Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Rise to it

I got a call from Tarot Lady, asking about a potion for a client of hers.  Yeah, that's how she worded it.

Tarot Lady-:"Well, now that I know you're closer to Timothy's lifestyle then you are to mine...I have a client who has been getting regular readings now about once a month for the last six months, and she's looking to find a way to secure her boyfriend in bed. I just can't ask Timothy to make this, because he knows the man she's dating."

Me-:"Uh...what is it she's wanting? A stay faithful spell or something?"

Tarot Lady-:"Oh no, he can't get it up."

Me-:"Uh, okay well you know they have a pill for that right?"   The sarcasticness was on full tilt.

Tarot Lady-:"He won't take pills. Doesn't believe in putting chemicals into his body." 

Me-:"So asking Timothy, who being a guy might actually know something about that topic..."

She started to talk over me, cutting me off completely, getting louder.

Tarot Lady-:"I can't bring Timothy into this, because he knows the man she's dating and believes that the man is secretly in the closet, and if I tell him about this then he will do something to make him come out."

Me-:"Well, maybe that's why he can't get it up? Maybe he is gay?"

Tarot Lady-:"No, pretty sure it's just wishful thinking on Timothy's part. He thinks everyone is gay."

Me-:"Okay, I'll look through my books and notes and see what I can come up with. No pun intended."

Tarot Lady-:" What should I tell her the price will be?"

Me-:"For?"

Tarot Lady-:"The potion. What do you charge for your spells?"

Me-:" I'm just looking through a few books and writing out a recipe. And there's no guarantee that I'll even find something suitable."

Tarot Lady-:" But you're a witch. It's your job to make it.  You should have seen her face when I told her that you would do this for her. You should be able to get minimum $150 for it. "

I'm one of those people who believes spells should be free. I don't care what the spell is for, it should be free.  Bit pissed off that she went and offered my help without asking me first, then told the lady in question that I would charge her x amount for it.
I went through a similar situation ten years ago with this chick who found out I did astrology charts. That had started off so innocently, like two of her friends had asked, one offered to pay and that was cool cause it was a one time thing.  But after a few times doing the charts, I found out she was charging them way over the top for them. End of that hobby and association.
My skills in astrology are really basic. Not something I want to charge people for.

Which brings me back to this now.

Me-:"I don't know if I'm the right person for this?"

Tarot Lady-:"But you're a witch. This is what witches do, you make spells, you cast spells for a living. Do you have a website?"

And I'm thinking, can I hang up now? 

Me-:"I'll see what I can find, but I can't promise anything." 

She seemed to get distracted by something then and said she'd call me tomorrow morning for it.  Something tells me she's not the type who is used to being told no.



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