Tuesday, December 31, 2013

New Year's Eve Day

I woke up to a message from my cousin Walsh, asking what my plans were for tonight?  Messaged back saying if I didn't end up babysitting, same old same old; a few movies and a pizza. What can I say, I have less and less of a life.  Which is why I haven't been in on this blog in weeks.  Nothing is going on. There has been no one to talk to.
Well, nothing new anyways.  Storm is back in town, bumped into him at the grocery last week. He hasn't changed at all.  Had a strange conversation with Tarot Lady earlier in the week about fairies. Yes, the kind with wings. I've said more then a few times, that I believe in a lot of things, but dude, there is just so many times you can hear the sentence "Tinkerbell isn't just a name of a cartoon, but the actual category of angels."  I ended up walking around for the rest of that day singing the line "Fairies wear boots and you've got to believe me."  from that old Black Sabbath song.

On to semi-reasonable things.  Caught last night's wrestling. And I have to say, Dimmer still needs a haircut. 

But, beyond that, I don't know who's a better actor, Mad Hatter, or Werewolf King?  Mad Hatter was his totally brilliant self on the show last night. Picking his teeth, scratching his fleas- which I noticed was indeed the right side of his body, he needs to be careful on that, remember not to scratch the right side on camera otherwise, you know people like my cousin Walsh will point it out to me and laugh like a lunatic for the next month- shaking like a kid who lost his ritalin... then you had Werewolf King, who went back and forth between laughing at Mad Hatter to this look of totally disapproving fed up babysitter. There were actual moments when I had to wonder if Werewolf King was actually feeling like a fed up babysitter at Mad Hatter's behaviour?  I thought Mad Hatter was going to start sucking his thumb at one point he was biting his nails so much.

I'm waiting for the day he comes to ringside with a dream catcher clipped to his hair... long story.



Saturday, December 14, 2013

After Friday 13th

Sister was in a crap mood earlier. My brother in law is sick and acting like the world is coming to an end. We were at mom's for a very rare night where we had dinner together. That happens maybe once every four years.
My cousin Walsh dropped Mavis off for babysitting.  She saw me hunched over a notepad writing.  "What you writing?"

Me-:"Fairy Tale."

Mavis-:"What's it about? Can I read it?"

Me-:"These are just notes for the real story which I've been writing on the blog."

Mavis-:"Can I read the story on the blog?"

Me-:"It's not for kids."

Mavis-:"But you just said it's a fairy tale. How can it not be for kids if it's a fairy tale?"

Me-:"It's a fairy tale for grown ups."

Mavis-:"What's it about?"

Me-:"Alice in Wonderland meets the Big Bad Wolf."

Mavis-:"Oh. I want that." she was pointing to a commercial on tv. "What do you want for christmas?"

Me-:"For the readers of my fairy tale to comment on my blog and to be married happily ever after for real."

Mavis started laughing like it was the funniest thing on the planet, then flopped back on the sofa as if she'd worked pulling a mountain, her hand over her forehead dramatically.

Walsh-:"Yeah, I don't understand why no one's commented on that yet? I mean, they are reading it right?" he was still fighting his winter boots the one shoelace having a knot in it.

Me-:"Yeah, if you mean the wrestlers. Pretty sure of it. Steady hits on the fairy tale same amount every time I post, so guess so."

Mavis-:"Why aren't you married? And why don't you have kids? Someone I could play with."

Me-:"I ask myself that every day."

Mavis-:"You ask yourself what every day? Why I don't have anyone to play with when I'm here?" she was standing up at that point her hands on head, starting to jump up and down."

Me-:"If that's what you want to hear sure."

Walsh-:"Don't get her started."

Me-:"I'm not doing anything."

Walsh-:"I was talking to Mavis. I really don't feel like seeing you cry right now."



Monday, December 9, 2013

Wow!

Got a message from my cousin Walsh few minutes ago.  "You watching wrestling tonight?"

Me-:"Yeah. Think my eyes fell out and rolled onto the floor."

Walsh-:"Hahahaha! Thought you might be drooling."  referring to the Pack having come out in suits.

Me-:"Wow. I want one of those."

Walsh-:"One what?"

Me-:"A guy that hot. Get me one for xmas."

Walsh-:"Hahahaha! They have Mad Hatter action figures at the store."

Me-:"voodoo dolls!"

I was in the middle of typing this when he messaged me again.  "Suits. You know what that means for your boys right?"

Me-:"No, what?"

Walsh-:"Crappy storylines that you're going to hate."

I didn't answer him back on that one cause he's right. I hate when he's right.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Dec 3rd 2013

Caught up with last night's wrestling, there Mr. Scratchy, Herman.  It was decent enough.   Liked the promo the Pack had, I miss seeing those. Shame they stopped posting them on the website...but anyways...

Dimmer needs a haircut. There I said it.  Rebel without a Cause needs to chop down that beard too, he's the only Pack member that is starting to look...like well something out of the fairy tale I'm writing.

My cousin Walsh dropped in for a few minutes earlier, dropped off a dvd he'd borrowed while back. Asked me if I had seen the turkey skits. No idea what he was talking about at first, then he pulled up the website and showed me.

Walsh-:"It's under the Pack heading when you search for them on the site. No idea why?"

We watched the first segment, and I pointed at the computer with my coffee cup, luckily it was nearly empty this time.

Me-:"Most likely because that's Mad Hatter." 

Walsh-:"What? In the turkey suit?"

Me-:"Who knows? The voice box thingie. That's Mad Hatter."

He looked at me like I had just told him he'd be turning into a tree at midnight. "And what makes you think that?"

Me-:"Listen to it."  I made him rewind and listen again, then told him to go to the promo from last March and to listen to it. "Tell me you didn't catch that?"

Walsh-:"The voice could be anyone, what makes you so sure...okay yeah maybe."

Me-:"That promo from March, it's the promo that got me hooked on Mad Hatter. The one that inspired me to write the novel and the fairy tale, and the whole reason I started to crush on him. I think I've watched it like ten times now."

Walsh-:"Now you've just taken all the cool out of it for me. Now every time I see the Mad Hatter, he'll be some goof."

Me-:"Join the club. If you hadn't of shown me that old youtube of his from his indie days, I'd never have seen him in that light either. So blame yourself there bud."


Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Ugh!

I hate this time of year. Honestly, if I could just jump from about November 12th to March 1st every year, I'd be happy.

I was out at the mall with mom this morning, and the santa land was up. Kids everywhere, with sticky hands and screaming and fed up parents.  And the worst part, creepy little elves. Cause, they were grown men in elf suites and beards that looked just nasty. One smelled of too much body spray when you walked past him.

This is the worst time of year to be single.

Monday, November 18, 2013

Monday Nov 18th 2013

Sort of a post-it note.

Mr. Scratchy, Herman, how has things been?
I really hope that the Rebel without a Cause and Werewolf King get their titles back soon. Shame seeing them shiny-less.
My deadline to finish the fairy tale is coming close. Need to get it done before the end of the year. A lot to cover in it still.

Was waiting for a bus at the store today, and this really stoned guy; I'd say in his 60's, started hitting on this old lady, also in her 60's. Scared the crap out of her, and she came over to where I was standing, and literally pulled me in front of her.  Like I'm anything to protect anyone. Scare them maybe but protect?  He kept trying to get her to have a drink with him, didn't give up till the bus got there.

This city gets crazier and crazier all the time.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

His butt's not real

Yesterday, was at mom's catching up with the wrestling from Monday night. Dimmer was on. I was sitting there, cup of coffee in hand and I hear  "His clothes are too tight. How does he breathe? You never see him sitting down cause I don't think he can in those pants."

Me-:"Part of his character. His gimmick. Plus, he's got a really great butt."

Mom-:"That's not real."   I nearly choked on my coffee when she said that. "That's cause his pants are too tight."

Me-:"Few times he's been on tv in wrestling shorts, his butt looks like that."

Mom-: "Or it's one of those spandex things he's wearing under them to hold it up like what women wear to suck in their gut, or implants."

Me-:"Implants?" I was laughing at that.

Mom-:"Yeah, that's it. Like what women get done in their boobs. Men get boob implants now too, half those actors don't look that good. Implants." she was nodding and shaking a pen at me. "That butt is just not real. Dimmer must have had work done."

Me-:"He's beautiful, who cares."

She continued to stare at the tv for a few more minutes while he was standing there for his segment.  "He's okay. Better looking than that Orton."

I agree with her on that.

Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Big screen

Walsh came by mom's with Mavis. Mom is babysitting her tonight yet again.

Mavis-:"You here again?"

Me-:"Internet is out at my place."

Walsh-:"Half the city's internet is out." he laughed then as he was handing my cousin her overnight bag. "Speaking of, how's the fairy tale?"

Me-:"Possibly ruined. Thanks for asking."

Mavis was climbing on him trying to hang off his neck. "Why do you say that?"

Me-:"I'm thinking I'm stuck. I wrote a few things in the story and now I'm not sure how to tie them together. So stuckage."

Walsh-:"Everything else okay? Haven't seen much on the thing." he said gesturing towards the computer, Mavis sliding down him nearly falling on her butt.

Me-:"I haven't been okay in years. Yourself?"

He just nodded, all his attention taken by his sister still trying to climb on him like monkey bars. "Dad said to give her a bath.". Mom asked him about his other sister. "She's back in the hospital. I see your boys have been on a loosing streak lately."

Me-:" Way to change the topic. Not for long, I'm sure."  Walsh said goodnight to Mavis, and then just stood there waiting for a few minutes looking lost.  "Walsh, are you needing a smoke break or something?"

Walsh-:"Yes please."   We went outside so that he could have his cigarette.  "Tell me something happy."

Me-:"Mom finally got a new computer. That's happy. There's a new delivery guy who looks to be around 30ish. That's in the happy category. Otherwise, I've got nothing."

Walsh-:"Then tell me about whatever. Anything."

Me-:"Once upon a time, in a dark and lonely place, there was a beautiful queen who was in love with the idea of being in love. Only, all the white knights were gay or married and the beautiful queen was just simply alone and out of luck. But one day, a wise old witch came through the village and offered to give the beautiful queen a special magic scroll tucked into an arrow owned by cupid, and the special magic scroll tucked into an arrow owned by cupid was destined to find the beautiful queen's true love. All she had to do was shoot it during a full moon and it would find the beautiful queen's true love. And so she did as she was instructed and shot the special magic scroll tucked into an arrow owned by cupid into the sky under the full moon and waited. Before long, a handsome young knight introduced himself to the beautiful queen, having been hit by the arrow and read the scroll. He handed it to her, told her his name, and they lived happily ever after but only for three nights a month under the full moon."

