Sept 1st 2:49pm

So I am reading this book about this guy and his really messed up love life.
It's an autobiography about this confessed cheater, who spends half his life traveling back and forth from America to Japan, and his obsession with Japanese food.

And I stopped to make a cup of coffee.  While I was waiting for the kettle to boil, my mind drifted to the book and then just sort of hit on the date.  I think I had been unconsciously avoiding the calendar because of the date.
Six years ago today, on September 1st 2006; I had my car accident.  My life was changed massively.  Both for the good and for the worse. 

I'm not even half way through the book yet.  It doesn't really have chapters as much as parts.  But the guy keeps talking about how he did not connect his depression with his love life. 
Sounds sort of odd at first, given most people right off blame their lack of relationship for their state of mind/heart.

Honestly, I'm not finished reading yet, but so far I've gotten a total male version of Eat Pray Love  off of this.
One of the themes so far, is that the guy seems to want a relationship so bad that he is willing to pretend to be something he's not all the time.  The section I'm at in the book, just talked about him meeting this woman who hated the very idea of Japan, so he down played how big of a role it was in his life.
One of the first warning signs that he was being unfaithful to her and himself.

Hang with me, it will make some sense in a second.

After my car accident, when I was in the process of dealing with the post trauma of it in therapy, one of the things I realized and had to admit was that, I had been completely miserable before hand.  The people I had been surrounded by for the previous seven years were no longer healthy for me to be around, but I had been too much of a coward to break away from them. 
The circumstances of the accident allowed me to do so.   And I became happier for it.  I had been unfaithful to myself  by being around the people involved in the accident.

You seeing the connection with what the dude in the book was going through and how it made me realize something about myself and my own relationships...

And I know I've talked about the topic a few times over the years before, about how when we get into certain relationships, be them romantic or business; we sometimes give up too much of our self, of our passions and our dignity. How some people demand or manipulate us into believing we shouldn't have a voice or a life outside of them.