After midnight post-it

It's moments like this I miss having someone to talk to. I got spoiled by one ex who used to email and call at all hours when he wasn't here.  I miss the pillow talk I used to have with a few other exes, and the general conversations with former internet lovers (okay and the phone sex I admit)

It's these really quiet nights when no one in the building is making noise, when there is no breeze coming from the open windows, and it's too warm to do anything but talk. (or in the winter when it's too cold to do anything but snuggle)

It's nights like these that drive me a bit nuts with loneliness. It shouldn't, but it does.

That's when the real intimacy would happen. In those late night talks, when everyone's guard is down and that comfort level has been reached.

Mr. Scratchy, Herman; I have no idea if you will see this tonight, but if you do...

More after supper coffees

I was leaving mom's this afternoon, when Mavis was being dropped off for her to babysit. Walsh looked like he'd been through the wringer, still dressed in his work clothes, covered in sweat.

"Two questions. One, any new progress with that chat buddy? And two, your fairy tale, feels like you're setting it up to have a big love triangle. Are you cause it would be too much like your other stuff if you do."

Me-:"No, not going to have a love triangle. There is only so much I am allowed to do given it's on the thing. And no nothing new with the chat buddy."  I walked out with him as he headed to the truck, stopping long enough to light a cigarette. "Do you like the fairy tale?"

Walsh-:"Yeah. Reminds me more of the stuff you used to write back in high school and college. The paranormal stuff. You should create an uncensored version, really let yourself go. It's too constrained. I know, it's online and the rules and stuff, but still, would love to see it uncensored. The character based on Mad Hatter, favourite so far. No love triangle, please."

Me-:"I just said I wasn't going to god. No one listens to me."

He took a long drag on his cigarette, blowing the smoke in my face. "What? I wasn't listening to you." he started laughing like a lunatic. "Your paranormal stories were always better then your romances. Always. Even when we were little, your ghost stories were entertaining."

Me-:"Why does this feel like a trap?"

Walsh-:"Not a trap, just saying I think you do better with horror stories. God, learn to take a compliment for what it is. Not everyone is mocking you when they say something nice you know."  He tossed the filter onto the ground and got into the truck. "Oh and P.S. Ben, likes your fairy tale too."

Me-:"Ben?"

Walsh-:"That new guy at work I wanted to introduce you to. We were reading the story this morning on lunch. He thought it was funny."  my cousin grinned at me like the cat that ate the canary as he started his truck and started to pull out of the parking lot.

Can't handle that

9:45pm, I get the usual message from my cousin asking if I'm anywhere near a tv broadcasting tonight's wrestling?  My answer also the usual, no I'm at home have to wait till I get to mom's tomorrow. Plus, bit upset that the sports channel here is changed and it does not look like their website will carry the replay anymore. Which is how I usually watch it if I can't get to mom's. I usually catch the online replay the next day.

But that's actually not the issue on my mind tonight. I gave my cousin Walsh the link to Male Friend #1's profile on the social site. He updated his id photo.
This is the 'kid from Mexico' who has been flirting with me  for the last few months. Well, not just me, he's been flirting with a lot of girls on the site, but all for nothing because he's got such low self esteem.

Then, tonight he threw me for a major loop. He posted a new photo of him in a leather jacket, his hair cut, holding a guitar. And he does not look like the little 17 year old goth kid we all thought he was. He looks like a grown up 29 year old that he's been telling us he really is.

Walsh-:"Haha! He looks familiar."

Me-:"Sort of like that one dude in high school."

Walsh-:"Yeah, sort of. Wow, he's got five new friends on his friends list just in the few minutes I was reading his profile."

Me-:"All women right?"

Walsh-:"For sure. But you're not jealous are you? I mean you've been talking to him for months now, and you haven't shown any interest so you are not allowed to now."

Me-:"No...maybe?"   I informed Walsh that Male Friend #1 is also a photographer and a video game designer.  Two things I'm hoping Mr. Scratchy is into. "Then there is the dog too."

Walsh-:"Dog?"

Me-:"Remember I told you like over a year ago about this dog I had a dream about."

Walsh-:"No. But continue."

Me-:"I had this dream about a guy with a dog, only I couldn't see the guy's face, but I saw the dog in perfect detail. The dog, he showed a photo of it the other day on his Flicker, the dog is the exact type from my dream."

Walsh-:"So, he likes you? He's the one who was all hurt cause he thought you were rejecting him before right?"

I started laughing. Like this weird fit of nervous laughter that came over me for no real reason.

Me-:"He likes wrestling, that's how we started chatting to begin with, loves vampire movies, and now all this."

Walsh-:"But you're not starting to think he's Mr. Scratchy?"

Me-:"No. Mr. Scratchy is a wrestler. Or at lest in the business. Company #1, I'm sure of that much. Plus the whole Johnathan thing...he's not a Johnathan. But there is the fact that he's the height I prefer, hair and eye colour too."

Walsh-:"Uh huh. You're so screwed."

After supper coffees

"Okay, I want to know about the fairy tale. What's going to happen in it?"  Walsh asked. I had gone to Starbucks on my way home from mom's and Walsh was there with his wife and kids.

Wife-:"What fairy tale?"