Walsh was laughing his ass off at me, three shades of red, his eyes watering which ended up sticking to his face cause it was freezing out.  "and let me guess, his name was Johnathan?"

Me-:"Don't be silly. It was MoonDoggy.  MoonDoggy Spottles the fifth, the grey knight. And he was a grey knight not a white knight because he'd passed his second level exams in the grande knighthood."  Walsh was nearly peeing himself he was laughing so hard.  "You said tell you anything."


Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Post it note Nov 5th 2013

 Mr. Scratchy, Herman.  How has it been going? Lovely to hear.
Halloween sucked.
It used to be a time when I got together with the people I cared about, we would spend the night in costume, rent bad horror movies, stuff ourselves with candy, then have a midnight Rocky Horror Picture Show party, and extremely late dinner.
But that was before everyone grew up, got married on me and had kids of their own.  No point in doing that sort of stuff alone. Lest not for me.

Nothing new really to chat about. Unless you count the new delivery guy. Todd...or Tad or something that began with a T. 

How often do we loose love?  I was watching online the show Witches of East End,  and one of the main themes is that all the characters are basically immortal.  The show so far has been about finding that unexpected love and loosing it constantly.  Makes you wonder how often people really fall into that?
How often, do the relationships we enter into, or the people we end up involved with, really are what the general society considers love? 
Yeah, I know I'm having one of those mornings.

The connections we make in our romantic lives. How often are they love?  When does a crush turn to the real heavy duty thing? 

Well Herman, as I ponder this morning on why my Mr. Right hasn't magically appeared in my life, or what your real connection is with me, I think I'll drag my butt over to mother's and catch up with last night's wrestling.

Stay frosty. And smile damn it!



Thursday, October 31, 2013

Halloween afternoon

Was at mom's for a bit today, there's a shocker for ya. And my uncle brought Mavis over for a few minutes after school to show my mom her costume.  She was wearing this really expensive purple plush witch's outfit, green face paint and long fingernails.

Mavis-:"I'm a witch for tonight!"  she spun around showing my mom trying to cackle then put the hat on my mom's head as she jumped and spun some more. "A real witch! Like Connie and her friend, yeah they are real witches, not like the kind you see in the movies, well, my costume is like the one from that movie we watched last week with the girl and the dog and the trolls."   she meant munchkins. "But I'm a real witch! Like Connie." she took the hat back from my mom as she continued to spin around the kitchen. "See my socks even have spiders on them, they're orange on top see auntie see."  she stuck her foot in my mom's face, then mine while my uncle just laughed.

Mom-:"There is no such thing as real witches." she glared at me.

Mavis-:"Yes there is! Connie and her friend are real witches, and you need to cover your ears cause I forgot I'm not suppose to talk about it in front of you." she ran over to me and grabbed my hands putting them over my ears.  "they bought this book from the store and, well her friend got it on the computer online, but it's got real love spells in it and they used it on this one boy in their school, he's on their hockey team, and it worked!" she pointed at the ceiling. "Cause you know how I know it worked, cause he's her boyfriend now. Connie's friend. And they hang out with all these new kids at their school, that they didn't hang out with before they became witches, so there are real witches cause Connie's one and her friend is one." she looked at me making a motion with her hand to let me know I could uncover my ears.

Then Mavis grabbed her treat bag and held it up for mom as she screamed trick or treat. She was more then disappointed when mom told her she hadn't bothered to buy any treats. She ran over to me with her treat bag and literally shoved it in my face, it smelled like cat pee. I had nothing either to give.

On my way home, I stopped at the grocery, and there was a charity book sale. I was going to just pass by it, cause books I have mounts of, but the lady in front of me in line bumped into the rack of books that were near the check out, knocking over a bunch, and as I was helping her to pick them up, found a copy of The Bride.  I had to get it.  That's just too cool. I didn't even know there was ever a book tie-in for the movie. The movie from 1985 starring Sting.
Halloween day, finding a copy of a book based on one of the best Frankenstein movies around, dude how could I pass that up? And it was for a good cause. It was a breast cancer charity, so win win.


Monday, October 28, 2013

Monday 8:15pm post it note

Last night, my ear was burning for over two hours.  From just after 10:30pm EST till after 12:30am.  Who could possibly have that much to talk about in regards to me?
I hope it was just you Mr. Scratchy and your buddies.

Been a quiet week, with nothing but watching movies. No Mr. Scratchy, I did not see the ppv last night. I read on the social site that the Pack lost though. Very upset to hear that.

The fairy tale is nearly ending. I broke my number one rule the other day, got the two lead characters together. I wasn't going to do that, but the posts that I'd written hinting at that were some of the posts to get the most hits. So I thought, could lead to a good twist. If nothing else, it's an easy wrap up for one of the subplots.

Okay Herman, hope you read this and smile. Or smirk, or pout or something.

P.S. for some weird reason I want to ask how the left side of your skull is? And your left leg?  Like I've said before, I've learned to just say what pops into my mind, for better or worse.


Sunday, October 20, 2013

Bad Sunday

What is it about the people who live in my building and fried chicken?
I'll get to that in a second.  

Mom babysat last night, and Mavis was suppose to be gone by 11:30am. So I got ready, went over cause we had dvred a bunch of movies last night to watch today.  I got there 11am.  Mavis wasn't even dressed to go home yet. Too busy making a kite out of scraps of paper.
Okay, I get that mom let the kid stay in her pajamas because didn't want to get glue on everything. 11:20am and they start to rush around getting her dressed for her mom to pick her up. 
11:30am comes and goes. 11:45am and the phone rings. My aunt can't pick her up till after 5pm.

Well, guess I'm not getting to watch the movies today. Then I get sent to the grocery, okay not a problem.  Standing in line, and they switched the check out guy. New guy. Okay, not a problem. He was so slow, slower then cold molasses on a February morning, as my grandmother would say.  The guy was flirting with the 80 year old lady in front of me. Okay, I get it, part of his job to be friendly.
My turn, and as he starts his speal, I see the one thing that made me not want him to flirt. 

Jonny R.

He's another Johnathan. So there can't be any Johnathans left in the city now. That has to be it right? I've bumped into them all, have to have.

I'm getting ready to leave, then remembered I needed to pick up some tylenol. Back through the grocery to the pharmacy, and the pharmacist on duty is named John.  I broke out laughing to the point I got the hiccups.

Make it back to mom's with her groceries, and Mavis was waiting in the hallway, with a stuffed frog, that she proceeded to hit me with while mimicking the accent of that one wrestler from the rookie show promo. That was over a week ago we watched it, and she still remembers it.

Finally, get home, open the door to the building, and greeted with a large blast of pot smoke and the smell of really greasy fried chicken. Which by the way, was the same thing that greeted me yesterday when I entered the lobby of the building.


Cosmic joke = 200   me = 0



Tuesday, October 15, 2013

15th October post it note

Herman... Mr. Scratchy; 
caught up with last night's wrestling, what do you mean that Werewolf King and Rebel without a Cause lost their shinny?  That's not buddies, that's not fun game...I didn't want to see that, didn't need to see that.

Now that my disappointment for the day is out of the way... hey how are ya?

I'm at the point in the fairy tale where the lead female is going to end up with one of the heroes. There are two that could be a good fit for her. The character based on Mad Hatter...er um you...er Mad Hatter...um dude! I suppose it would be... or the character based on Dimmer.  Either way, would make for an interesting dynamic leading to the wrap up of the serial.
And yes, the serial is coming to a wrap up soon.

Anyways, Herman, I imagine you checking in right now, deep sigh, a sandwich in hand, the lettuce slipping out making a mess. Maybe a smudge of mustard on your cheek, rolling your eyes at me.  And in case I don't get around to posting you a note before Friday, there will be both a lunar eclipse and full moon this coming Friday.  Double the crazy.

and as always, hope I brought a smile to your face.

p.s.  for some really messed up reason, I want to ask you Herman if you bought new shoes? Yeah, I have no idea where the hell that came from, but I've learned to speak it when it pops into my head. I think I need an off switch for my mouth.

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

tidbits 9th october

I was at mom's for a bit yesterday, as usual, and she ended up babysitting. Mavis came into the apartment talking a mile a minute about school then stopped dead in her tracks when she saw me, dropped her backpack and let out a deep sigh.
Then literally opened her mouth wide, and ran to the kitchen. "If she's here, does that mean she made cookies? Or a cake?"

When she saw that I had not been baking, she scuffed over to the sofa beside me with a pout, trying to make me laugh I might add, and sat down beside me trying to get me to change the channel.
Only I wasn't watching "tv-tv" I was watching old episodes of wrestling on the DVR, cleaning it out for space.
I happened to be watching an episode of the rookie show right then. Mavis started to giggle and brought her hand up in my face. "...and you talk and talk and talk." leaned on my bad knee and was mimicking the wrestler's accent. "...and you talk and talk and talk...and talk...he's funny." 
I have to admit, I was laughing like a lunatic for a few minutes after that one.  It happened to be a promo the Pack were part of.

Mavis-:"His hair is so long! And his hair is really long! Are they in a hair growing contest? Cause I think he wins."  she jumped up and was tapping the tv screen on Werewolf King.  "But his hair looks like it might be long too. Is that a ponytail?"  she was referring to Rebel without a Cause. "Why do they have long hair? They're boys!"

Me-:"I wish I knew."

She ran back to the sofa, sat really still for another few minutes then brought her hand up to my face and started again to mimic the one rookie wrestler. "And talk and talk and talk...play that one again. He's still funny.  The guy beside him, he's got a lot of bruises." she meant GraveDigger

Me-:"Those are tattoos."

Mavis-:"Do those come off? Like the ones I had after I went to the fair? Cause that would take a lot of scrubbing."

Me-:"No, they're real, like mine. Don't come off."

Her eyes went totally wide then she started to laugh and dramatically fell on the floor holding her stomach, "I forgot you had one."  then got back up, ran to the tv and started to count. "He's got a lot of them. Pause it! I want to know how many."

At that point I was laughing so hard my face hurt.


