Friday, November 30, 2012

Recap of random SATC episode

Season 1 Episode 1 Sex and the City

The first episode has a few things different from what would become the tradition of the show, for starters, it's one of the few times we see Carrie as a brunette. It also has multiple characters talking  as if the 4th wall wasn't there. It also has Carrie's apartment over a coffee shop.

We open with Carrie talking about another writer she knows who falls for a banker.  Much like Carrie and Mr. Big.

One of the first scenes of Carrie Bradshaw is through her window working on her laptop, and we get the question of the week, though it's actually a statement this time around  Cupid has flown the co-op then Carrie asks "how the hell did we get into this mess?"

We then see one of Carrie's articles "Unmarried Women, Toxic Bachelors" (which is direct from the book and I'm guessing from the original column)
Then the rest of the women are introduced, and their core characters are established. This is where  the idea of romance vs just sex, gets thrown onto the table. Which would become the biggest theme throughout the series.

An ex boyfriend of Carrie's shows up and Carrie makes a comment about having gotten into a dating pattern with him, 3 previous times, and then having a one night stand with him thinking she can handle the idea of just sex, but realizes that she needs to be in a relationship to feel comfortable with herself.
This would ironically mirror her relationship with Mr. Big throughout the series.

As she leaves his apartment, she bumps into Mr. Big, literally. Spilling her purse on the street. 
Later, we see Mr. Big turn down Samantha, and Miranda choose the nice guy. While Charlotte is the one being turned down when her date makes a statement about having to have sex that night. He is then seen with Samantha.
The final scene is Carrie and Big in his car after he spots her walking home and offers her a ride. She turns to him and asks if he's ever been in love and he smiles giving what would become his  classic line "absof***inglutely"

And the fact that we see Carrie asking questions to Mr. Big would also foreshadow how she deals with the relationship throughout the series. Never quite sure of herself when it comes to him. And Big always seeming to have the upper hand simply because he's more confident and secure with himself.

This episode is sort of the idea of nice vs jerks.  The idea of opposites is shown in this first episode, half the male characters are wanting no strings and total control, half are not, same goes with the female characters, half of them don't want to compromise, and half of them are leaving everything up to the men. 
Is the message here that deep down everyone is wanting the same thing, or that not enough communication is happening, and everyone is assuming stuff about the people around them?

Thursday, November 29, 2012

Post it Nov 29th evening

Dear Herman:

I'm sitting here listening to a cd, and there was a line in one of the songs that goes "you can freak if you want to freak"  which, is how I've been feeling the past while.
Freaked out. 

I don't even know if you're still reading me or not, after my  post the other day, I can't blame you if you aren't.  But if you still are...

I think I figured out why you haven't bothered to come out of the shadows yet.  I'm a bitch.  And let's be honest, I'm not in a great a place right now for anyone.  Even if you did end up being/are The Celebrity. 
I had a series of total craziness and bad vibes today that all centered around blogs and emails. And now, I'm sitting here having to admit that way too much of my life in the last few years has centered around that.  Around the internet. 
To quote from Interview with a Vampire "life has no meaning anymore"

Don't worry, I'm not suicidal. Immature but that's about it.  Okay a hothead and a total dreamer.
But, whether you're pissed at me or if something else is going on, I have no idea.  
And I'm flying blind here, on faith.  Faith that all my readers are still around somewhere. All seven of you.

But, this just proves a few things.  One of which its really really time to reinvent myself. I've been saying that for about six months now, and today just put the stamp on the envelope.

I'm sitting here now, and no matter how much I crank the music, all I can hear is PartyGirl downstairs with her friends.

The other thing it proves is that I'm just not ready to give up on my dreams.  I did a tarot reading last night, and the Knight of Cups came up. The particular deck has it listed as a Romeo in a Lizard suit
So Mr. Scratchy, is that you?  Has my imagination the last year or so of what you are like, been even sort of right or are you someone I never thought of?

I still think you're a wrestler.  And I still think you wear glasses, are a nerdy type artist and have a dog.  I still think you wear those pajama bottoms, that you still drink tea, and that you are either in university or even a professor.