Me-:"Uh just this thing I'm writing."  She nodded and seemed to be waiting for a better explanation. Sipping my coffee, I started playing with a sugar pack. "I just added a new chapter last night..." Walsh nodded sipping his own iced coffee. It's weird, I can sit here and type about almost anything, but just discussing my work like that in person with people, freaks me out. "...okay so we've got the character based on Werewolf King, he's the strong silent type right, and he's going to end up having a big secret. There is something he knows that no one else is aware of that's going to play big time down the road. And the character based on Rebel without a Cause, he's the sweet innocent one..."

Walsh-:"Why though?"

Me-:"Cause someone had to be the sweet innocent one, and the character based on Mad Hatter just didn't jive for it."

Walsh-:"Jive?"

Me-:"Yes, jive. You said you wanted to know so let me talk." I nearly swore but caught myself remembering the kids were right there beside us. "And of course you have the character based on Mad Hatter. He's totally...Mad Hatter."

My cousin giggled nodding, his knee bouncing which tells me that he was wanting a cigarette.

Wife-:"This going to take long cause we should get going." she didn't even look at me.

Walsh-:"Can I have a smoke first?"

Wife-:"Half. Hurry up."

He and I went outside for a few minutes so that he could have a cigarette and I could talk to him freely.

Me-:"How do you have half a smoke?" I asked stupidly.

My cousin shrugged and told me to hurry up with my story. "I see you made the Mad Hatter character hate the girl. Why?"

Me-:"You read wrong. He doesn't hate her, he just doesn't know what to do with her in the first half. She makes him uncomfortable. Is that what you really wanted to talk about or is something up?"

He shrugged again, blowing smoke over his shoulder. "Did you catch the promo on the website? What was up with Rebel without a Cause in that?"

Me-:"Wanted to be noticed I suppose. Showing off a bit."

Walsh-:"Seemed like it. Seemed like he couldn't sit still."

Me-:"I know that was strange eh? Showing his butt to the world for no reason. Maybe he just wanted to prove Mad Hatter isn't the only one with a nice butt and killer arms, and nice hands..."  my cousin tossed his cigarette that was not anywhere near finished and nodded to me. I heard the kids then behind me.

Walsh-:"I gotta go. I'll talk to you soon. Say hi to auntie for me."    I nodded turning to head home myself. 

Must be a Friday

"Are you watching the show?" the text from Walsh said.

I officially think this is my cousin's catch phrase. Seriously, if he was single this might even be his pick up line. Not that I could ever imagine him single. He's been with his wife for almost twenty years.

Me-:"No. At home, you know the drill. Why what's up?"

Walsh-:"Boring tonight. Oh, and your boys lost."

Me-:"Damn you and your spoilers! Yeah, think they're getting ready to have them drop the belts."

Walsh-:"Hahaha! They can't be gods forever."

Me-:"I know. But, doesn't mean I have to like it. I'm not liking much as of late. They just brought the Vlad the Impaler look alike back to the rookie show this week, so that I'm happy with."

Walsh-:"Okay what's wrong?"

Me-:"Nothing. Just a little restless. It's summer and I don't really want to be home alone all the time."

Walsh-:"You could always order a pizza dude haha!"

Me-:"Not funny."

Double J-word

I was at the grocery, standing in line forever, cause I forgot about it being a long weekend and the store being closed for half of it. Everyone was there today it seems. By the time I got to the front of the line, a new checkout guy took over while the first checkout guy went on break.
Great. But, he was speedy.  I noticed his name tag said Josh. 
The checkout guys always make it a point to check the name if you have a points card or use credit cards, and tell you to have a great day then whatever your name is.  I've gotten into the habit of thanking them, and calling them by their name as well.

Josh.-:"Actually, it's John, but there are like five John's already working here so I said I'd use something else so that it's not totally confusing."

I know I had a stupid look on my face because he then raised an eyebrow and sort of leaned back a bit.

The cosmic joke has gone on long enough, I wish whomever the mystical Johnathan is would just appear already, cause this is getting beyond ridiculous.

Post-it Notes 26th June 2013

Herman, Mr. Scratchy;  having a few issues tonight with the blog. Driving me nutballs.
How is your night going? 

Working now on the second draft of the novel. Time to give some focus to the best friend character, the one who Rebel without a Cause was the baseline for. He gets seduced a lot... in the novel I mean. Looks like he could be very seduce-able... Rebel without a Cause, I mean.  Though, I suppose anyone could be seduced.
You can pass that on to Rebel without a Cause, or you know, if you're him, then try not to choke on your coffee when you laugh at me.

I imagine you checking in tonight, having just gotten out of the shower, after a late dinner. Maybe you had a light day at work and spent time working out? 
I have a question that sort of has nothing to do with anything but my novel... has anyone been able to make the Mad Hatter blush?  He seems like the type of guy that is just incapable of blushing. I know that's not humanly possible, to never blush. But you know what I mean.
You can pass that on too. Less of course he's you, in which case that gives you a small hint at the lead in the novel.

There is an energy that those two wrestlers have, that I haven't seen in a long while. Probably why I found them so inspiring. Why I still do at this moment.
And Herman, if by chance you're not one of them, you might still be in the novel. There are seven other male characters in it.