Tuesday, October 8, 2013

When love gets in the way

I've mentioned before about liking the song "I put a spell on you". That old song from like the 1950's/1960's.
Well, I can't get it out of my head last few days. It's stuck there, no matter how many times I listen to it.
I've also mentioned many times, that I believe in a lot of things. I've seen too many things not to.  When you surround yourself with self proclaimed psychics and real shamans and voodoo priestesses, you would be stupid not to expect to see things. I'm a magnet for the weird, and I love it. Most of the time I love it.

And you're wondering what does the title have to do with that right?  Some might say, I've let my desire for real love get in the way of my spiritual search. Some might say that I haven't found that right love because I'm constantly on the look out for it. And some might even say, that I need to keep searching for it to find enlightenment.
Confusing isn't it?

It always comes back to that for me. No matter how you slice it, love is the missing factor, the driving factor in my life.
I get myself tangled up in the who's and where's of it constantly.  I was chatting with a random person last night on the social site, and they were telling me how they met their girlfriend, at the cinema.  It made me stop everything and try not to cry. As what they were telling me, was nearly word for word something I had written a few years ago in a short story. A story I had given up on because once I had written the meeting of the lead characters, I felt that was all that was needed.
It was really crazy. It literally left me breathless, not too mention speechless.

Add it to the weird magnet column.

So, it seems I can write the happy ending. Just not for myself. But with that said, Mr. Scratchy, Herman... I hope you read this and smile, nod, chew your bottom lip and mumble to yourself "that's my girl." while your buddy leans over your shoulder reading out loud, with a giggle and agrees with you, spilling his coffee carelessly on your jacket.

and as always, hope I brought a smile to your face.

Saturday, October 5, 2013

post it note 5th oct

My landlord was stoned out of his mind yesterday.  Went to pay rent which he never bothered to come collect, and he didn't even know what day it was, standing there spraying air freshener as if that could hide the layer of pot haze that was pouring out of his apartment like fog.  Oh my god.

Herman, Mr. Scratchy; how you been? I imagine you checking in today, tired, an extremely large travel mug of coffee in hand, going over your schedule for the week. I think you're dressed in grey today. Some grey like say your shirt. I think that if you weren't a grey type guy before, you've become one since reading my stuff. And a yellow hat, no idea why I think you have a yellow hat...wool hat. One of those winter knitted things. They're really popular here with guys. 
Okay Herman, I hope I brought a smile to your face today. I hope I bring a smile every day.



Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Tuesday October 1st

Mornings are starting to be the same lately.  Coffee, check stuff online that I missed out on while sleeping -aka the drama from the social site- then write or go for a walk before the seasons change and I'm stuck in doors, go to mom's to catch up on the shows she recorded for me the night before.

So, right now, coffee and checking online.

I had been wondering what I'd done to piss off Male Friend #1 the kid from Mexico.  He hasn't been talking to me other then to say hi.
Answer, nothing. I did nothing. He's been dating this chick he met at work for the last few weeks.
See, I knew it would have been a bad idea for him to continue his crush on me.  I was a blockage for him.

And then there is Male Friend #2 John.   The creepy guy everyone told me not to chat with anymore. I had commented on a topic of his, and he flipped out, removing me from his friends list.
And then sent me comments wondering why I hadn't replied to him?    Dude, you removed me remember? 

It's a new month, Mercury getting ready once again to turn backwards for a few weeks causing all sorts of trouble. 

Once again, there are no male friends in my life.


Even you my Mr. Scratchy seem to have gotten quiet on me, my scratches have healed. There has barely been any indication I'm on your mind much.  I hope all is well in your real world.

Coffee cup is empty, need a refill.  Take that any way you like.

Friday, September 27, 2013

27th Sept 2013

Well, I think I'm actually loosing my mind.

Two days in a row I've come home and there has been a strange perfume in the hallway between my living room and kitchen, and it looks like someone went through my laundry. A pair of pants were pulled out from the middle of the pile.
Here's the thing, my landlord is the only one with a key to the individual apartments. Nothing else seems to be disturbed. But it's unsettling.

Either that or I've got gremlins.  I'm rooting for the gremlins. Lest then I know I'm safe. Crazy but safe.

Speaking of going nutballs, was in the Halloween store earlier, just looking around at the displays. One of which is an automated haunted house in the back of the store, and the display of monster babies got to me.
There is a zombie baby eating it's foot, a demon baby with horns and a tail, and a vampire baby with a bottle of blood. They make horrible noises when you walk past them. Motion detectors.
So here's me, standing there looking at this holiday display, smiling at first at the demon and vampire babies and thinking, "yeah that's what my kid would be like."
Then I pretty much started crying.

What the hell?   I hate kids.

This isn't the first time I've gotten little mushy over the idea of a kid.  First time I've gotten mushy in the middle of a Halloween display over robot dolls... hence the loosing my mind part.

Every few years, I have a few weeks where I get like that. Thinking what if.  Just seems the last few times, it's gotten worse. Way way worse. Maybe it's true, no matter how settled in your ideas and values, there comes a time when every woman starts to hear that damned clock ticking away.

That biological clock needs to be smashed.



Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Bad dreams morning coffee

You know when something is on your mind to the point you start dreaming about it?  I've been having a few nights like that lately.

But my dreams, have been all about my fairy tale. I just finished the next big chunk on it. Give myself a few days rest from it, if my dreams can settle down.  I'm debating what to do with the two leads? If I take them where I think the readers want them, then the main conflict is over and there wont' be a story.
It's so weird though, the few times I've hinted at letting the characters go in a certain direction, that's been my biggest amounts of hits. Which is why I've been thinking a lot about the direction of the fairy tale.
When I write, I tend to dream a lot about the characters. You put so much of yourself into a story when you write, your own issues, your own desires, your own fears. It's no wonder I'm dreaming of the characters.
The big curve ball I had originally planned for it, just didn't seem to work. I ended up going in another direction, which has me half mad at myself for caving in. 

Well, Mr. Scratchy, Herman. I think it's time for a really large cup of coffee.


Saturday, September 21, 2013

post-it Saturday Sept 21 2013

Herman, Mr. Scratchy;
One question, left shoulder and left side of neck...what did you do?  I got strange pains again in the last two hours. And since I was only sitting watching tv when it happened, it's not my pain. So it must be yours. Ghost pains, got to love them.

Caught last night's wrestling. Loved that the Pack had more then half the air time. Still waiting for them to turn on everyone. I liked their storyline better when they had no sympathy for any of the others, including the bosses.

Saturday, Pluto and Coffee

Checking the newsletters I get, researching astrology charts, notes, and this is a time of scandals. Could explain the bad vibes I've been having all week. Then again might not.

There are times I miss being part of a coven. I really hate the word coven, like I'm not as thrilled with the word witch either.

I went with mom to her dentist appointment yesterday, and while I was sitting around the place waiting, this one delivery guy came in.  Really cute, tall dark hair, and waxed legs.  What now?
I've dated my share of bi-guys, but our city has become a magnet for them.  Yes, I am assuming stuff about the delivery guy, which I shouldn't. He might be an athlete. Might be a swimmer. Might be an actor? Who knows? Then again, he might be really really vain.

Don't bother trying to follow my train of thought, because I'm not sitting here making the post responsible, just free flowing babble. Over coffee.

One of the chats on the social site last night got heavy. Angry. I had to literally sign out of the site and just stop taking part in the chats altogether. It gave me weird vibes, I had this sudden feeling like I was going to vomit for no reason and made me mad. This is why I don't want to know about famous people's real lives. Back to that idea of scandals.

But anyways.

This is becoming a trend, the overly smooth men. Waxing and all. I have said once before I like the idea of men shaving their armpits every so often, but really, legs?

Well, Mr. Scratchy, Herman; must dash...my ear is burning so someone is talking about me. It's you and your buddies this morning isn't it? Talking about the latest part of the fairy tale. I know it, you love me.


Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Must be the Full Moon

Went to the grocery to get milk. Simple, one thing should have taken me ten minutes total to get there and back.
It took an hour. Seriously, everyone seemed to be standing in line at the grocery tonight. And the traffic was freaky heavy.

So I'm in the dairy section of the store, getting milk. I reach for the container, and this old woman hits me with her walker, on purpose glares at me and rips the door to the freezer out of my hand, shoves her walker onto my foot and elbows me.    I'm thinking, damn it's just a container of milk. 
Halloween candy is out, and as I'm passing that section, little kids climbing the shelves to get to it. No parents in sight.   And I'm thinking, if they fall they are going to smash their skulls on the floor.
Go to stand in line, and there are two check outs open. Express, and one regular. Just about to get in line for the express, when the chick put up a sign saying she was going on break. Get into line for the regular, and am standing there forever as this old couple had not one, not two but three big carts full. I'm thinking  I could just have my coffee black it won't kill me. But by then it was too late to get out of line, totally trapped between the old couple and a group of guys who looked new.  They were either college students or else the new crop of miners. Either way, there was literally fifteen, twenty-something men standing inches away from me, and I looked like something you would find under the sofa. 
It would seem a few of those guys must like sofa leftovers, because one was smiling at me the whole time, started blushing at one point looking like he was about to say something, when one of his buddies elbowed him.

Finally walking home, and the traffic was psycho busy. I was standing waiting at the damned corner for almost fifteen minutes just waiting for a break in the traffic.

Then thunder.  

It is the night before the full moon.


Tuesday, September 17, 2013

morning post-it Tuesday

Herman, morning... how's Rebel without a Cause's skull this morning?   After the ending of the show last night, I have to ask.

I am sitting here this morning, it seems like it's going to be a beautiful day out, but I know there is going to be bad weather. Sinus headaches for me indicate a storm.   Hope wherever you are today, it's a nice day.

I  just really wanted to ask how Rebel without a Cause was doing after the ending of last night's show?



Monday, September 16, 2013

Post it Note Sept 16th Monday

Sitting watching tonight's wrestling, having a glass of wine, chatting with a few people on the social site.  Everyone is ranting about the ppv last night and the current storylines.  And then there were those of us talking about Dimmer's pants. What does he keep in those pockets?
Everyone wants some of that topic. Seriously, it gets funny at times, weird at times, and I'd love to know how guys feel about that?    Do guys care that they get thrown into these Sex and the City style topics?

Anyways... Mr. Scratchy, Herman, I think you're checking in to get a laugh.  So... let me know if Dimmer ever decides to stuff elephants down those pockets.



