Post-it 1am-ish

Wound up. Listening to iPod mix, there is a smell of burnt popcorn coming from someone in the building. Had an odd call just as the ppv was starting, about doing tarot readings at the next psychic fair.  Might do it, we'll have to see what the cost of running a booth will be.
Very happy that the Pack won. At one point when they were coming to the ring, it looked like the Mad Hatter was about to start dancing to the theme music, then stopped cold, like he remembered his character is suppose to be uber serious.
Heard from the Musician this afternoon. Haven't heard from him in what, a year? Then today out of nowhere he emailed. I swear it was just one whacked out day. I mean, between the whole thing with Pizza Dude, the tarot lady and everything. It's nights like this I just have to wonder...

Mr. Scratchy, Herman, I have no idea if you're checking in tonight or not, but if you do, just wanted to say hey.

Hey.
I imagine you having a few beers, dressed in jeans and a leather jacket, no shirt, no shoes, those wire rimmed glasses off, checking in after either being part of the big ppv or having been there with a buddy who was. Maybe you're rolling your eyes at me for mentioning the Mad Hatter, wondering what song is on my iPod right now.   (Love Like Mine from the Nashville tv show soundtrack)

Tomorrow, back to the projects I've been ignoring all week, and try to finish another four chapters of the novel's first draft.  Need to get the first draft done before I overdose on the Mad Hatter and stop liking him. That always seems to be when I get writer's block. When the shine of the crush wears off.

Herman, dream of  blue martinis and discos.

The Pizza Dude continued

Went over to mother's for the weekend because I've managed to worm my way into  getting the big pay-per-view. My aunt was there for the afternoon visiting. This would be Walsh's mom, my uncle's first wife. Walsh showed up with his niece and one of her friends, to pick up his mom, and when I mentioned the pay-per-view, he decided to stick around for awhile.
The girls are both fifteen and were at first bored with hanging around my mother's.

Mom decided to order dinner. Right away, Walsh's niece, Connie, came to full attention and asked if we could order from this one pizza place.  Which is where we always order from.

Pizza arrives, and Connie screams that she'll answer the door.  Her friend was a half step behind her, giggling.  The door opens, and standing there is the same pizza delivery guy from the other day, Johnathan.

Connie-:" Hi. I'll take it. Hi."  she was blushing and I noticed she tucked her hair behind her ear.

He looked at me, then at the rest of the family all scrunched into the tiny apartment and then checked the last name on the delivery slip.

Johnathan-:"Did you move in the last few days?"

Me-:"Nope. Just visiting everyone."   He stood there for a few seconds longer then needed.

Johnathan-:"You getting the wrestling in a few hours?"

Me-:"Isn't everybody?"  the sentence was out of my mouth before my brain caught up with me.

Johnathan-:"I might order the replay, have to work tonight. Who you cheering for?"

Me-:"the Pack."

Walsh mumbled something then elbowed me. "She's itching to see them, they're her guys. Specially the Mad Hatter and the Rebel without a Cause."

If my cousin wasn't thirty pounds heavier then me, I would have killed him just then. Walsh put his shoes on, grabbing his jacket telling me he was going out for a smoke and asked if I wanted to join him. Translation, get your ass outside so we can talk about everyone in the apartment without them knowing. Walsh's sister was his best friend and it's really clear that he's missing the way things used to be, because he's acting lately with me the way he used to act with her. If she ever actually gets her life back together and they patch things up, I'm going to be on my own again.
 
We got outside just as Johnathan was pulling out of the parking lot.  Walsh dug his cigarettes out of his pocket, red faced from laughing, while I was spotted by G-Babbs walking her dog.  I ended up chatting with her for a few minutes while Walsh just stood there.

Walsh-:"That's the guy? ------'s cousin?"   I had given him the run down the other night when he'd stopped by with the dvd and the youtube video.  "You know what he thought just now right?"

Me-:"Oh whatever."  It was my turn to blush like a beet.

Walsh-:"I bet you five bucks the next time you see him, he asks you out."

Me-:"Oh come off it. He's like what twenty-three, tops."

Walsh-:"Doesn't matter. He obviously knows how old you are. When he asked if you'd dated what's his face back in high school, he was checking to make sure you hadn't f***ed him. Cause he wants to ask you out. Five bucks."