I await the real you... when the time is right.

Until then... maybe you can just let me know if you know how The Other Guy's surgeries went after the year he had?

Did SATC teach us wrong?

If you watched the show Sex and the City like millions over the years, or been following some of the posts on here where I've talked about episodes, you know that the characters ranged from subtle to over the top in their ways of dealing with love. romance and sex.

Whether taking the advice humourously or seriously, (and you know I sometimes did both) I can't help but wonder;  was the advice women decoded from it bad for us?

If you've watched even one episode, then you know that the characters were an over exaggeration - most of the time- of how people react to things. We all go through these times of panic and fear that things aren't working out right.
Hell, I made a name for myself doing it.  But the show did it with such a degree of satire that on the surface it looked normal.  And to some maybe it is?

With the new show Carrie Diaries about a month away, I thought I would start to give some attention to the original show (may add the books and movies, may not haven't decided yet)

So over the course of the next while (basically between now and the debut of Carrie Diaries) I thought I would talk about some of the episodes.  Consider it a movie review of the episodes (yeah that really made more sense in my brain but I can't word it any better right now)

So to kick it all off, in true Carrie Bradshaw style... I couldn't help but wonder, in a world that is all about self gratification instantly, is there room for improvement and are we willing to wait for it?

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

I look that bad?

I was out at the grocery about an hour ago, and my Uncle was with me. He was carrying the basket.
Standing in line, and one of the guys who stocks the shelves came over to see if I needed any help, and Uncle answered before I could.

"No, he's got me... I mean she's got me.. SHE's got me. I'm her Uncle, carrying stuff."

Me-: "Do I look that bad?"

He just sniffed giggled and popped his gum. I caught a glimpse of myself then in one of the doors of the frozen food and felt hideous.  Yeah, I'm looking like Jabba the Hut with glasses.
But I have to wonder what or who made Uncle so nervous? 

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Wash your feet

Mom was on the phone with my sister about a half hour ago asking how everything was going with my brother-in-law since the situation few weeks ago with the fire.
He's healing, but still in a lot of pain and starting to become a pain in the arse because he still can't go back to work.
Middle of the conversation, mom pulled the phone away from her ear and I could hear someone screaming in the background.  After a few minutes, mom was laughing, and I could hear my sister laughing on the other end of the phone. 
Sister is step mom to four kids, three boys and one girl.  The girl is under 12 years old (seriously I haven't paid attention to the ages) and she was screaming because when she went into the oldest boy's room looking for cash (yeah she's got a stealing issue) and found his playboys.
Sister said the kid came running out of the room with it holding it by the corner, jumping from one foot to the other like it was a dead animal. 
When sister asked why she was dancing around like that, the kid said she stepped on it. 
Hence the laughter from my sister.  

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Dirty Laundry 21

"Ever thought that Mr. Scratchy hasn't come forward because he knows when he does, he'll end up all over the blog?" my aunt said this afternoon as she sat having a cup of tea

 Me-:"Then that would make him a coward and he's holding up the ending."

 Aunt-:"the ending?"

 Me-:"The ending of this chapter in our lives and the ending of the blog. When there is a happy ending, there will be no need for the one blog anymore. Well, take it into a different direction anyways. I'm finding it hard to believe in a happy ending now anyways. This has just dragged on for so long. I just want to know so I can move on with my life."

Aunt-:"Then what will you do? And what if he's not who you think he is?"

Me-:"Things are starting to lean towards it being someone other then the popular thought. I really believed he was The Celebrity, you know."

Aunt-:"And now you really believe it's not? Really?"

Me-:"This has been going on for the last few years. But yeah, I really believed it was up till yesterday. And I checked the usual physical stuff in the beginning, you know. Changed soaps, changed laundry cleaner, didn't have any dry skin still don't. It wasn't a physical reason; the scratching. Then when it started happening at certain times of day on a schedule...anyways, I thought I figured it out back when I started to see evidence of the wrestlers reading my blog back few years ago. So who the hell is it?"