Saturday, September 14, 2013

Ironically...

I just cleaned out some spam comments from the site. Ironically, two things 1) they criticized my spelling/typos when theirs was not good either. 2) they left a porn site link. 

They commented on not being able to tell the reality because of the spelling.  Starters, Canadian. Much different then American spelling, and yes I do have typos. If I catch a typo I will fix it. But the spelling is proper, I do have a dictionary and I do use it. My thesaurus too.  Oxford Canadian editions.
And as far as reality goes, it's all happened. Hence the note on the side about name changes.

Anyways, moving on...

Tomorrow is the monthly ppv. I'm firmly in favour of Mad Hatter, Werewolf King and Rebel without a Cause keeping their titles.  I want the Pack to win at all costs.  I did catch up with last night's wrestling, while at mom's this afternoon.  She is starting to get evil with it, cheering for Silverpants when I was clearly wanting Mad Hatter to win.

So Mr. Scratchy, Herman...win damn it!

That's about all for the moment.

Thursday, September 12, 2013

It's a Thursday?

Where did the week go?

Herman, how is your day?

I imagine you checking in, coffee in hand, just getting ready to go work out, run maybe.  I came across this quote about how not all witches are wiccan, which is so totally true, and thought I needed to come in and post  you something.  How odd that would make me think of you?

Anyways, Mr. Scratchy, I imagine you checking in, coffee in hand, a green sweat shirt on, and a magazine under your arm. I think you've got your iPod blasting out something from the 1970's, and you're somewhere where there is a tv set which is turned to the weather channel.

As always Herman, I hope I made you smile.


Sunday, September 8, 2013

p.s. height?

Herman, I have a crazy obsession with height.  I'm short, because of leg and back injuries, as I've talked about everywhere online, can't wear heels.  One side of my family are all 6 feet +, the men and women. Very tall.  The other side of my family, all under 5 '11. Short.
I've always tended towards shorter men. I find that both sexy and more of a convenience.  As far as writing goes, it's the one thing that can help show the "gaps" between characters.  He towered over her, she reached up pulling him down to her height for a kiss, he bent his forehead to hers,  etc.

I've blogged elsewhere in past years about the height of wrestlers and how I don't believe that half of you are even close to what you're billed at.  I noticed a couple of the wrestlers in the last couple of years, admitted they were shorter then they were billed. Cool.

What is it about society's obsession with tall people?  Specially tall men?  For well over a century, when a woman would describe her ideal man, three words came to play  Tall Dark and Handsome.  Why?  A tall man does not mean better. Usually it just means you need a longer bed and/or sofa for them to be comfortable when they sleep stealing the covers cocooning themselves in the blankets... sorry off topic flashbacks to an old boyfriend.

Lately, my tastes have expanded to taller men. All puns intended. Reflecting in my stories of course. Come to think of it, the last few guys I was ever involved with were all hovering around 6'4.  One used to smash his glasses on the door when he came over.

So, Mr. Scratchy...just how tall are you really?  

And I'm asking,  because I was watching one of the Pack's matches from few weeks ago when they appeared on the rookie show, and they(you) all looked the same height. All billed different of course, but all appeared...equal.



Friday, September 6, 2013

Post-it note 6th Sept

I got the date right tonight.

Mr. Scratchy, Herman, how are you tonight?

I imagine you checking in, a liquorice hanging out of your mouth. The good kind, the red ones. A cap pulled down on your hair cause you're not in the mood to wash it tonight, a Tim Horton's x-large double double in hand, dressed in those pajama bottoms and a very worn grey hoodie.
I think you're totally beat from work, are wondering why the lead guy in the fairy tale hasn't gotten the girl yet? 

I'm right about some of that, I know I am. At which point, you're grinning, dimples on show maybe a slight blush to your pale face? 

Anyways, Herman my little twist of barbed wire...hug.


Thursday, September 5, 2013

Thursday 5th 2013 SEPT

Was cleaning out the dvr at mom's this afternoon, and out of nowhere she says to me "Why don't you ever watch Skunk-boy anymore?"   Meaning The Celebrity. "I haven't seen anything with him in ages, don't you like him anymore?"

Mom paying real attention to the shows? Was the roof about to cave in on us? Did hell freeze over?

Me-:"I can't, he's not on a tv show on any of the channels we have anymore."  I left off the fact I haven't caught up with Company #2 in three weeks so I'm assuming he's still working in the Japan company.

This got me thinking about the stuff in life we get used to, the shows, the heroes, things in general that we sort of take for granted.  That got me thinking about changes, missed opportunities, staying stuck.

See, one big chain reaction.

Which has lead me back to wondering where I put some of my dvds from Company #2 that had The Celebrity?  I could use a dose of his matches right about now.



Tuesday, September 3, 2013

5:34pm Sept 3rd

Herman, knock knock.

I just wanted to post something tonight. Though I don't really have much to say.
I caught last night's wrestling.  I really hate the storylines right now. But anyways...

I imagine you checking in, sitting on the floor back against the wall, knees up, reading this. This and of course having read the fairy tale.  I think you love the fairy tale, I do.   I think you're sitting there, killing time before work, and thinking that you heard something in passing from someone about how the New Moon in a few days is going to usher in change, and right off smirked to yourself cause that made you think of me. Which of course would have made whomever was hanging around you at that point raise an eyebrow and ask what's up?

Okay Mr. Scratchy, I've had some strange vibes for the last two hours that I just can't put my finger on, like something bad but not earth shattering is about to happen. 

and as always, I hope I brought a smile to your face.

Sunday, September 1, 2013

Post it Sept 1st 2013

Was at mom's this afternoon, you know the usual, and my sister stopped in. She'd had a argument with her guy, and was just needing a break.

Sister- :"Men are so stupid I swear. He's been acting like I don't know what the last few weeks since he hurt his leg. But it's been worse this weekend and he refuses to go get it checked out. The more it hurts, the more he gets pissy with me. So I got into the car and just went for a drive."

Mom-:"They are all just babies. Every last one of them."

Sister-:"Oh and I told him twice to go to the emerge for x-rays, no tells me I don't know what I'm talking about. His mom turns around tells him the same thing I did, and he's like 'well, maybe I should'. Like I don't know what I'm talking about or something. I was ready to throw the coffeepot at him."

Mom-:"Give him some slack, he does all the work, all the cooking..."

My sister glared at my mom. "No he doesn't! He hasn't lifted a finger in god knows how long. No, I know how long, before football started. I come home from work, do the shopping for the week, cook all the meals, do all the laundry and the cleaning and what does he do? Goes with the kids to football. That's it. Hasn't done a thing in months."

Mom-:"Well he works hard all day..."

Sister-:"He sits on his butt in front of a computer. Works hard my ass. I'm the one on my feet all day."

At one point, I really wanted to slap my hand on the edge of the coffee table and count to two. Dude, there are rare moments like that when I'm glad I don't have a husband to be upset about.
And yes, our mother believes that my brother-in-law is god's gift to the world.  god only knows why?

Saturday, August 31, 2013

Can't sleep

It's after 3:30am here, can't sleep. I haven't had insomnia for awhile.  Ever have one of those moments where you doubt yourself completely?
Like you think you left the window open but when you go into the room it's closed.  It's one of those nights.

I don't know Herman, Mr. Scratchy, why I came in there right now? Maybe just to say good night to you...

Goodnight Herman, sweet dreams.



Friday, August 30, 2013

Post-it 30th Aug 2013

for some bizarre reason, my left arm hurts? I know I didn't hurt it, is it something on your end Mr. Scratchy?  Did you injure your left arm?
Hello!
Been a few days Herman. I've been writing. Now, taking a night off. Yes, taking a night off of writing, so there might not be a segment on the fairy tale before Sunday. Haven't made up my mind yet. Long weekend here.

Well, Herman, we need something new. Something filled with daffodils and sunflowers.

I think you're reading this, an eyebrow raised dressed in a pair of very worn dark jeans, bare feet, hair unwashed, and that cup of tea in hand. I once said I thought you used a mug with a sticker on it, I think I said Ninja Turtles but that was like two years ago and I'm very lazy not wanting to check the blog so lets run with it...I think you've got a new mug that someone gave you to replace the other one cause it broke. Yeah, I think it was knocked off the table and smashed, and you were given another cutesy mug to replace it with ...The Avengers on it, or Spider-Man.

Hope all is well in your real world. Smile, it's just me.



Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Editing sucks man

Was watching an episode of Sex and the City on tv while at mom's today. It was on one of the channels that edits the episodes to be able to air them at lunch time. Over half the show was chopped out of the airing. Which made it really difficult to follow, and if you are like me and have seen every episode more then once, it's annoying. 

Speaking of editing oneself, I'm getting ready  to take one of the main characters in my fairy tale through the emotional wringer,  so Mr. Scratchy, tell the rest of the Pack and Dimmer and whomever else in the locker room that is reading the fairy tale, heads up.  I want to say that I'm going to put my heroes through hell.
The sex, the betrayal, the blood curdling screams...oh yeah baby. My little written soap opera is really close to my heart

What is it about soap operas that makes people so addicted?  Seriously, you should know the answer to this, you work on/in one every day. Wrestling is the greatest form of soap opera there is because it's done with audience participation.
I'm thinking too much again. I'm in writing mode, and just thought I'd write a quick post on here before getting back to my fairy tale.  Working on the part for tomorrow's post.

Okay Herman, hope you're having a howling good evening. Smile, smirk and snarl babe. 



Monday, August 26, 2013

Post-it note Aug 26th 2013

Herman,
What ya doin?

Caught the show tonight, and have to say, the social site was a buzzing with giddiness over the whole topic of posterboy-ability.  Everyone has their opinion on who should be the identifying wrestler.
Me, personally, I think it should right now be Rebel without a Cause. Yeah I do.
I am always glad to see him given the spotlight as he was tonight. I did give a gasp at one point with the couple of falls he took. Every time I see his matches where he takes hard knocks like that off of heights, I wonder how he manages to survive let alone get up and continue?

Dimmer looked good tonight. There was a scene of pit stains but I think I'm the only one who bothers to look. It's good, means he has a flaw.
And it's always good to see Werewolf King with that evil smirk on his face during the Pack matches. He doesn't smile on camera enough. Why is that?