Me-:"This is one time you're going to loose.  You're on. Besides, there might not even be a next time. He's a delivery guy, who knows who will deliver the food next time?" I was feeling anxious.

Walsh-:"What's wrong with you?"

Me-:"I want to work on the novel but I can't while I'm here. It's like having withdrawals or something.  Barely get five minutes to do a damned blog post, mom is always looking over my shoulder when I write. Literally."
He shook his head at me rolling his eyes. We stood there for another few minutes while he finished his cigarette, then headed back in before all the pizza was gone.

Walsh-:"Is this what we're in for with the girls once they get that age? Totally boy crazy?" He was meaning his own daughters.

Me-:"Yes. She'll grow out of it."

Walsh-:"You still haven't."  he laughed again at me.

Me-:"I write cheesy romance novels being boy crazy is a prerequisite."  The second I opened the apartment door, all I heard was Connie's voice as she talked about how great the pizza was, and how fast it had been delivered. Then around a mouthful of food, she asked me how I know Johnathan?  "I order a lot of pizza."

Connie-:"I like bet he's the best delivery guy there."  she was just giddy over him.

All I could think was, great another me in the making.

Post-it April 6th

Herman, you out there tonight?   Just taking a short break from the writing, and thought I'd swing you a note.
Hi, how are you?  Don't think I've asked you in a while.
I was once asked by Nura, why I thought you tuned in and read me?  I had told her that I didn't truly know. That it must have been because I wrote about you, or the industry in general?
Then, I just figured you got used to me. I became a part of you're routine, gave you a laugh, made you smile, that you found me endearing and witty.
I still believe all that, I mean I have to or I'd loose faith. It's weird, these notes to you have become such a part of my daily life and I still have no proof of who you are. I have guesses, I have clues but nothing solid.
I think you make my real life easier. As odd as that's going to sound. Just knowing you're on this planet, reading, snarling at me, laughing and... anyways, hi.

I can picture you tonight, checking in, maybe after a late night run. I think that you've got so much going on right now, that you're so turned inside out, you need something comforting. So, maybe a large cup of tomato soup and me.  What, a girl can dream can't she? 

PartyGirl and some guy just came into the building, sounds like they dropped a some bottles, and from the smell coming now from the hall, I'm guessing it was a full case of beer.  The joys of living in an small apartment building.

I hope I make parts of your real life easier too. I would hope that, that is one of the reasons you read me. Because with the life you have, people wanting pieces of you constantly, it must be lonely? 
I believe, you're a nerdy sort of guy. Which I've pointed out many times before.  Nerdy with a hint of Raoul Duke. I know, that's like the strangest mix, but hey, you know by now from the last how many years, that I'm a strange mix myself.  We all have many sides to ourselves.

Well Mr. Scratchy, I should get back to my novel, while I still am in the mood tonight to write. I have to wonder if you're one of the guys I've been inspired by?  Have I created a hero or villain or sidekick around you and not even known it? 

Well Herman, Mr. Scratchy, when you're ready... until then, dream of movie popcorn and white roses. 

Dirty Laundry 24

"I don't understand why you never got into this guy before?"  Walsh said.

His step-mom had sent over this dvd for me to watch on positive affirmations. Don't know if I ever mentioned that she's a life coach and reiki teacher.  I let Walsh read what I've written so far of the new story I'm writing.Then we started talking about the big pay-per-view this weekend. Which once again, brought us back to the member of the Pack, who has been the inspiration for my lead character in my new story.

Me-:"Me either."  I'd seen photos of him before and thought he was cute, but up until the Pack, I hadn't seen any promos or wrestling footage of him.  "Why are you here anyways, isn't it like way past your bedtime?"

Walsh-:"I'm not in the mood to have to listen to my wife's friends. Debbie and Janice were over for girls' night, so I went to see my dad. Anyways, I was watching some of his old stuff."  he took my computer "You really have to get over your hatred of google."  he poked me in the ribs. "Google is your friend. Okay look this here. The crazy stuff this guy does; totally up your alley, I really don't understand why you haven't gotten into him before?"