My aunt shrugged just saying what she always says "It's just not time yet. You'll know when you're suppose to know."  
She's a life coach, that's pretty much her mantra. 

I thought about that for a few minutes.  You know, I'm really upset over a bunch of issues right now, and this is just weighting me down. 
A buddy of my cousin's sent him a link to an article, which in turn he told me about.  
Which really narrows down who Mr. Scratchy is.  Or I should say eliminates who he's not.

I've been for the last few years, going on two things; the omens (right side of body itching means soulmate is thinking of you,  if your nose is itchy it means you have a secret admirer, my nose was only itchy for the first few days till I saw The Celebrity write something that was obviously connected to my writing; so that means I know who my admirer is or at lest know of them.) and my stats on all my blogs reading the hits corresponding to  Mr. Scratchy being in the U.S.

My cousin's buddy was talking about The Celebrity being in Japan for the last few months. Which means, he's not Mr. Scratchy. At lest, not currently.
So therefore, Mr. Scratchy you really have no reason for not having stepped out of the shadows. And you've played me, my readers and everyone else who's been part of the conversations.You've let everyone think you were someone you're not. You let me believe you were The Celebrity. 

Aunt-:"So what do you know for sure? And think about that before you answer. There's the logical truth and then there is the spiritual truth."

Me-:"I know nothing for sure. Someone in the wrestling industry who lives in the States. That's it. Someone who wanted me to believe they were The Celebrity. Which seems like a shitty thing to do."

Aunt-:"Well, like I said, when you're suppose to know, the universe will let you. Mr.Scratchy will appear like magick."

Friday, November 23, 2012

Dirty Laundry 20

"Wow no one has anything nice to say about him"  Walsh said leaning over my shoulder  as he told me about a thing he'd seen online about The Celebrity.

 Me-:"Why do you show me these things? Besides, that was a few years ago look at the date on it."

Walsh-:"I still don't know why you like this guy?"

Me-:"Vampire with a soul?"

Walsh-:"Do I think he's a vampire, yes but do I think he has a soul, doubtful."

Me-:"Gushing over the wrestler more so then the man, I don't know a damned thing about the real guy only what I've seen on tv and the year he worked on the company blog. Why the hell did you feel the need to show me this? Trying to ruin the image I have of him."

He was dropping off his sister for mom to babysit. I was wondering if he was looking after his sister to begin with why he didn't just let her stay with them for the night?  Which I stupidly asked and the kid who's 6 years old, (you know the one from my uncle's second marriage) answered me saying that her other sister was scary now.

Ah, so their sister was  back from rehab and she was staying with Walsh and his wife and kids for a few weeks to make sure she didn't relapse.   Understood.

Then the kid turned around and asked me why I was back at my mom's.  That kid is too smart for her own good.

Me-:"I don't want to be alone right now."

Walsh pointed at the computer and laughed. "Ever think that maybe there is no difference?  That the character he plays on wrestling is what the man is like in real life?" he dropped his voice so that the kid didn't hear him. "Maybe he's just a douchbag? "

Me-:"Don't ruin him for me. The less I know about the real man he is when the cameras stop rolling, the better I can like the wrestler and the better I can keep him in my writing."

Mom was half listening to all this while getting supper for the kid. "Huh?"

Me-:"when I write. I can't get into a character when I write, specially the hero in my novels if I can't have the room for dreaming about them. If I know too much it ruins it for me and I can't picture the guys the way I need to, to build a world around them."

Mom-: "Why don't you just create from scratch?"

Me-:"Most of it is. Just always works better if you have the beginnings. Like the way the character looks."

Mom-:"I still don't get it."

Walsh-:"I do, I think. Anyways, I have to go. Dad will be by tomorrow to pick you up."

My cousin left, and I would be lying if I said he hadn't pissed me off just a little.  It just seems to me that over the last 7 years, everyone I talk to has something to say about The Celebrity and the fact I still like him.

Can I have one of those

I'm stuck on a character in my latest story.   The best friend, a supporting role so to speak.
He's like the warm cup of tea on the cold afternoon instead of the shot of bourbon, the sweet scent of apples and cinnamon instead of the sharp tack of mint and lemon.
He's there, just to the left of my mind, waiting, wanting my attention.