Okay, Mr. Scratchy, I imagine you checking in tonight, letting out a deep sigh, maybe a burp crunching on anti-acids. Maybe you had tomato sauce based dinner?  I don't know, first thing that popped into my head.  I think you are standing there, reading this, small smirk on your face showing this to your buddy, who is leaning over your shoulder reading out loud.
Caught you didn't I?  Anyways, I think you're unwinding for the night, and are checking in because you need that giggle factor. Dressed in a pair of shorts, grey of course, and a faded torn t-shirt.

The fairy tale... in case you haven't caught up tonight...oh-ho-ho my lovely twist of barbed wire, is getting sinister. Well, as sinister as I can get on a PG sanctioned blog. The character based on Mad Hatter, he's just hit a place of no return.

Okay Herman, I have to be  getting back to the fairy tale now, writing the piece that will be posted tomorrow.

As always Mr. Scratchy, I hope I made you smile. 

Friday, August 23, 2013

post-it Aug 23rd 2013

Herman,

How are you tonight?

I think you're checking in tonight, in between stuff.   Sitting there in those grey pajamas, eating oatmeal and having a cup of tea.
Something tells me this is a bad night for communication, cause things have been weird with everyone. Both online and in real life.

But this is me, reaching out anyways. Grabbing your... attention.

and as always, I hope Mr. Scratchy, I've brought a small smile to your lips.


Thursday, August 22, 2013

Dirty Laundry 31

My aunt, Walsh's mom was over for a bit tonight visiting my mom. Walsh came to pick her up, and hung out for awhile cause she wasn't wanting to head back to her over heated apartment. Whole reason I crashed at mom's last two days, air conditioning.  We had a +30C with a +38C humidex today, and I can't function in the heat.
Walsh caught up with the fairy tale while he was here.

"So you are going to turn it into a love story?"

Me-:"There will be grave robbers and a ghostly possession coming. And yes, I think it's time to let it lean that way a bit."  he shook his head at me then shrugged.  "You don't agree?"

Walsh-:"I wouldn't. Unless, you're trying to prove something." he elbowed me laughing. I glared hitting his knee. "It's so obvious where you're going with the character based on Mad Hatter."

Me-:"Obvious? Obvious to who? I've got a cunning plan in the works. I'm hoping that the few readers..."

Walsh-:"ie the Pack and Dimmer."

Me-:"...I have will be surprised by the romance. Few more readers then just them."

Walsh-:"Sorry. There's me, and Ben, and that one ex of yours. That's eight."

Me-:"You're so not funny. Few more then that; but anyways." I stood up stretching getting myself a cup of coffee. "Point being, I can't tell what my regular readers are liking the most. I thought the more paranormal stuff would be more interesting, which seems to get a lot of hits, but the few scenes I've done that are romance-like have gotten double the hits of the rest of it. And I've sort of written it so that all the male characters could end up  being the romantic interest, so it's not just one character that seems to get the readers attention."

Walsh-:"Open comments then."

Me-:"They are. No one leaves comments. Like ever. But..." I spilled my coffee on myself and mom's rug, which I had to quickly clean. "But, I saw something the other night, that made me think Dimmer might be getting a kick out of it."

Walsh-:"Dimmer?"  I nodded, pulling up the promo I was talking about. "How do you get Dimmer liking the fairy tale out of two words?"

Me-:"Shut up. I think he digs it. Think they all get a laugh out of it. I mean, there is so much more I'd like to write in it, but the blog is listed as a PG sanctioned blog. I can only get away with so much." I refilled my half empty cup. "If it was a proper novel, there would be swearing, more blood and violence, and by now at lest three sex scenes."

Walsh-:"That would be cool. I do like it, I think it's funny and I'm sure Mad Hatter does too."


Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Do we fear love?

Do we fear love?

When I say we, I mean society in general.  I was just watching a movie about a woman who survived an abusive relationship, and my mind wandered. Wandered to my own love life and past relationships, to my writing and some of the ideals we have, that I have about men and heroes/bad boys. To my current fairy tale. The metaphors I'm using in it, the iconic imagery I'm using to define situations. To deal with my own personal issues.
Cause that's what writers do. We try to deal with our personal issues, dissect them and fix what needs fixing in our lives, no matter what anyone thinks, that's what writers do.

I think I fear love. How crazy is that?  The thing I've been hunting for my whole life, that I've been dreaming of, whining about not having, striving for; I think it's my biggest fear.
And that fear has got to come from someplace.

The term, be careful what you wish for you just might get it, seems to be the quote of the week for me. Quote of the decade.

What happens if I find it?


Monday, August 19, 2013

Monday night 19th Aug

Night after a ppv, and of course the social site is hopping.  Came in here to post nearly a half hour ago, and keep getting interrupted.

We hit +37C humidex and I can't handle the heat. Came to mom's, have had the air conditioning running all day.
Which means, watching tonight's wrestling live.   And all I can think is, I need to get some more done on the fairy tale. I added a few new characters and thinking up a small twist.

Okay Herman, Mr. Scratchy, what's up?  Strange vibes, last half hour. I imagine you checking in right now, just cause you need a moment to relax. I think I give you that, given I make you giggle.

And Dimmer was just on tv and dude, I don't like the suit combo. Naked would be much much much better.
As you can tell, I'm just jumping topic, saying the current thing on my mind. It's one of those nights.

Interruptions keep coming on the social site, so I guess it's time to wrap up my ramblings for now.

smile, it's only me.

Why do we pick the wrong people?

I get a weekly astrology newsletter. Of course I do, it's part of the boo-bitchcraft. Anyways, today there was a lesson on how we can miss the forest for the trees. Talking about how sometimes, we need to fall for the wrong people in order to understand the real value of true love and friendship.
How people let us know how they really feel about us by what it is they are saying or not saying.

That got my attention.

Then I started to think, yeah that's me alright, always picking the wrong men. Which then had me thinking, nearly an excuse really, that I'm a writer I can romanticize any man.  Which, for a story is the ultimate gift, but for real life, an anchor around my neck.
But isn't that what all romance stories are based on?  Falling for the wrong guy thinking he's Mr. Right when he's really Mr. Wrong-Double Wrong? 

Let's look at my biggest influences,  Sex and the City  and all Jane Austen's works.  In SATC, all the characters have to go through horrible break ups, cheating, lies, before they are able to find the truth in the matter and their perfect mate.  The same thing happens in pretty much every novel ever written by Jane Austen, and the woman wrote them 200 years ago.
Mr. Wickham is the classic bad boy, a charming beautiful liar with gambling issues and hints at domestic violence.  Yet, all the women fall for him.

Are we not seeing the forest for the trees?  Are these stories really more a warning then anything else and we've just taken them the wrong way? Literally?

When I started this blog, it was because I had been actively dating and was aggressively disappointed and scared at times, by the guys that were coming into my life at that time. I had been blogging about it casually elsewhere on the internet, and that series of posts were my most popular. So I decided to dedicate a full blog to it. 

Then I stopped dating. Ironically.

I literally said out loud, I couldn't handle any more of the bad dates and scummy guys that were coming into my life, and just wanted the right guy. That I wouldn't date again until he came into my life.


You know the old term be careful what you wish for you just might get it... but if you've read much at all of this blog over the last few years, you've seen just how many Mr. Wrongs have come into my life. Usually by my own doing. Because I fell for them, they never fell for me.  The few times, pushed by others even when my gut told me they were a bad choice.  In the end, I'm the only one who it affected.

Which brings me back to the lesson.  When do you know that you're picking the wrong person because there is a warning that this type is not compatible with your core values/beliefs/heart and to therefore look again at what's really beside you? Or that you're picking them out of desperation?

I know what I'm truly looking for in life, it's just taken a lot of pot holes in the road to see the path isn't perfect. And when Mr. Right shows up, neither of us will hesitate.



Sunday, August 18, 2013

sunday 8:45pm Aug 18th

Doorbell rang about fifteen minutes ago, my cousin Walsh was standing there smoking.

Walsh-:"It's ppv night. I went to auntie's expecting pizza and the ppv but there was no pizza, no ppv, no you.  Just three old ladies laughing." he waved the smoke around.

Me-:"Yeah, mom's church group called her last night about coming over tonight, and since the Pack were only listed for the pre-show, I didn't bother to try to get her to order it. Being poor sucks."

Walsh-:"Yeah, caught that part online. Your man won." he grinned at me like a little kid would after finding their first dollar from the tooth fairy. "You can't say anymore it's not him."  I grunted. "Well, no ppv so I'd better get home give the kids a bath before bed." he tossed the filter of the cigarette then looked at me. "You okay?"

Me-:"Sure. Just all this time I thought it was The Celebrity, and it wasn't and then this all unfolded and you were right, I was wrong and now what?" I shrugged hanging onto the door. "And the damned crush has gotten worse and worse and don't say it, just don't."

Walsh-:"What, that maybe you were suppose to have a crush on him?" he gave me that grin again as he got into his truck.

Post-it 3:45pm

Afternoon Herman, Mr. Scratchy.

I imagine you checking in, tired. Your iPod on, a cup of coffee in hand. A slight pout on your face from stress, dressed in track pants and a dirty t-shirt. And I think it's dirty because you spilled stuff on it...soup maybe. 
I suppose I should say something like, good luck on the ppv...try not to bleed too much.

But instead, I'm going to say to you Herman, I hope I made you smirk and smile and giggle for a few seconds.


P.S.    what's your favourite vampire movie?



Saturday, August 17, 2013

Left side post-it continued

Caught up with last night's wrestling.  Sitting there, watching the Pack have a match, when suddenly I see Mad Hatter get smashed in the left side of the temple.

This was on the DVR (mom's dvr to be exact) so I had the chance to rewind and make sure I didn't see wrong.  Nope, didn't see wrong. Mad Hatter was smashed on the left side of the skull hard.

I dropped the remote. Which luckily, didn't break just sort of bounced.

What's ironic about it is that, Tuesday night, I was sitting here in my living room when I got what I call ghost pains.
These out of nowhere for no reason pains. They happen sometimes. Not like they used to few years ago, but every once and awhile I get them.  This made my ear ring, my eye twitch and water, my cheek feel like it was swelled up, my nose run, my jaw ache and gave me a headache for about a half hour. 

I posted Wednesday morning, flat out asking Mr. Scratchy what the hell he'd been up to Tuesday night around 10:45pm EST cause I knew something messed up had happened to the left side of his skull.


So...wow...Herman you're...


