Between 2005 and 2009, I tried pretty much every dating site out there. And that was back when "dating sites" were a four letter word. They were still new-ish and considered something sleazy that only the lowest of the creepy did. Some of the guys were okay, and some of them should have come with a warning label. All eventually ended up becoming my most popular topic of blogging elsewhere on the internet. So much so, that good, bad and down right disturbing, my dating life was what kept people reading me. And hence, I decided to start this blog dedicated to just that.
Only, I got disgusted with the guys I was meeting and made the stupid choice to stop dating until Mr. Right came into my life. That was 2009, and I haven't been on a date since. Nor has Mr. Right shown up.
That really hurt to admit.
I've made it clear more then once that I just don't like sites like Facebook. I've done them, and just feel ugh about them. Yet, the world runs on sites like that.
I've discovered there are two types of men out there that seem to keep crossing my path. The guys' that are okay with the way I look, and the ones who are okay with my personality. The one's who I've gotten involved with over the years that are fine with my level of attractiveness, I've learned the hard way have all been uber sluts that have slept with half the city. Right, and the one's who I've gotten involved with over the years that have only been able to sleep with me when drunk beyond drunk, have always pointed out how not their type physically I am. Okay then. The slutters always seem to have an issue with the Occult side of my life. While the beer-goggle guys, usually don't.
What does that say about me? Better yet, what does that say about society as a whole?
With everyone around me poking at me to not just try dating again, and to try facebook again, to add more photos of myself online etc; it's got me thinking. An experiment of sorts.
Which would mean having to face some pretty big fears I've developed in the last few years. The fear of actually dating again being the biggest. The fact I'd have to start bothering to put on make-up, dress in something other then yoga pants and over sized shirts, admitting that I would have to *gasp* buy new bras and wear them...etc. Then the hard part, dealing with the rejection, the hope, the anticipation of an email/text/call from a guy, the getting to know you part, the when do I tell him the bookcase of stuff is an altar...or I could straight up advertise myself as a witch. And I'll let you imagine for yourself how badly that could end up going.
Not everyone is open to that.
After just loosing a friend because our religious beliefs were polar opposite, and having Mr. Freeze whispering to his co-worker when I walked past him this afternoon in the grocery (ironically wearing make-up) I'm tired of tip-toeing around. Tired of living less then half my life.
Should I bother jumping into this?