Now, if I could just figure him out in the plot of the story as well as I just wrote that paragraph I'd be golden.
And I've tried writing the piece without him, but it doesn't feel right.  I know what he looks like, I know what he sounds like when I close my eyes, can imagine him down to the length of his sideburns. But I can't seem to settle on what to have him do in the story.

Why is he there?  Other then to be the balance to the lead character?  Sometimes it's the supporting characters that are hardest to write. The ones that need the most attention.
The backbone of the story.

post it Morning Nov 23rd

Is it too much to hope that readers come to my blog because of me, and not because of a screen shot I did of a wrestler?
As hot as The Other Guy is,  and we all agree that boy is hotter then hell in a bathtub; I'm tired of looking at my stats on my other works to find that I have two hundred and fifty hits to old old old posts because people were searching for photos of him.
Yeah, I know, I did it to myself by spending the majority of the last 7 years blogging and writing about wrestlers, but doesn't change the fact it would be nice to know someone likes my blog cause of me.

Well, Mr. Scratchy, how's your Friday starting?
As you can tell, mine is not off to the best form at all. Feeling like it's just really time to reinvent myself.  I mean, why not, wrestlers do it all the time. Move from one company to another changing their stage name. Creating a new gimmick for themselves.  Why am I stuck?  Or at lest I feel like I'm stuck.

I assume Herman, that you live in the same timezone as I do, but for all I know, it's not Friday yet where you are, or maybe it's already Saturday? 
Either way, I hope when you read this, your day is better then mine.

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Friends or lovers?

I just finished watching a movie about a couple who start off as slightly disinterested pawns who end up realizing that they are perfect for each other.
Which, seems to be the main recipe needed for any decent romantic comedy.

I went from watching that, to reading an article on an online magazine about men and their secret love for plus size girls.

I've been on both ends of the extreme with my size -more then once, and have to say that what seemed to be true for the author of the article, isn't always true for the rest of us. 
The author commented on the fact that she's always the best friend, but she's also the one who the guys are hitting on constantly.

Must be nice.

This whole thing has got me thinking.  During the years I've been at or over the 200 pound mark, I've been the girl all my male friends spend their late night chat time with, the one they spend Sunday afternoons with watching wrestling, been the one they ask to help pick out stuff for their mom's for xmas. To the point many times their parents, my mom, and our mutual social group would ask if we were dating.

During my under 180 pound mark times, I've been the one calling my male friends asking what should I wear for the drinks with whomever I was having my heartbroken by at the time. And less often to be spending Sundays hanging out watching the martial arts movie fests. In fact, in my thinner times, my male friends seem to have no interest at all in hanging around.

So I'm confused.

I'm only useful if I'm over a size 18?  Yet at the same time, I'm viewed as less desirable because I'm not thin, therefore ugly.

Still confused.

It's like that episode of Sex and the City in the first season when Carrie and Mr. Big go to dinner in this shady place and bump into a male friend of Carrie's who's dating the fat girl that he is ashamed of, who ends up dumping him for his commitment issues. (season 1 episode 6 Secret Sex)

Life really does not get easier as you get older. Just more mind fields to discover.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

post-it Nov 20th 2012

I haven't written a post it note in a while Mr. Scratchy.  But I'm still here. Are you?

I have been writing the last while.  Another new story, about this guy and his jealousy issues.  Are you a jealous man Mr. Scratchy?
I think everyone gets jealous to some degree at times in their lives. It's a human emotion and it's a case of who can handle it better then others.

I'm looking forward to the new show Carrie Diaries,  which I talked about in my last post. Hoping it will start a small spark for me the way the original show SATC did.

Am I allowed to say that the dude in Company #1's new branch who also has two toned hair, is hot... too late I said it.

Okay Herman, I imagine you to be checking into this tonight, after work. I actually think you're in a hotel having been at work for wrestling. I know, I have been avoiding talking too much about that haven't I?   Anyways, I think you just got in and are tired, sore, and looking for something to help you sleep.
So of course you would think of me and my blog.    Well, Mr. Scratchy; hope all is well on your end.