Friday, August 16, 2013

Bad idea

I was leaving mom's while ago, heading home, when this one construction worker who was cleaning up from the building next door started to talk to me.  Seemed innocent enough at the time. He asked if I knew if there was another bus that came down that street or if they were done for the night.  I had to tell him I had no idea cause they've changed the schedule.
He was cute, not drop dead gorgeous or anything, but cute. Tall, dark hair, clean shaven, tanned and tattooed.  He didn't tell me his name, just asked if I lived there or if I was one of the home care nurses?  Which is an odd question in itself given I was dressed all in black with one of my horror shirts. Not something a nurse would be allowed to wear to work.
Then I see what looks like my cousin Walsh's truck drive down the street. The construction worker's phone made a noise and that was the end of talking to him, so I came home. Barely got home when I got a message from Walsh.

"Don't waste your time on him. He's got three kids and two ex-wives."   so it was him who drove past.

Damn. Just my luck, finally get noticed for the first time in god knows how long, and he's the typical trash you find in this town.  Never did find out his name either.


Thursday, August 15, 2013

Two Too post-it

Was watching the movie The Mirror Has Two Faces, at mom's.  Cried my damn eyes out. I've been wanting to see this for awhile, but never able to find a copy. They had it to rent on demand today.  Is it bad that I really identified with the character?
Barbra Streisand plays this woman who is a literary professor, and ends up in a marriage of convince with a math professor. He is working on his next book and happy she's not attractive enough to distract him, while she's longing for romance. They do fall in love but not the way you think.

The whole film deals with the idea of how sometimes we fail to find love because it's not what we expect. How we get trapped by the well, trappings of beauty.

Then as I was leaving the building, bumped into Tarot Lady. Is it bad that I want to roll my eyes every time lately that I bump into her?  She was telling me about a client she had done a cleansing for and how the whole thing drained her so much and it was for nothing because two years after the fact, the client lost their job.

Um okay what?  You're shaking your head on this one too aren't you?  I know Herman, you are. The more I talk to Tarot Lady, the more I want to laugh.  Not in a good way either.
I don't know Tarot Lady is totally full of crap, or if she's doing what she does with bad intentions?

Anyways, Mr. Scratchy, I imagine you checking in tonight, grunting a "uhuhm" sound as you read this, wondering why I let things get to me? You're in an industry where I'm sure nothing gets to you. I mean, you have to be tough skinned right?  And most men don't let anything eat at their nerves.
I wonder about you Mr. Scratchy.  Do you have a voice to match the nicname? A smoky sound, or a smooth tone when you talk? Are you punk rock or jazz?  Are you blonde/sandy or jet black or redhead?  Blue eyes or brown or green? Tall over 6 foot, or closer to 5 foot 8? 
Okay Herman, I imagine you tonight, reading this with a take-away shake in hand. Maybe a burger with that.  I don't know what makes me think you would eat a lot of take-away, but I do. I suppose it's the whole idea of you being on the road all the time.  I think I might finally know who you are, and I've left my voice about it in the fairy tale. Good hunting hon.

Smile Herman, it'll make you feel better.


Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Left side post-it note

Okay Herman, Mr. Scratchy... what happened last night to the left side of your skull?
Don't ask why I'm asking, just deal with the weirdness that is me asking.  Timeframe would have been around 10:45pm EST last night (Tuesday Aug 13th)

With that said, hello Herman, how's your day going?  Sore?

I imagine you checking in today, chewing on a plastic spoon, a baseball cap pulled down over your face casting shadows. Shadows, always with the shadows around you. I believe you have a take-away coffee in hand, the cup is one of those brown coloured generic ones, very strong coffee. And some strange plastic wrapped snack...something as mundane as a twinkie.

And if I'm even semi right, you're either laughing like a lunatic at me or swallowing in fear. Either way, your buddy is leaning over your shoulder wide eyed, mouth open scared.

smile, it's just me.

Monday, August 12, 2013

Tidbits for Dimmer

You are a hot topic it would seem tonight on the social site.  But I have to say, catching some of the recaps on the website...what's up with the mustache?
That look makes me think of the Three Musketeers characters...like say d'Artagnan.  Just dude?  Are you secretly someone's stunt double?  Is it a job related facial scruff?  Did you loose a bet? Are you trying to win a bet? 

I'm sure whomever you go home to at night and share your life with can't like it? They must try to get you to shave that thing every chance they get? 

Dimmer, you're gorgeous, please shave that thing off.


Tidbits Aug 12th 2013

I forgot the power of a low cut top. 

I had to go with mom to the doctor's this afternoon, and I made the choice to not wear the same old horror film t-shirts I've been sporting for the last year and a half (I have eight of them) and broke out the tank tops. 
Dirty glares from mom. She put her purse up in front of my chest when we left her building.  Like what the hell?  I swear, I get treated like I'm 12 or something.
Three hours later, called a taxi to come home from the appointment, waiting outside the building, and this dude walked out of the building next door on his cell phone, turned around to walk backwards, tripped over his own feet, then continued on around the block twice both times looked back over his shoulder, said hi on the second round and then went to his building and just stood there for a moment, done on his cell phone. He started to walk towards us when the taxi showed up, then turned around and went back into the building.

Damn, can't tell you how much I needed that.  Little bit of staring goes a long way.

Friday, August 9, 2013

Just down the street

I was walking home from mom's after supper, and this dog ran up to me with a stick trying to get me to play fetch with it.
Cute dog, puppy, black with white paws.  Then I hear "Scooter come here. Scooter come here. Scooter...bad dog." I turned as saw this guy, his arms filled with boxes. He just moved in three buildings away.  "Sorry about that, he's a really friendly thing. You're not allergic are you?" he blushed.
I told him no, as I mentally cursed myself for once again being a total slob, and wishing I'd gotten that haircut I've been complaining I need. Why is it I always bump into cute guys when I look like something you find clinging to the bottom of your shoe?
"I'm Todd."  I nodded and told him my name, and I know I was smiling a bit.  He was about 6 feet, curly dark hair, greeny-blue eyes, and an old Black Sabbath shirt on, but most important, no wedding ring.
I was about to ask him where he's from when the door to the house opened and this skinny blonde called out to him.   So much for the no wedding ring part.  I continued on down the street and was turning into my own parking lot when I felt something smack into my leg. There Scooter was with the stick in his mouth again. Todd ran over and grabbed the puppy saying he was sorry, the dog was new he'd just gotten him.
"Oh you live here?" he nodded to my building. I said yes and I know I was blushing by that point. "Then I'll maybe see you around."   it was a statement not a question.

I haven't liked a normal average guy in a long while, just my wrestlers; have a bad feeling about this. Best to avoid at all costs.



Like a faceplant to the turnbuckle

Doorbell about a half hour ago.  I was still sleeping. Stumbled out to answer, and it was my cousin Walsh and some guy. It was starting to rain, they were dressed in work clothes.
They had a construction job in the area and since the rain put a stop to the day's work, they were on their way home.

Me-:"Why are you here?"

Walsh said nothing just gave one of his giggles. Didn't even introduce his co-worker. He flipped through a few of my DVDs. "We're going for coffee while we wait to see is they are going to call us back to work. Thought you might want to come with us?"

Me-:"You woke me up. Not showered, not dressed."

Walsh-:"Well, I asked. Caught up with the fairy tale. Who's the new character? Is it Jimmy Jacobs?"

Me-:"That would have been interesting. No, the new character isn't even based on a wrestler. I'll have to remember to add a character based on him for the other half. No I was thinking so much about the fairy tale that I was dreaming about it and saw this guy in the dream."

My cousin giggled nodding.  He had that look on his face like he's up to something again. They started to leave and then turned in the doorway leaning on it. "You sure you don't want to come for coffee with me and John?" 

Me-:"No I hate you right now."

They left, my cousin laughing, his co-worker John confused. Me wanting now to watch old Jimmy Jacobs matches.



Thursday, August 8, 2013

post-it Aug 8th 2013

Evening Herman. Mr. Scratchy.

I bet you're sitting there tonight, catching up on stuff, maybe a bourbon in hand.  I think you're working on that painting, listening to the sounds of the neighbours. Yes, I spell neighbours with a "u" because I'm Canadian and it's how we spell it.

Stop laughing. It's only slightly funny.

I'm assuming Mr. Scratchy that you've been to Canada. You must have given your job?  My city is crap, but the rest of the country is beautiful.

I was watching Mockingbird Lane  earlier. Really wish they had picked it up as a series. But anyways, it just got me thinking.  Thinking about scars.  Yeah, weird right? I mean even for me weird.  All I could think was that the way they handled the updated version of the character of Herman Munster, is how Frankenstein would have actually looked more so then the classic image from the black and white movies. Then I started thinking about my own scars, and the appeal of the original show back in the 1960's. The idea that anyone can find love.

Corny. But that's me.

Well my little twist of barbed wire, smile. My scars have almost healed.

Monday, August 5, 2013

Monday afternoon post-it note

Herman...Mr. Scratchy:
how are you?

I imagine you checking in right now, having dinner getting ready for work. Salad and chicken I think. I hope you've been one of the faithful reading the fairy tale. I think it's funny, so far.
As I was saying, I imagine you checking in before work, maybe you've got your iPod on, listening to your favourite cd, just finishing a photo shoot or something.  I tend to like to forget that part of the job...on purpose.
I don't know Mr. Scratchy, if you've ever seen the movie Grease 2 ?  With Maxwell Caulfield and Michelle Pfeiffer ?  It was one of our favourite movies back in the day. And when I say our, I mean everyone I went to school with in the neighbourhood.  But Caulfield played the character with the double life, nerdy outcast by day - cool biker dream guy by night.  That's the you in my head.  Nerdy Wrestler guy.

Okay Herman, keep smiling.

Friday, August 2, 2013

Another round of the J-word

I was watching a movie last night, and the J-word head count started up.  1 character named John, and in the credits 4 Johnathans.
Went to the grocery, and one of the new guys named Jon was working, as was the John-who-is-going-by-the-name-Josh because there are already 5 guys working there named John. He smiled and nodded when he saw me.
Walked into mom's place, she was on the phone and I heard her say "You mean John. Barb's brother...or was it her son? Weren't they both a John?"  

So, it's started again. The cosmic joke.

There is some poor unfortunate soul out there named Johnathan who is being bashed over the skull with versions of my name.  Poor boy, by the time he is thrown into my life, he's going to hate hearing my name. 


Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Ticket for endangerment

I was on my way home from the store, spotted this small crowd forming near the edge of the mall parking lot. Two cops talking to this couple. There had been a small accident.
The guy was totally embarrassed as the one cop was talking to him getting his statement, and laughing himself. Then the cop started to scream so that everyone in the parking lot could hear.

"You were not drunk?"  the guy shook his head. "You were not having a heart attack?"  the guy shook his head and was ten shades of red. "You were simply, distracted but you were not texting or using your cell phone?"  the guy was staring at the ground at this point. "And you didn't see the other car pulling out of the parking spot behind you because..." the cop turned to the chick who was holding her face in her hands leaning on the car. "...because your wife was giving you a blow job. Is that correct?" the guy said nothing just stood there. Both cops were laughing hysterically, the one who had been screaming for the crowd then leaned on the cop car unable to catch his breath. The crowd by this point was snickering and out right making jokes. The cop in charge then gave the couple a ticket. "I have to write you up for reckless endangerment. I'll give you a break and write you up for unlawful cellphone use."

At the time, everyone thought it was funny. I laughed. But, in all seriousness, something worse could have happened.
Dude, I'm all for spontaneous moments but really now. If you're going to have sex in a car, make sure it's not while you are driving.

Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Tidbits July 30th 2013

Last night, Male Friend #1-the kid from Mexico- started talking to me again on the social site. Right back with the flirting like nothing had happened. Then he complained because there wasn't anyone else for him to chat with.
I tried to get some writing done, so I wasn't really in the mood to chat. Didn't stop him. And he's dialed it up a few notches with the flirting. It's like the word no is not in vocab or something?

Speaking of writing. The fairy tale, is driving me nuts. I'm close to wrapping up most of the story plots, just have to get a handle on the character based on Dimmer. So of course, Dimmer is all I have been able to think about since last night.
Which by the way, I managed to catch last night's wrestling, and Dimmer looked good. Really good. Which is bad, for me it's bad.

I need to wrap up that fairy tale, it's way way off course.

Nobody wants to feel like they are the commercial break, everyone wants to feel like they are the main attraction.  I'm really feeling like the little cartoon of dancing hot dogs and popcorn that would be played out of focus to an empty cinema between double features.

Sunday, July 28, 2013

Post-it note 28th July 2013

Herman, Mr. Scratchy.
How has your night been going?  The weather has turned cold here to the point it feels like October.

I imagine you checking in tonight, draining the drudges of your tea cup as you do, literally looking over the edge of it at the screen. I think you're sitting there in your pajama bottoms, and a faded t-shirt. I imagine you to be exhausted from work.  I also imagine you've got a takeaway order of nachos beside you for dinner. The green onions and salsa sticking out of the cold cheese. 
Yeah, I'm weird like that.
 I also imagine you tonight to be snarling at me right now. I always try to have something for you when you check in. And the last while, I've been just not in the groove. I'm all about the fairy tale right now. I can admit it, Rebel without a Cause has my brains at the moment. Or at lest the character based on him does. I bet he's fun to have coffee with...

Smile Herman, what have you got to loose?

Friday, July 26, 2013

Friday, July 26th continued

I got a message from Walsh, asking me if I was alive?  Funny.

Walsh-:"So are you home or you at auntie's?"

Me-:"Home."

Walsh-:"So no wrestling then?"

Me-:"No. Catch it tomorrow. What's up?"

Walsh-:"Did you do anymore on the fairy tale?"

Me-:"Plenty. Sort of screwed it up, and have to figure out how to fix it now. But it's cool, one of the things I'm liking about writing this way. No re-writes when it's online. Like the way they used to write serials back in the day in newspapers. No doing six drafts to add characters or change plot lines, once the post is up that's it it's there man."

Walsh-:"Hang on, going to go read."  about a half hour went by then he messaged me again. "Cool. What's going on with your chat buddy?"

Me-:"Told him wasn't interested. He hasn't talked to me since. Totally ignoring me."

Walsh-:"You broke his heart."

Me-:"Oh please!"

Walsh-:"You did, just admit it. You crushed him like a bug. I'm glad I'm not you."

Me-:"Thanks."

Walsh-:"Just saying, no one likes to have their heart broken. Better break it now then when Mad Hatter comes."

Me-:"You're the one who was pushing me to get in with Male Friend #1. And there is still no solid proof that Mad Hatter is Mr. Scratchy!"

Walsh-:"Haha! There is you just won't admit it."

Me-:"I'm done whatever. Then why did he never contact me when he was in the indie companies?"

Walsh-:"Thought you just said you were done? Haha!"

Me-:"Done. Very done. Just think about it, think about it. I've said it before, the whole situation has been going on since late 2008 early 2009, so what's stopped Mr. Scratchy from contacting me? It's why I just can't wrap my head around it."

Walsh-:"Maybe he's shy?"

Me-:"And maybe you'll grow wings and fly away."


July 26th 2013

Was at the mall. Bumped into one of my female cousins who I haven't seen in about a year, and we chatted for a bit while she waited for her niece who was getting a hair cut. We were standing outside of one of the new remodeled clothing stores that just moved into the mall.

Cousin-:"What happened to Urban Behavouir?"

Me-:"Wasn't it Urban Outfitters?"

Cousin-:"Was it? No, was it?"

Me-:"No. Maybe your right. I know we had both stores, one in the mall, the other across the street from the hardware store. Either way, the one here is gone now."

We seriously have nothing in common but our dna. It was awkward, but nice. Her and I haven't kept in touch since our grandmother died which was 14 years ago. We bump into each other rarely. I went and did my shopping, and decided a Starbucks was in order.
So I'm standing there in line, and the chick making the coffee had her arms full of tattoos. We started talking, comparing notes on tattoo artists here in town and prices. I've been wanting to expand mine for the last year, but the artist who originally did mine moved away and I need to find a new one. So I got my coffee, and took the nearest table.
Suddenly I see the hot gay guy who was working the checkout part slide up to her talking, both giggling and blushing. I heard him say to her "go ask her, if you don't I'll do it for you." And they kept looking at me.
I got my bag, my coffee stood up and was starting to leave, when this guy who works at the sports store down the mall came in. I have been looking for an excuse to chat him up for months. But I didn't have a real reason to, just when I past him said "hi, haven't seen you in a while." as if were were old friends or something.

You never know what the day will bring you.


Tuesday, July 23, 2013

Post it note 23rd July

Mr. Scratchy, Herman.
How was your day?  

I caught up with last night's wrestling, and tell Dimmer that the outfit didn't shine like I'm sure he thought it should. Sure it must have looked fabulous in real life, but on tv, it was a miss. The pants just were too...well too much. And I miss the grey. Grey is the new black.

Unless you are Dimmer, in which case... speaking of last night's wrestling, tell Mad Hatter I noticed the haircut. Unless you're Mad Hatter in which case...

I think I've lost total ability to write horror stories. My fairy tale has a mind of it's own and seems to want to go the way of romance novels. There was a time when blood and guts and ghosts were all I wrote. Not so much anymore. I feel that if I let it go romance I'm letting everyone down who's been reading it this far.

I imagine you checking in to this tonight, hanging around your hotel room in your underwear, having just come in from the gym. You've got a cup of tea in hand as usual for your nightly routine. I imagine you pushing up those wire rimmed glasses I think you wear, having checked messages just before checking here.
I think you've had a wonderful day, and have a smirk on your pale lips.

As always Herman, I hope I brought a smile to your night.

now i've done it

Do you ever have one of those days where nothing you say is the right thing to anyone?
Yeah, it's been like that the last 24 hours.

From angry wrestling fans who are so devoted to their heroes it makes me look like the silent type, to crushes gone bad.

I pissed off an angry 15 year old girl in the main wrestling chat because I defended the PG-era, when she wants more sex on the show. I expect death threats any moment.

And Male Friend #1- the kid from Mexico- I told him I wasn't interested. Now he's not talking to me either. Yay me. One conversation and I'm in the dog house with my chat buddies.

You know, I can sit here and say everyone is over reacting, and on some level I'm sure it's true. But, at the same time, I knew I was pushing buttons and I did it anyways.
I mean the wrestling chat with the 15 year old. 

Male Friend #1 on the other hand... I didn't know what else to do. I actually started to wonder if he'd developed this crush on me because he's looking for the easy way out?

It's what I do.  Why I put so much energy into talking about wrestlers. At lest, that's how it started. There few years ago, I was so hurt, so twisted from countless bad break ups and just rotten relationships, that I started to put that energy into my internet wrestling crushes. Cause it was safe. No one gets hurt. They're famous, it's part of their job description.

Seems logical. I seemed like the easy way out for Male Friend #1. Then someone mentioned the Canadian factor and that really got me wondering what is really going on here?  Is Male Friend #1-the kid from Mexico- just looking for an easy answer to a Canadian citizenship?

Either way, I've pissed everyone off.  Starting to think it's the only real talent I have anymore.



Monday, July 22, 2013

Random Tidbit July 22nd

Was at the grocery today, and the goat milk dude was working. He walked out of the back room, nearly ran into me, then when he spotted me did a double take.
Is that good or bad?

And on the social site, Male Friend #1-the kid from Mexico- he asked me out again. Okay this is just odd. I'm in Canada, he's in Mexico and he keeps saying he wants to have dinner some time. I know he's planning a trip to Toronto, but I have told him a dozen times I don't live anywhere near there.
When I commented on the fact he might not like me in real life, his reply was that he doesn't go for looks he goes for personality.

Isn't that what all of us want?  Someone who can get beyond the shell?
And as wonderful as that would be, I have a difficult time believing any man can really see past the cover story to the article.

Friday, July 19, 2013

Friday Tidbits

Everyone wants Dimmer.

The guy must be feeling the love, seriously.  I'm hanging out on the social site, chatting with the gang, which now consists of six women, Male Friend #1- the kid from Mexico- and our new gay man. The topic, Dimmer got slapped. 
I caught the recap on the website. And what was the general response from five of the women and the gay man?  They all at the same time said they'd kiss it better.

Cliched. Cliched. But what an inviting idea.
The more air time Dimmer is given for his spotlight, the hotter a topic he's become.

And the things I wonder about are if the wrestlers are able to handle the amount of fame they suddenly get thrown at them? And can they handle loosing it if they ever get shoved into the dust? What does that do to a person?  Being the center of something like that and suddenly just not? 