Me-:"You just said that. I don't know, one track mind? I was very very loyal to The Celebrity and The Other Guy for years."  I think I became too loyal, as Walsh is sort of right. I stopped paying attention to everyone else in the business. There was a time, I would have known everything about every wrestler in every company.  But the last few years, I focused on Company #2 and that was about it. "Okay. And?"

My cousin shrugged blushing. Which means he's got something up his sleeve.

Walsh-:"And, I'm going to tell you that this new story is the best thing you've written in years? Would that make you feel better?"

Me-:"No. But thanks for that." 

I don't know if it's the best thing I've written in years. I just know that since seeing the one promo the other week, I've been on this creative roll. I haven't done anything else. Sometimes that's all it takes, one look, one outfit, one gesture, one monologue, and it sparks something.
I plan on riding this wild obsession till it burns itself out. I just hope I get the damned first draft finished before that happens.

I watched the video Walsh pulled up on youtube, and all I could think was that the Pack member would make a wicked Mad Hatter.

The pizza dude

The last couple of times I've had delivery, it's been the same guy.  Short blondish hair, blue eyes, nice arms. My doorbell rang just a bit ago, and the same pizza dude was standing there.  Only, I didn't order anything.
It was for the guy across the hall. He rang the wrong doorbell by accident. As I was about to go back into the apartment, he started talking to me.

PizzaDude-: "You used to date ---------- in high school right?"

Me-:"Uh no. I was friends with him, we had English class together, but we never dated."  

PD-:"Oh?" he turned deep red. "Just I've seen you're photo in the school year book. He's my cousin. He's mentioned a few people from high school. A lot of girls seemed to be 'friends' with him."

Me-: "Um sure."  and I'm thinking, that was 20+ years ago, I don't look anything like I did back then so how could he possibly know me?  Then he moved around me to knock on the door of the guy across the hall, turned back to me.

PD-:"I'm Johnathan by the way." he gave the neighbour his order and headed back down the stairs then turned at the door, coming back up them half way. "I'll have to tell him I bumped into you. I know he's read your blog a few times. I've read it a few times too, but he's the one who's big on wrestling."

The guy was just standing there for a few seconds his eyes closed babbling.  When he finally left I was laughing my arse off. 

Me-:"holy hell, what just happened there?"

F minus

You hear all the time from actors how difficult and embarrassing it is to do a sex scene.  Between being semi-naked or even all naked in the scene, having the crew and director watching, and trying to make it look inviting, all without going too far.   That would be a trying afternoon. 
Double trying if your scene is the first scene on the production with your co-star. Basically a stranger. Ouch.
And I can only imagine it would be ten times worse if your co-star is your real life husband/wife because of the actual turn on factor.

Then there are those of us who write the scenes.

Be it for a book, play or movie, they can sometimes make you want to give up and toss yourself into a ditch.  And other times they are the easiest scenes to write. Sometimes you can totally picture people reading the scenes and getting a kick out of them, and sometimes, you wish you could take the scene back even after people have read it.

I'm at the point tonight in a new story I've been working on where I wrote the sex scene, deleted it, wrote another one, deleted it, added it again, took it from the lead character and gave it to the secondary character, took it from the secondary and gave it back to the lead, and now as I am having a coffee break, the whole thing is on my mind.

For the story I am writing, there needs to be at lest one sex scene for it to pan out and work, as it's about a relationship.  I'm just not sure I want to take my lead character there?

When is it necessary to have the sex scene and when is it not?  To f*** or not to f*** that is the question.

It's almost like having a relationship for real, there comes a time when you have to make that decision and decide if the relationship will move forward or not?

Snoresville

"Oh my god! He fell asleep!"  

This was the panicked words I received from one of the girls I have been talking to on the book site, in the SATC group.  I broke out in a mad fit of laughter for more then a few minutes as I read it. She'd just gotten into a new relationship and this was only the second time she's been with her new boyfriend.
I have to admit, even for me this is a first. I've had situations where the wrong name was called out, where the condom has slipped off, where the guy just could not get it up, and even been on the receiving end of a man who couldn't wait.
But I've never had a guy fall asleep while in me.

I didn't know what to tell her.

Some of the others in the group were asking all sorts of questions about his work, his health, his hobbies, but none of them had any advice either.  The best anyone was able to do was assure her that it wasn't her, it was the hours he spends for his job.
But, that's not what any of us were thinking.