Monday, November 19, 2012

What would Carrie do?

The start date for the prequel to Sex and the City,  the Carrie Diaries has been announced. 
January 14th at 8pm.  A Monday night. Also a prime slot for a show about teen turned fashion queen. It will be taking over the spot currently being warmed by one of CW's long running shows.

I loved the books that this show is based on, the original tv show and it's original book is still one of my all time favourites.  But, I'm not sure how well this offering is going to fair.

The two books - Carrie Diaries and Summer in the City,  happen during the early to mid-1980's. And unless this show decides to follow Carrie through the 80's into well 1998 when SATC starts, I don't see how good it will be.  I don't think too many fans will be able to stick with it if it stays within a short time frame.

With all that said, I also know as each season progresses, so will the decade. 

I guess, after the last few decade specific shows like Pan-Am, that failed; I'm worried Carrie Diaries won't be given the chance to become what SATC fans have grown to love.

I'm greatly looking forward to seeing how Carrie Diaries will handle itself, and hope it survives to at lest a third season.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

Oh my...

Back and mom's and we got a phone call from my sister. They were at the hospital.  My brother in law got burned.  Half his face and his hands.
He was working out in the backyard and poof.  Something exploded and his sweater caught on fire. He managed to get it off, but not before his face from his nose to jaw was burned, eyebrows gone, and both hands to the wrists.  2nd degree burns.

This family is cursed.

Locked out

Banging on the windows of the building about twenty minutes ago.
Then shouting.

the Party Girl downstairs in the apartment below me, had locked someone out.  Sounded like a female voice screaming, don't know if it's her sister or roommate or girlfriend or what, but from the screaming they were doing in the doorway of the building, it had to do with the locked out one having stayed at a party until dawn.

Ah, to be young and stupid.  Don't miss that kind of stuff at all.

Well, there was nothing for me to do but to put on a cd to drown out the noise.   This building is terrible for fights.   Heavy goth music with my coffee, what a way to start a Saturday.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Hopefully you'll get what you wanted

I went to the mall today with mom. Just before leaving the building, we bumped into Sophia's mom and her boyfriend.
I may add that she's dating a man younger then I am.  Yes folks, she's nearly 35 years older then he is.

Sophia's mom spotted us and came over with this grin on her face.  Which is about all that is left of her.  She had her stomach stapled few years ago and is a walking skeleton now.  Said she's down to about 95 pounds. Which for a woman who is nearly 6 feet tall, not the best thing.
The first thing out of her mouth was that Gilly (Sophia has two younger sisters) was finishing off her degree for medical lab work.  The next thing out of her mouth was that everyone else in the family were about to push off to Toronto.  The she tugged on her pants showing the belt she has to use, and talked about how she's still loosing weight from her surgery and that she was wearing a clothes from the junior miss sizes. Then informed us that her youngest daughter who's not even 19 yet has a second child who is a year old.

Not once did she ask how mom or me were doing.  It wasn't until she mentioned that they were currently living with the youngest daughter, that mom made a comment about me having been back and forth the last 8 months at her place, cause of my surgery.
Sophia's mom never even asked what my surgery was for.  Her boyfriend just stood there giggling rocking from side to side on his feet, his hands deep in the pockets of his sweatpants.

When I look at the two of them, I keep thinking of the old nursery rhyme about Jack Sprat... jack sprat could eat no fat his wife could eat no lean so between them both they licked the platter clean.... only he's the 300 pounder and she's a stick figure.

While all this was going on, the guy who runs the health food supplement store was pacing back and forth listening to us.  He was cute.  Had I been alone, I would have gone over there and tried talking to him.
I'm sure he was calculating how much product he could push on one of us given that mom, myself and Sophia's mom's boyfriend are all small hippos. 

I don't know what annoyed me more, the fact they never asked us about how we are given we haven't seen them in over a year, or the fact she was going on and on about the weight loss and making comments about her boyfriend's weight?
Cause I'll tell you, he sure didn't look like he was having the best self esteem moment.


Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Cup of tea

I wish I knew what you wanted me to say?

I was pestered by some random emails to join some new blogging thing.  I put them off for days, and today decided to check them out. 
So far, I'm not happy with them.

I think I pissed someone off on a fan page thingie too.  The person was asking a wrestling question and I gave an honest gut reaction.  They never replied back.  So who knows.

Have I mentioned that the last few years I have found it almost impossible to make friends? 

I'm starting to feel like the character on The Big Bang Theory, the Amy character. 

I know, this would be an excellent chance to do one of my posts where I compare the show to my current life and give a life lesson, only I just don't want to.
That's bad isn't it?

I just want to sit here, drink my earl grey tea and talk to someone.  Someone who does not live in my mother's building.

The drama has ended.  With the blockbuster no longer here, and the coffee shop gone there are no hang outs left in the neighbourhood.   And as far as the grocery store goes... what's the point?  
Drama Queen has moved out of the neighbourhood...thank god, and even Sophia and JTGG have both moved to Toronto.

Wow.  Everyone who had been a part of my life up till last January is gone.  Most of them moved, a few just...whatever. They poofed off into the darkness or something.
This has been the hardest year of my life. The emptiest, loneliest.

My aunt who is a life coach, told me to sit down and write the life I want.  It stumped me. It really did.  I have no idea how to write a new chapter as she put it.  No idea what it is I really want my life to look like.
I just know I want to share it. 

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Random Sunday afternoon Nov 4

Munsters Go Home!   is on tv.  Not the best of the Munster's movies, but cute none the less.

There is something about my family, and the people around us (ie sister's friends, people we grew up with etc) that just naturally expects every woman to date/marry a man older.  Why is that?

One of my uncles was going on about it earlier and when I asked why he thought that dating a younger man was a bad thing, he said it had to do with evolution.

That's bullshit. 

I know back in the day of Jane Austen, men did not even consider getting married till they were at lest 30 years old, unless they had money.  Even then, they were encouraged to marry very young girls.  They were expected to have made their wealth before they could marry.

But now?  Now, it is encouraged in the last five or so years for a woman to be the one with all the wealth. 
But that's not what my topic today is.  Today my topic is that my family believes you are lowering yourself if you are a woman who marries or gets involved with a younger man.  Money or not.

No one has a real answer for me either.  I just get told "it's just the way it's done"  and "it's just the evolution of it"  and "it means he's smart."   really? you're giving me that as an answer?

All I know is that my whole life I've liked younger men.  I've dated guys who were only a year younger, and guys who are up to nine years younger.  

Okay, back to my Munsters movie

Thursday, November 1, 2012

post-it Nov 1st 2012

Hallowe'en night, and everyone is out but me.  I'm at home watching the Rocky Horror Picture Show, in true geekiness like I do every year.
My dorkdom knows no ends.  Coffee, pumpkin pie and a crazy movie.

But that's fitting to talk about on here.  The loss of innocence and the seduction of flesh. In every sense of the word.
The sexuality of it is there, you can't run away from it any faster then you would a hungry werewolf. But it's also about control, manipulation, fear, and body parts.
It's Hallowe'en, I had to get a jab in there didn't I?

Have we as a society actually moved into a state where we can truly handle the ideas in this movie?  The idea of tolerance to the ultimate degree? 
I'm not just talking about the sex and drugs that are there but the rebellion of ego?  When Brad and Janet first come to the house, they are following traditional puritan values, but Columbia was a  complete devotee. Having let go of her own ego and blindly agreed to live in the shadow of Frank'n'Furter.

Rocky Horror Picture Show opens up so many different points of conversation. Just it's tagline for the dance number, "don't dream it be it"  seems to be a reinforced creed, of  permission of trusting that everything is better if you just let go.

As I sit here thinking about this film tonight Mr. Scratchy, I have to wonder if you're not watching it as well on your end of things?  Maybe you're coming home from a midnight showing of it, and reading this before heading to bed?