Well Dimmer, I hope you're one of the ones who can both handle it and keep it rolling for years to come.
In the mean time, sweetie, you need to not wear so many layers of clothes under those hot lights because you had really bad pit stains. Just saying.

Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Dirty Laundry 30

"Are you okay?" Tarot Lady asked me when I was coming in to mom's.

Me-:"No. I am working on a project that no one cares about, I'm writing a novel that might never see the light of day, I'm having a difficult time on my short story cause it's taken on a life of it's own, everyone I have been talking to is excited about a comic convention and none of them can believe I've never been to one in my life cause I'm like the nerd of the gang, there is one friend on the social site who is upset because the men she's been talking to have all bailed on her because they all found out she was only 15 years old and for some reason she believes that one of them is only talking to me to make her jealous, and I've got my period. So no, I'm not fine. And I'm craving salt."

The look on her face was priceless because no one ever really expects you to tell them the truth when they ask you how you are.  You get the truth with me, so always be sure you want to know before you ask out of politeness.

Tarot Lady-:"That would explain the dark energy around your head." she said pointing to my ear. "But I was doing a reading last night, and I kept turning up the High Priestess and right away I knew it was about you. Then I felt something will happen around October for you, something you really want in life."

Me-:"No idea what that might be."

Tarot Lady-:"It's something important." she made a noise going to check her mail then turned to me. "Say, wasn't there a Johnathan? Didn't Timothy say he saw the name Johnathan in your cards?"

You know that cosmic joke raised it's head again.

Me-:"Uh huh."

She waited for me to say something more. "Well, okay then. It's time for my show. I bet that is what it is that I'm seeing, this Johnathan coming into your life in October."  she shook her finger at me like she was scolding me then went upstairs to her apartment.


Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Ah-man!

Hiding out at mom's. So to speak. She has air conditioning, I do not.
Mom was talking with sister about going to see a musical at the local theater. Sister screwed up her nose to it, said she refused to see anything that Sophia the Wannabe Socialite is in.

Me-:"She back in town? Thought she moved to Toronto?"

Mom-:"She's back for this play. Thought it would be nice."

Me-:"Why man?"

Sister-:"I don't want to talk about it. Don't want to think about it." she  gestured with her hand in a dismissive motion. "She's gone crazy. Like crazy crazy."

Me-:"She was crazy before she left."

Mom-:"Yeah but she's really turned out crazy. It's the group she's with."

Sister-:"Doesn't know what she wants, who she wants to be, or what she wants to be you know. Depends on the group she's hooked in with."

Me-:"That's rough man. But, totally for the better. Your friendship ending. Better for you man."

Sister-:"Man. Man. Okay man." she leaned towards me with wide eyes laughing. "Have you been watching Hunter S. Thompson movies again...man?" she laughed.

Me-:"Reading actually. Totally man, don't take any guff from those rat bastards! Fiends, Swine!"  I said in my best impression of Johnny Depp via Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.

Sister-:"I actually liked Bill Murray in Where the Buffalo Roam. One of his better ones."

Mom-:"Now you both lost me."

Me-:"You say that like it's a bad thing?"

A post-it note for you

Mr. Scratchy, Herman.  How was your evening?
The fairy tale, you're in it aren't you? I think you are. I was asked what I hope to accomplish by it, and my answer was for one wrestler to like it.  Just one. Two would be fabulous, three beyond wicked. But one is good.
I've got nothing tonight. I just typed something like four times and deleted it, so that tells you how brain dead I am tonight.
Okay Herman, I imagine you checking in to this tonight, tired, and feeling...complicated. Yeah I have no idea why the word complicated jumped into my mind, but it did.
I think you're dressed in a pair of shorts, and having that usual cup of tea while you read me.

Risk it here... things were less complicated when I still believed you were The Celebrity. There is that word again, complicated.
Now complication is the only thing happening. For now anyways.  The most likely possibilities are still Dimmer, Rebel without a Cause and Mad Hatter. 

And somewhere, The Celebrity is reading all this laughing shaking his head thinking he should have gotten the recipe for banana bread few years back when I offered. There's a guy who I hope never looses his will to be weird.

Monday, July 15, 2013

Still a Monday

I got a message from Walsh with the usual. I let him know I was at mom's and still not talking to him.

Walsh-:"Read some more of the fairy tale. Um..."

Me-:"Still not talking to you. And what do you mean um?"

Walsh-:"Getting a bit too romance like. What did I do?"

Me-:"Ruined my reality by telling me stuff I didn't want to know."

Walsh-:"Not my fault."

Me-:"Yes it is. Totally your fault."

Walsh-:"So you are actually watching the show tonight?"

Me-:"Yes. Why?"

Walsh-:"Your boys went back to basics eh?"

Me-:"Always."

Walsh-:"Anything new with your chat buddy?"

Me-:"No, think he's gotten bored. He's flirting with a bunch."

Walsh-:"Still think you should just date him."



Sunday, July 14, 2013

Sunday post-it note

Sunday. Wrestling ppv tonight. Decided after much debate that I'm going to order it.
Well, Mr. Scratchy, Herman, you might be wondering maybe where I've been this week?  Writing mostly. 

I imagine you checking in right now, having a cup of coffee, maybe reading the sports websites or something, sitting around in a pair of dirty jeans, getting ready for work.
I'm watching a movie that's set in the 70's, and there are real typewriters in it, and it makes me miss having a typewriter. I know I'm weird.


Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Two for the price of half

6:25pm. Heard the downstairs neighbour stomp up the stairs and answer the front door to the building. Walls are paper thin around here. This is the guy who's wife left him for abuse.
Could hear the sound of a woman laughing. Bottles clanking.
I turned on my stereo to drown it out. Didn't work.
A few minutes later, heard the neighbour once again stomp up the stairs and answer the front door to the building. Hear a second female voice.
By 6:45pm, could hear an extremely loud female voice in the final seconds of an orgasm. And I say extremely loud, because I could hear it over my Sepultura cd. That's loud.  Then heard water running in the pipes. The door slammed, high heels on the stairs and the front door to the building slam.
About a minute later, heard another loud female voice in the final seconds of an orgasm. Then once again, water running in the pipes, the door slammed, and someone running up the stairs and out the front door of the building.

It's 6:57pm. Just heard the neighbour answer the front door to the building again, and another female voice saying sorry she's late.

Oh my god.  I think I might have to switch from Sepultura to Cradle of Filth. You can't hear anything over Cradle of Filth.


Random 9/7/13

Sitting here, having a glass of wine. Merlot. Just got back from mom's where I was watching last night's wrestling. 
Cool to see Dimmer is getting his on air push, and doing so in shades of grey.

Was at the grocery earlier, there's a shocker for ya eh?  And one of the guys who works there stopped me by the dairy fridge and asked me if I was the lady looking for the goat milk?  Very odd, given he asked me the same thing two weeks ago. I had already said no and was moving towards the check out when I realized, the dude was using it as an opening line. Way to talk to women there guy.
He was cute, I should have lied and said I was.

Cute. Odd word when you think about it. Ironically, means such different things to people. Cute, to me has always meant more of a innocent charm. I'm famous for saying "aw he's so cute."  Which could mean the dude is funny as hell, or the type of guy you would expect to see as the latest heart throb on the cover of a teen magazine.

 

Friday, July 5, 2013

But the photo is great

Walsh-:"You owe me seven dollars." He said as I opened the door.

Me-:"What for? We haven't had any bets lately."

He handed me a magazine. "I bought you a wrestling magazine."

Me-:"I don't read wrestling magazines."

Walsh-:"You need to read this one." he said flipping to a page and pointing to the article. "Interview with Mad Hatter and guess what he mentions...barbed wire."

I read the paragraph. "Okay."   Walsh held out his hand. "I'm not paying you seven bucks for a magazine I never asked for, specially not for one paragraph's worth."

Walsh-:"Fine, then you can buy me a really expensive coffee."   I had heard this morning from mom that Walsh's sister was sick again. So, I know he's in deep distraction mode.  "So anything new with your little chat buddy?"

Me-:"Actually, yes. Well, sort of. More like a case of about him. This one chick on the social site, who I also talk to on the book site, we spent like two hours last night on the topic of Male Friend #1-the kid from Mexico-. I thought she was going to confess her undying love for him, but ends up, she wanted to tell me that he's been telling her about me."   my cousin laughed. "See, funny right."

Walsh-:"The kid's got a crush on you. Enjoy it."

Me-:"Easy for you to say. She showed me a bunch of chats and private emails they had, and he's got like twenty chicks after him but he keeps turning them down cause he said he's got and I quote feelings for me, end quote.  That's not right. Not right man."

Walsh shrugged still laughing. "Enjoy it. Just go with it, harmless."

Me-:"Harmless you say."

Walsh-:"What's it going to hurt? Have an online fling with him."

Me-:"That's just it, I don't want an online fling. I want a real relationship, with the right guy. I want the next relationship to be the relationship."

Walsh-:"How do you know it won't be?" he shrugged again.

Me-:"Um, you of all people even say you think the right guy is going to be a Johnathan. He's not a Johnathan."

My cousin got a text from one of his buddies and answered it, then said he was off to a baseball game. He looked at me with this large grin on his face, his eyes sparkling. "Speaking of true love, has Mad Hatter..."

Me-:"For the 50,000th time, Mad Hatter is not Mr. Scratchy!"

Walsh-"...yes he is." he put his phone away and got out a cigarette turning to leave. " Okay fine, has Mr. Scratchy told you his name yet?"

Me-:"What's that got to do with anything?"

He nearly choked as he took a drag on this cigarette, he was laughing so hard. "Come on, you really going to...you're not that f***ing stupid are you?"

Me-:"You're the one who seems to have all the answers to my love life. Yes that f***ing stupid."

Walsh just pointed once again to the magazine this time to the photo of Mad Hatter. "Think about it." I shook my head totally not getting him. "You're not stupid. You know what his last character was in the independent companies. Why do you think he went with it?"

Me-:"NO!" I screamed. Screamed so loud the neighbour opened his door to see what was going on.

Walsh was laughing so hard he was doubled over red faced. "Oh god, this has years of fun written all over it." he turned towards the neighbour still laughing. "Okay, I'm late the game's going to be started before I get there. Say hi to auntie for me."  he took off, leaving me standing there feeling like an ass. A total ass.