on?"
Me-:"He's here. In the building. Upstairs. Saw him as I came home from groceries."
Walsh-:"Crap!"
Pussycat-:"Tell me exactly what happened."
Walsh-:"You sure he moved in and not just visiting?"
Me to Walsh-:"Yep! I was coming across the parking lot, and he was pulling out of it, looked at me, looked down as if caught doing something he shouldn't, then ripped out of the lot like the devil after him."
Walsh-:"Again, I ask, are you sure he moved in and is not just visiting?"
Me-:"Yes! He's been back and forth with stuff making noise on the stairs."
Walsh-:"It's a huge building. He might not even be on your side of it?"
Me-:"He's in the apartment right above. I've seen him go past my window twice in the last hour."
Me to Pussycat-:"My ex, the one who shattered my self esteem, just moved in to the apartment above me. I can't breathe." I sent him the same message I had just sent my cousin.
Pussycat-:"If you made him that uncomfortable it is better than you think if he turned and walked away with his tail between his legs you have a one up."
Me to Pussycat-:"I don't see it. I just see death and destruction."
Walsh-:"Go for a walk. Calm down."
Me-:"Don't want to. Just want him to leave. I was here first!!!"
Walsh-:"Yeah, that's mature."
Me-:"Mature was never in the...hold up Pussycat is phoning."
Walsh-:"You ran and told your little drag queen?"
Me-:"Someone's jealous."
Walsh-:"Whatever he tells you do the opposite!"
Sunday, June 5, 2016
Dirty Laundry 54
Why is it, even when we know better, we do really stupid things?
I've been home sick with a horrible head cold, sneezing, snotting, coughing, watery eyes, headache etc. So I've been kicking back and hanging out on facebook today. Chatting with a few of the new people who've come into my life in the last few months. Aka, the local witches and drag queens. All was going fine, you know covered in snot but otherwise normal, when bam! There he is. My ex. Not just any of the guys I've been dumb enough to get involved with, but THE EX. His picture keeps popping up.
You have 5 mutual friends.
5 mutual friends. Why is the universe doing that? And why oh god am I stupid enough to check out his page? That's the real question right? Can I just blame it on the snotty kleenex and cold pills? No, just checking.
So his page is half loaded when I hit the close tab button. Like a teenaged girl dialing her crush and hanging up. That's how I feel right now. Not that I think teenaged girls bother dialing the crushes and hanging up now a days. Now a days, I'm fairly sure they just stalk them on twitter or instawhateverishotnow. Sending them naked photos of themselves. It takes guts to be a teenaged girl in today's instant digital world. Dude, I had it so easy back in the stone ages. You could only be rejected one of two ways, by phone or in person. And your friends only found out about it if they were there when it happened or you cried to them afterwards. Now, everybody knows instantly. And if they check their instawhateverishotnow before you, there's a high chance they know even before you do.
I've been home sick with a horrible head cold, sneezing, snotting, coughing, watery eyes, headache etc. So I've been kicking back and hanging out on facebook today. Chatting with a few of the new people who've come into my life in the last few months. Aka, the local witches and drag queens. All was going fine, you know covered in snot but otherwise normal, when bam! There he is. My ex. Not just any of the guys I've been dumb enough to get involved with, but THE EX. His picture keeps popping up.
You have 5 mutual friends.
5 mutual friends. Why is the universe doing that? And why oh god am I stupid enough to check out his page? That's the real question right? Can I just blame it on the snotty kleenex and cold pills? No, just checking.
So his page is half loaded when I hit the close tab button. Like a teenaged girl dialing her crush and hanging up. That's how I feel right now. Not that I think teenaged girls bother dialing the crushes and hanging up now a days. Now a days, I'm fairly sure they just stalk them on twitter or instawhateverishotnow. Sending them naked photos of themselves. It takes guts to be a teenaged girl in today's instant digital world. Dude, I had it so easy back in the stone ages. You could only be rejected one of two ways, by phone or in person. And your friends only found out about it if they were there when it happened or you cried to them afterwards. Now, everybody knows instantly. And if they check their instawhateverishotnow before you, there's a high chance they know even before you do.
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